Exhausted with constant medical problems

I am working my way through the pain and the fear and everything else that comes with it. Been at this only since last august. I am at a really low point right now - my left shoulder has bothered me since 2016 which is when my back pain ( was the primary issue) got the best of me. Now thanks to the things I have learned here and all the books I have read, I 've made progress with the back pain. Left shoulder was evaluated by orthopedic surgeon 2016 and he called it "shoulder entrapment syndrome" which relates to the tendon. Now the pain and range of motion are much worse. Cannot lift my arm over my head, behind me or away from my body. I hate to go back to ortho but feel I will have to. I am just finishing Steve O's book - really learned a lot (and laughed a lot). I am in a particularly stressful period right now...being evaluated by cardiology and wearing a 30 day monitor. They are trying to sort out whether the med I am on is too strong or if I need a pacemaker. MD cut the med in half; I wont have the results of this until late Feb. I feel like I start to make progress and then get hit with the next thing. I am so upset and depressed today...I could use some encouragement.

 

this remind me of a member who posted a while ago. He said he believed 100% his symptoms are tms. He complained that he had practice diligently all the tms methods from all these expert, he even went to see a tms expert, and his symptoms won't go away. Everyone here feel bad for him and we all try to help, try to give advises that we think will help him. It doesn't work. His pain is still with him months later.
At that time he is going through a nasty divorce, his wife cheated on him. Then he couldn't work because of his pain. He worried about his house and his finance... How in the world anyone can stop having tms while in that situation? I think even Jesus or Buddha come back to earth they wouldn't be able to help him.
The point I try to make is: if you're under tremendous stress, if you're traumatize be your current life circumstances, then tms symptoms will appear, no matter what you do, and it won't go away no matter what you do. You have to de-stress, you have to get yourself out of those traumatize situations before you can start to heal. And remember it is all about perception. Life is bad or good is all depend on how we look at it.
I know of two guys that went through the exact same bad situation and made it out differently. A few years ago both of their houses were foreclosed on by the banks due to financial difficulty. After the house were foreclosed on one of them were so stressed out he developed all kind of health problem. He couldn't sleep, he got migraine and back pain. He got heart problem and eventually was hospitalized. The other guys was so happy it was all ended. He told me he no longer stay up late at night thinking about how to keep his house. He is at rock bottom now, there is only one way for him to go, which is up. He will make it, he will survive.

I would like to recommend the book: "Stop worrying and start Living" by Dale Carnegie. It was written long before Doctor Sarno came out with his tms theory but in it you will see ton of tms example and how to over come it.

"Two men looking out from the prison bars, one saw the mud the other saw the stars."

 

Thanks for your reply, Balto. The last thing I want to do is make myself worse by focusing on what I perceive is wrong. It is possible that all this cardiac stuff will work out for me. I feel like much of the cardiac symptoms are due to how I process stress. Of course the doctors dont get that except in a superficial way. I have a friend who was just diagnosed with prostate ca with spread to the bones. He started chemo last month with high hopes and is doing well. So well, that he went on a planned trip with his son to Scotland for 10 days. Like you said, it is how you look at it. If he can do that, I can work my way to a success story with this pain and cardiac stuff. Thank you.

 

Timbercat, we all fall into the trap of negativity. It's how our brains are wired for survival in a primitive world. Our brains keep us negative in order to stay alive, by constantly scanning the horizon for imminent danger. The problem is, we no longer live in a primitive world, and the constant negativity is really bad for us in the long run. Beating it is hard, I know! I'm constantly fighting it myself.

I've been having a hard time with negativity since, oh, sometime in 2016... and the result is that my blood pressure has crept up beyond an acceptable level, and I can't seem to get it back down on my own. I really don't want to mess around with hypertension, and BP meds are pretty ubiquitous in my family. My dad and my brother both started taking them in their fifties, and I just found out that my 4-yrs-younger sister has been on it for a few years.

So I finally, reluctantly, agreed to start on a low dose of a well-known BP med. At first I was negative, resentful, and anxious about side effects. Then I realized I didn't have to be any of those. That first I needed to get over myself, and give myself credit for going longer than my family members. I also decided that I didn't need to experience any of the side effects, most of which are probably due to stress and anxiety anyway; or that if I did, I just needed to tell my brain that yes, there is an alien substance making some changes in my body, but it's nothing to fear, and it is going to help me in the long run.

I did feel a little weird for a few days, but the insert had said that my body would need some time to get used to the medication - which went hand-in-hand with my little self-talk. Now I'm just hoping that the two-week check will show improvement. And, I'm working on the negativity that the current world situation creates for me, and thinking about how to be constructive on my own behalf. Honestly, I do believe I could conquer this on my own - but it's going to take a whole lot more will power and commitment (starting with a REAL commitment to yoga and meditation) than I am apparently willing to generate at the moment.

Anyway, this is only vaguely like your situation - the main thing I want to suggest is that you mindfully examine your propensity to be negative, and see if you can change that conversation. The main thing you want to recognize is that your brain WANTS you to be negative - but ultimately, you do have a choice!

~Jan

 

Hi Jan, I can chit chat about Lisiniprol 5 Mg if you want. Before retiring a well meaning doctor put me on it. I did a massive study ( the engineer in me), and put daily readings in a spread sheet. I got off it after 3 years or so and I have a story somewhere. What a waste of time Let me now. Yesterday my BP was 121/80, not bad for a 69 year old.

