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Going from Chronic Pelvic Pain to TMS

Discussion in 'Support Subforum' started by mleach, Aug 21, 2013.

  1. mleach

    mleach New Member

    My journey is a roundabout one back to believing Chronic Prostatitis/Chronic Pelvic Pain Syndrome is TMS.

    After years of vary degrees of severity with this condition I did Dr. Schubiner's program in 2011. I felt better and as I was finishing the program I began taking a muscle relaxer. Kind of shockingly to me my symptoms started to improve and I didn't think about it again and figured it must have been the muscle relaxers.

    I went about 18 months of being pain free but after the birth of my second child in April we decided my wife would stop working. Clearly I was very stressed about money, having two young children, renovating our house, new crappy health insurance and low and behold I had another flare up.

    This time I immersed myself in bio mechanics and fascia and all things physical so I now have a complete understanding of why I'm prone to pelvic floor tension and how that manifests my symptoms. I've been obsessively working on developing core strength, unlocking my psoas, etc. However none of that addresses why I have tension and clenching of my pelvic floor and that's my mind.

    So I'm back starting Dr. Schubiner's program again and am having trouble letting go of all the physical ideas and body work I've been doing the past 2 months thinking that was the salvation.

    I also struggle because one of my symptoms is pain and swelling on the right side of my scrotum. I've had numerous ultrasounds and everything is fine with it but I think the nerve is so damaged the slightest impact or compression of it creates pain and swelling. Yesterday out of the blue I got jolts of pain in my right testicle and then the swelling followed and I woke up to an even more swollen scrotum today. Even when I was feeling 100% if I ran without tight support for my scrotum it would hurt and swell for a day or two. I also know that when I had an argument with my wife I had that pain start again a few weeks ago after not having it for days so it also correlates to emotional pain as well as physical.

    Either way I know TMS is at play here and I need to do something to lower my anxiety levels which have been through the roof for months. Thanks for any advice and for reading my story.
     
    Ruth_L likes this.
  2. Eric "Herbie" Watson

    Eric "Herbie" Watson Beloved Grand Eagle

    mleach do you do daily meditation?
     
  3. mleach

    mleach New Member

    I didn't when I was feeling better but have been meditating daily for the past month or so. It definitely helps but I still struggle mightily to not just focus on my pain and then let my mind wander from there while I meditate. I read Full Catastrophe Living and have been doing that program. I can clearly correlate my flare ups to stressful times in my life and even though I know that I get into this hyper anxious state where I feel like I have to search and search and search for the quickest way to heal permanently. Now I'm back to the MBS which is probably what I knew all along.
     
  4. Eric "Herbie" Watson

    Eric "Herbie" Watson Beloved Grand Eagle

    Yea just stay here and search- that searching that I did for years got me only 1 real cure- here
    if your looking to heal, then get ready for about 1 year minimum -
    I healed 7 months ago but now 1 yr. later I've been rehealing and rehealing
    since learning new thoughts, techniques, styles to put to use in my life
    Now since I've sowed this long, I reap the benefits
    Understand though I've studied MBS since I was knee high to a grass hopper.

    You have to have that uh-huh moment to just get it or understand your going to
    heal from this tms no problem- it a satisfying emotion.

    This is what all the soothing techniques are
    1 month is a little time for meditation to take effect
    more like 3-6 months minimum or more.

    Learn all the ins and outs here like the Alan Gordon program
    The SEP and so forth- Yes repetition till you get it
    and it helps with the soothing.
     
    CRICH, amagnuson amy and nancy like this.
  5. mleach

    mleach New Member


    Thanks for the advice. I know my meditation practice has a long way to go to where it's really benefiting me and calming me down. In reality last time after I did Dr. Schubiner's program it probably did take a year till I was feeling close to 100%. What helped the most was I stopped all treatment of any sort, didn't google anything to do with health again and lived as I did pre-TMS. Once I did that the anxiety slowly lifted and it felt like I left a mental fog finally.

    I tend to want to know everything possible about something and I struggle to balance having a healthy knowledge of a subject and obsessing on it. I could read this site all day if I was able but I wonder if I'm not better off not reading it all. I struggle with that.
     
