A practical idea for stress reduction (?)

It seems to me that reason we get sick and then sicker is often not just one life event or scenario but the compounding “death spiral” where one problem piled on the other and chronic pain makes it damned hard to address all of them. So here is little inventory I thought up to help. I have made and will present some of my personal inventory but have not yet rolled out actions, many of which are embarrassingly simple.

I’d like to tip my hat to Lissa Rankin and also Trung No ( great interview with him on Like Mind Like Body this last summer) for their inspiration here. Also Nance Selfridge snd Rachel Zoffness. “All the company of saints”.

Here’s partial list. Column 1 is description of problem. Column 2 is it actionable Y/N/M. Column 3 level of anxiety (1-10)and pain it is causing. Column 4 anticipated difficulty of action.

16 year old daughter has a moron boyfriend who has no place in the gene pool and they sleep together using condoms as BC but kids are dumb and I don’t need her pregnant. Actionable? Yes. Anxiety level 8-9. Difficulty of resolution (BC pills ) ordered online is like a 1.

Wife and both mid forties and just like above a minor slip up could make a baby. Actionable? Yes. Anxiety Level 7-8. Difficulty of resolution is 3-4 consisting of paying for a vasectomy and an ice pack.

I have a fairly high net worth which is not a problem but my anxiety about losing some or all is high. Actionable? Yes. Anxiety level 8. Difficulty to resolve unknown but likely 5/6, see a lawyer and asset management person.

I have a couple non TMS health issues that have gone unaddressed for years. Actionable? Yes. Anxiety level 8. Difficulty to resolve 2-3 with a scrip and a little fine tuning. No biggie.

Those are 4 and perhaps they are all relatively simple but what what really gets me is how despite having adequate resources they haven’t been addressed. I have spent dozens to hundreds of hours worrying about all of them. Worrying and procrastination and doomsday scenarios when I could knock out or make progress on all of these in a month tops. It’s a mindset problem, and I need to treat these things as straightforward solvable concerns instead of moral failings (for example I never wanted my daughter to be sexually active at 14).

These are all high ticket emotionally. But for someone else going grocery shopping might be really hard. Way actionable. Easy and cheap. As you knock out any problem and the associated anxiety it should open space for healing. Also I do think sometimes you need to tell your boss to fuck off ( I know I do) or your spouse to maybe be more supportive, etc and those are fruit higher up on the tree but could be pretty tasty if you reach that high.

What do you people think?

 

I think this is a great idea. I have seen something like this elsewhere, in several places I think even (in the many self-help books I have the occasion to read over the past year, lol). Three or four columns, identify what you can change and what you can't, forget the latter, make a plan for the former. It's funny you mention grocery shopping because that is actually a kind of trigger for me (any kind of standing or slow walking) but I am trying to move in the direction of just letting it go, just do it, be indifferent to symptoms. It's easier said than done. Anyway, I think this kind of table is a good idea.