 

Jan, I wish you good luck getting your BP down - if that requires med for awhile - so be it. I too was on BP medication but it was discontinued as my BP is now on the low side. I exchanged the BP med for 2 cardiac meds for rhythm problems. Resentful is definitely the word for both the diagnosis and treatment. I like how you said u feel like u could manage this but cannot make the commitment to yoga and meditation at present. I really get that sadly. I could literally chant affirmations and "I am safe I am calm" almost all of my waking hours. That is how fearful and negative I find myself right now. It amazes me how some people can rise above the worst things...I was just reading about Scott Hamilton who has not only survived cancer, but is now in the watch and wait period for his third benign brain tumor. He says he is too busy to worry about it and is preparing to go to So Korea for the Olympics next month. His doctors told him the last MRI showed the tumor had shrunk - which they say they have never seen without treatment. So Scott says he is relying on family, faith, good nutrition and just believing good things happen on the other side of the scary thing. I want to learn to believe like that now. I've done it previously in my life with good results. I can only keep trying to meditate and replace the negative thoughts with positive ones. I dont know why I gave this cardiologist so much power anyway - I have some too! Thank u and good health to u.

 

Timbercat, I had exactly what you had last year, mainly frozen shoulder, but could not raise above my head or behind my back, and it’s spasmed quite a lot. I accepted the pain and told myself that I was structurally fine, and then I worked every day to strengthen it to get it over my head and behind my back. The doctor said that frozen shoulder could take up to three years to thaw, but mine took six months. Of course, it’s TMS, but I understand the exhaustion with dealing with physiological problems. Mine seem to come in increments of six months, and then move to another area. Do not go back to physical therapy, it will just prolong it. But, don’t let it stop you from doing the things that you can do and don’t force yourself to do the things you can’t. I took it day by day, and within months, I was healed.

You have to tell yourself every day that you do not fear the pain, and that it is there to protect you. I’m still learning this lesson five years in to this work, but it is true. When you feel the fear coming on, the way to break the cycle is to say daily mantras,such as “I have TMS, there is nothing structurally wrong with me, think psychologically. Don’t be afraid of the pain. You are loved. You will heal.” I say that continually, day in and day out. And then, just do it anyway. You know you can’t hurt yourself, so courage is where this comes in. It’s hard, but you can do it.

 

Thanks, Andy, I'll PM you!

 

High BP can be helped, in many cases, with medicine. I have been fortunate and not had an issue with high BP, but two of my siblings were on different BP meds for BP control a few years ago (about three years ago). Both of them suffered severe problems with the particular meds they were on. (at different times, not simultaneously). Both of these drugs (it turned out) had warnings about the possible effects, but these effects were considered unusual so many docs did not immediately (if at all) recognize the drug as a problem. I guess my comments are that sometimes, drugs cause symptoms, and that sometimes these symptoms can be dangerous, and that not all symptoms are because of TMS.
So, JanAtheCPA, please be careful and pay attention to your body as it is adjusting (hopefully without side effects) to this new ingredient in your system.
Lainey

 

Thanks Lainey - and you betcha I pay attention. I'm also under orders to appear after two weeks to check the BP and get a blood test, with semi-regular checks thereafter, and I always do what I'm told if I've agreed to engage in some kind of medical intervention

That being said, I read the entire insert about side-effects, but geez, it essentially covers everything and anything that anyone could possibly experience. It's kind of ridiculous, in fact.

I decided that I'm not going to be worried, because I am basically very healthy, and at least I don't need to worry about drug interactions, because I don't take any other meds, and I practice moderation and common sense regarding everything else that I put into my body. I don't take any weird supplements or herbs, nor massive amounts of the ones I do take (high-quality bone minerals, B, C, and fish oil (which the optometrist just assured me is good for aging eyes!)) I don't smoke, I drink plenty of water, and I'm extremely moderate about alcohol and caffeine...

The instructions said to take the med with a full glass of water. A lot of people don't take this, or hydration in general, seriously, and that alone is the root cause of many emergency room visits. Simply stopping and drinking a glass of water will cure and/or prevent a lot of ills!

THAT being said, I've essentially given in for now, but I have not accepted that this is going to be long-term. I have some more work to do, obviously.

 

I'm sure you will do fine. Both of my siblings were also doing all the right things (water, exercise, diet, one took no other drugs, the other took a thyroid supp.)
Actually they are both now off of their BP meds. Their BP went back to 'normal' after the 'crisis' events.
Hope you do well too.
Lainey

 

Dang, you never know, do you? I'm on the one that Andy mentioned - it's been around for a long time, and the effects are really well-known, which gives me a little bit of confidence. But, my friends, you are all correct to indicate that this should not be a long-term solution.

 

Good discussion here...blood pressure is one of those complex body things that so many different elements contribute to! In The Divided Mind a cardiologist has an excellent discussion of this if anyone wants to re-read that- high BP can be due purely to TMS but can also be due to so many other things out of our control like genetics.

In my own experience, my BP is thankfully pretty low (I mostly attribute this to genetics), but had been reading a little bit high at my OB's office while i've been pregnant. They had me take it daily at home and it's still low the rest of the time, so we figured out it's just "white coat syndrome" aka my brain going into fight or flight whenever I have an appointment! I often don't even feel nervous there, but some anxiety from earlier on in the pregnancy lingers around and the conditioned response persists. So strange how the brain just automatically reacts in the way it thinks it's protecting you like other types of TMS.

 

Jules. Appreciate hearing from someone who also had shoulder pain. I have not called ortho yet -- I just know what they will say. I will give it some time and see if it will improve. Thank you.