  6. Eric "Herbie" Watson

    Eric "Herbie" Watson Beloved Grand Eagle

    You got it down good- just learn in moderation, we can become knowledge junkies as well as wrong thinking worriers
    so do a program be calm and go with the flow of moderation. You've already got most all the answers in your first paragraph
     
  7. cirrusnarea

    cirrusnarea Well known member

    Mleach,

    Wow, I meet yet another person on here suffering from chronic testicle pain. It's not fun, as you know. I never had swelling though, but since your tests have come out alright, I can see how the mind could create swelling. I can tell you that yes, Chronic Pelvic Pain/Prostatits is indeed TMS. I know because I did everything to cure mine, but within a week of accepting the TMS diagnosis I was cured. It has flared up a couple times, but nothing serious and I could really care less so it goes away. The other side of that is now I have chronic back pain, lol, so I'm not cured yet, but that is one symptom that I feel like I have overcome! Not to mention that doctors have no explanation for CPPS, urologists who you usually get directed to are utterly clueless most of the time. They assume the prostate is the problem and prescribe a beta blocker, or assume there is some kind of bacterial infection they can't find and give you endless courses of antibiotics. Even books like Headache in the Pelvis, which do a good job of explaining the situation, still fall short as they try to find a physical reason for the pain.

    I have a problem with anxiety too, it's leveled out a bit but I'm still not out of the woods. I have anxious periods and now I'm having heart palpitations which have me on edge. The best thing you can do to combat anxiety is find a good psychologist. Biofeedback is an option you also might want to consider. Whether or not you take meds for anxiety is up to you and your doctor, but personally I'd steer clear of drugs like Paxil, etc. Just my opinion, always discuss the risks and benefits with your doc and make the decision you feel is best. I do have some xanax on hand for my anxiety, but these drugs don't alter the chemical balance of the brain as the ssri drugs do. It can be habit forming so you can't take it every day, and docs don't like to prescribe them anymore.

    My anxiety also started with googling my symptoms. I don't do this anymore, except on rare occasions. If I have an issue I speak to my doc about it.

    Best of luck, it's not fun, but we'll get through it.
     
  8. mleach

    mleach New Member

    Yeah I've gone the usual route, antibiotics for months, beta blockers, PT, etc. The only times my symptoms ever improved were when I hit a breaking point and avoided reading, talking, or anything else to do with CPPS. I got better slowly over the period of a few months after doing Dr. Schubiners program in 2011 after 3 straight years of pain and bladder symptoms. I'm 2 months in to this flare and can't seem to get to that point where my mind says enough and starts to function more normally. I think my symptoms diminish to a point to allow that and I'm not there yet. Who knows. I do believe the Headache in the Pelvis idea that chronic pelvic floor tension creates the pain, inflammation, etc. As you mentioned though the point they're missing is why is there chronic tension in the pelvis and that's TMS in my view.

    The swelling in my testicle is so bizarre but I think that the nerve is so fried that when it fires the pain signal inflammation starts. I lifted a heavy box the other night and my scrotum swelled and pain got worse. I bumped my testicle taking a shower last week and the same thing happened. It happens with impact, when lifting, and when I'm stressed and clenching. It confuses the hell out of me.
     
  9. cirrusnarea

    cirrusnarea Well known member

    The swelling is confusing, but I think you've found the right place. Mine also went away once I stopped caring.

    When it comes to saying you may have nerve damage though, has a doctor diagnosed this? We can come up with some scary scenarios on our own, but we're not doctors. I know becuase I do the same thing, but I have to realize that it's my imagination getting the best of me.
     
  10. mleach

    mleach New Member

    Doctors have only ever told me I have "epididymitis" but when I've been given an ultrasound everything looks ok and there's no bacteria. Last time I had an ultrasound during a very similar flare up 2 years ago I did have a small hydocele. Basically the urologist I last saw 2 years ago said he didn't really know what he could do for me and there was no reason he could see for me to be in pain. I've had one in the past who insisted my prostate was inflamed, which inflamed my seminal vesicles and that's what gives me the epididimytis symptoms and the swelling. He believed prostate massage would break up the inflammation and allow everything to heal. When we tried it over a couple of days in a row it caused the worst flare up I've ever had.

    I know that even when I had no pelvic pain symptoms earlier this year if I went running without tight briefs or some type of support for my scrotum I'd still get minor swelling and pain for awhile. I'm half convinced myself I have a "sports hernia" or something like that but I also know when my kids are screaming or I get in an argument with my wife I get pain then too because I find myself clenching my pelvic floor.

    It's a struggle but I want to focus on what I do know and turn a blind eye to everything unknown. I know muscular tension is the cause of my symptoms. Muscular tension comes via TMS. TMS comes from my past issues, current stressors, and my personality traits. Having 18 months without pelvic issues and then going back down this road again really had my mind shaken and it's been a real struggle to stay on a path without the endless searches for something new that I've missed.
     
  11. cirrusnarea

    cirrusnarea Well known member

    Hey, reading your post I was reminded of some of the worst aspects of the condition. The urologists not being any help, the countless uncomfortable examinations, and the uncomfortable treatments such as prostate massage. I know how awful it can be. All I can say is you can over come it. The worst part, the tests, the treatments, the questions, is all behind you. Now you know you have TMS and you can focus entirely on the recovery.

    Basically though, since you had no problems for 18 months, what you're experiencing is a relapse. Here's a good article on that:
    http://www.tmswiki.org/ppd/Relapser's_curse_-_there_is_hope,_by_Skizzik

    You can overcome it. Mine is 99% gone. I had a flare up a few weeks ago, but I couldn't have cared less and it went away. My guess is you had a minor flare up for whatever reason and started worrying about, this perpetuates the cycle. Unless your doctor tells you you have nerve damage, just let it, and any other scary thoughts leave your mind. I know, it's easier said than done, but just work on it.When you say it has you shaken, to me that's a clear sign that anxiety is involved and that is a clear signal of TMS.

    There is the free program on this site you can make use of, and read Sarno's books. Be sure to follow Eric's advice as well.
     
    Eric "Herbie" Watson likes this.
  12. mleach

    mleach New Member

    Thanks for the kind words. To say I have anxiety about this condition again is an understatement. When I woke up that morning and noticed my scrotum was swollen my heart rate jumped, I was shaky, and short of breath. It's been 2 months of meditation to even help the anxiety a little. I wake up each morning hours before normal with my heart racing, obsessively think about pelvic pain all day, then repeat the next day.

    When it came back I started learning about posture, alignment, and how all the muscles of the core interact with the pelvis. I connected with a guy who overcame his pelvic pain by correcting his alignment and developing his core so that his pelvic floor went back to normal function. He's been coaching me and I've been doing 2-3 hours a day of exercises, meditation, stretching, etc. I've been getting increasingly frustrated with bring told my lack of glute strength is the cause of my pain because j had the same weak glutes 2 months ago with no pain.

    That's what lead me back to realizing its TMS but I still have this worry that I should be doing squats instead of sitting with my wife. I've kind of hit the wall where even though I know there's a value to stretching and exercising it just reminds me in not well and I feel like I'm better off doing nothing if it helps mentally. I tried not to do anything this morning but I got scared and did it anyway.
     
  13. cirrusnarea

    cirrusnarea Well known member

    It's up to you how you want to combat the condition, but I can tell you from experience, my pelvic pain went away within a week of accepting the TMS diagnosis and stopping all the stretches. I was doing 2 hours plus of stretches a day. I didn't mind it at the time, as it kept my mind off of the anxiety and it also gave me something to occupy my time. But when I gave up the stretches, I felt like I finally got my life back.

    The anxiety is awful, I've been there. When I was really anxious I didn't sleep at all for a few nights just due to the worry, I was an emotional basket case. I sometimes feel anxious just thinking about how bad off I was. So I know how you feel. I know about the waking up early being anxious with the heart pounding. Strangely enough, last week it started happening again, and I'm not even consciously worried about anything! It's started to calm down though.

    The best thing I can think of to say, is that if you've accepting the TMS diagnosis, then give up the stretches, but also give up preoccupying yourself with the condition and getting better. The more you push yourself to recover quickly, the more your body will resist. I stopped caring about the pelvic pain and it went away.
     
    Eric "Herbie" Watson likes this.
  14. mleach

    mleach New Member

    Yeah I've been doing all the exercises and stretches telling myself Im rehabbing an injury. That let me feel like I was moving forward and doing something to control my fate. If I step back I've been at it for 2 months and am the same if not worse now.

    I got better when I stopped PT, cut way back on the stretches and stopped caring also. I always vowed that if it came back I'd know what to do and I'd never get depressed or anxious again. But here I am starting over from as deep an abyss as I've ever been in. I'm definitely cutting way back on the exercises and just trying to live like I did before this flare up if I can even remember what that was like. I feel like there's a place for core strengthening one day but for now all its doing is keeping me in a sickness mindset .
     
  15. cirrusnarea

    cirrusnarea Well known member

    Follow the program daily and all will be well. Feel free to keep in touch, I'll be happy to answer any questions you have. Just remember you can't rush recovery. And from someone who also has TMS I know how difficult that can be.
     
    Eric "Herbie" Watson likes this.
  16. mleach

    mleach New Member

    I started making some progress and was really doing better mentally the past few days. My anxiety was down and I was able to focus on non-pain thoughts at times. I even laid on a couch and watched TV at night a few times over the weekend which I hadn't done in months thinking my time would be better spent stretching and doing squats, etc. Unfortunately I decided to have some "adult time" with my wife and during ejaculation I got a sharp pain in my right testicle. I don't think this was a trigger I was anticipating because previously this hasn't changed my pain in anyway other than possibly improve it.

    The pain from my right testicle/epididymis has worsened again and the swelling has increased yet again after a few days of decreasing swelling. I've said before that I know TMS leads to my tight pelvic muscles and the bladder symptoms but there's just this extreme sensitivity in the right side of my scrotum that flares up at the slightest mishap that seems like a physical symptom yet no Dr. can tell me why. It honestly felt like my scrotum was pulled up so tight that it hit a bone or something during ejaculation. It all comes back to increased pelvic floor tension and that's TMS at it's core. I know it will eventually get better in a few days and probably in a few months it will be normal but man is it hard to keep having set back after set back when the pain finally improves.

    I think I just needed to vent about this a little. I guess this is a public journal for me at this point.
     
    Eric "Herbie" Watson likes this.
  17. cirrusnarea

    cirrusnarea Well known member

    The most important thing is that you felt better mentally, this is more important to recovery than a reduction in pain. When I had CPPS, the feeling better came first, then recovery.

    I totally relate about feeling the need to do stretches, most of my free time for several months was spent on them. But they did serve a purpose by lessening my anxiety and making me feel better that I was doing something to recover! There comes a point when you can move past them though.

    I had post-ejaculatory pain as well. Usually in the right. Also, the acute pain lasted about a week before letting up, so give it time, it will go away on it's own. It's a difficult point to come to, but the key for me was that I just stopped caring about it. I don't know how I came to it. But to be fair, I think it was that due to the symptom imperative I starting having back pain, and actually found that I preferred the scrotal pain as I could at least walk and be active. Although I didn't have swelling, I did have one physiological symptom...it felt like my testicles were hard to the touch and were smaller. Try to stay positive by remembering that you have a benign condition, it went away before, it will go away again when its ready. Avoid setting a time and date for recovery.
     
    Eric "Herbie" Watson likes this.
  18. yb44

    yb44 Beloved Grand Eagle

    Pardon me, a female with no personal knowledge about scrotums or ejaculation, but I was reading another post where Hecate talks about the meanings behind our individual symptoms. Urinary tract issues = something 'pissing you off.' Skin problems = something unpleasant getting under your skin. Could this ejaculation issue have a similar underlying explanation, such as you might want to hold back or not let something go so when you do, your symptoms worsen? Just a thought. I will now pick up my skirt and hasten away...
     
    Ellen and tarala like this.
  19. healing1580

    healing1580 New Member

    I am new to this site. I am a 32 year old male with symptoms of chronic pelvic pain syndrome for last 11 months. It has been a really tough journey with countless visits to Urologists and GI doctors - all testing is normal.
    I get sharp/stabbing pains in the groin/rectal/perineum/suprapubic regions that moves around - sometimes also affecting lower abdomen.
    Things like bowel movements and any sexual activity make the symptoms much worse.
    Because of this, I have become very depressed and anxious.
    I am trying to determine if this could all be related to TMS? I have other random symptoms like tinnitus, heartburn, low back pain, neck pain.
    I would appreciate anyone's advice.
    Thank you.


     
  20. Eric "Herbie" Watson

    Eric "Herbie" Watson Beloved Grand Eagle

    Hello healing1580 you are at the right place
    Yes if all is rules normal, then you have tms
    Have you been through a lot of stressful situations lately
    Do you miss something? Have you read any of the tms books
    do you have anger or fear toward your symptoms?
    let me know we will begin here ok
    Nice to see you aboard.
     

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