When something physical turns up during recovery...

Hi everyone,

I have been following Dr. Sarnos method for three months now and my back pain is constantly getting better. That`s amazing and I am sure I will regain my old shape, even if it takes some time. I developed some knee pain which I do not take seriously (symptom imperative).

Now something very frustrating has turned up: I had a session at the dentist where I had to open my mouth widely for a long time. Afterwards the muscles felt strained and I had trouble eating. So a few days later I went to an osteo for some relief and that was not a good idea: she manipulated my jaw to intensely and the problem got even worse. I told myself: this is going to get better, just give it time- but after a week I still couldn`t eat properly.

So last week I went to my PT who is excellent if you actually have a physical issue. She told me my jaw was probably just irritated by the intense treatment before. She gave me a very careful treatment but it didn`t help. It feels like my jaw is struggling to get into its old position and that puts enormous pressure on all the muscles involved. Interesting enough it doesn`t really hurt, I simply cannot open my mouth properly. All of my joints are clicking and driving me crazy.
I`ll have one more session with my PT. She is very good and if there is anything physically wrong I am sure she can solve it. If she cannot it must be TMS.

Today for the first time I felt some relief and I am trying to be patient. I have been asking myself if this might just be a wicked way of TMS trying to stick with me. Talking to my brain, however, did not work in this case.

It gives me a deep terrifying feeling of panic not beeing able to speak and eat normally. So this is how I am handling it:

1. I forbid myself to read about jaw conditions on the internet. I do not want to read scary stories and I also know that TMJ and such can be part of TMS, so why bother?

2. By telling myself that I am certainly not seriously injured and there is no long-term damage involved.
I will only get further examination if there is no other way.

3. Even if I cannot figure out how much of it is TMS, I will continue my daily TMS work, so if it is the brain trying to use an actual temporary issue for creating a new permanent distraction I will not let it.

4. I am telling myself that a strained joint and sore muscles can take some time to get back to normal, and as we all know "The body heals."

5. I`ll look closely on current emotional problems. The jaw reacts very much to psychological pressure, that`s for sure.

6. By not talking to many people about it, because whenever I told somenone about my back history I heard things like "Oh my God, my boyfriend/cousin/ mother also had sooo much pain and woke up paralized one morning etc." - just the kind of things which freak you out even more.

So if anyone has some positive inspirational thoughts on this topic I`ll be glad to read them!

 

Hi, Annette. Surfing Dr. Google can be a mistake in scaring us about the worst that happens to some people. Try to focus being positive that your jaw pain is from TMS, repressed emotions that might just be worrying.

Journal to discover if something happening now or recent may have triggered emotions from the past that you have tried to keep hidden.

The fact that you are feeling better is a sure sign that you are believing more in TMS. It takes 100 percent belief in TMS to totally heal.

 

Annette, I had a similar experience following a novacaine injection in my jaw for some dental work about 2 months ago. I can tell you that mine took almost 2 weeks to go away. Yours will go away. I'm going to suggest that having it adjusted might be keeping yours irritated.
I think the muscle gets a bit swollen from irritation. I decided to treat mine like a temporary injury that was on the mend. I knew TMS would keep going if I got fearful about it.
I would send my jaw thoughts of "melting the muscle," relaxing back into place.
It did. Yours will too. But, treat it like TMS. Going to get adjustments is just prolonging your fear that there is permanent injury.
There isn't. Your jaw got irritated from your mouth being positioned open for so long.
Relax and let it recover.

Marcia

 

Marcia, thank you so much for your reply, that`s just what I needed to hear!

I have seen my PT today and she called the whole thing "an overreaction to a treatment which was to intense". She tried to "bring the system back to normal" by using accupressure points and only giving a few minutes of gentle treatment to my jaw. We agreed that it is probably a minor physical issue which is intensified by psychosomatic mechanisms. Her advice was to take a few days off, not to speak to much and to figure out what might be bothering me on an emotional level.

After all, it doesnt`really hurt, so it is not injured, just tight. It is still soup and smoothies for me, then ;-) I cannot imagine that one session with the osteo has put my jaw in an unnatural position it can`t resolve.

One thing I realized: I have had TMS with various symptoms for about 20 years (I am 36 years old), constantly getting worse while growing up. I have taken this over from my mother who has been ill without a diagnosis as long as I can remember. It is absolutely common in my family to see a doctor three times a week and to get regular treatments, if you need them or not. Everybody knows she is doing it to avoid dealing with her feelings, but sadly she is unable to accept this idea.

So now I have finally figured out what is causing my physical symptoms and decided to stop getting treatments. I didn`t stop them all at once because they were such a regular part of my life (which has gotten very chaotic after a horrible breakup) but made a slow withdrawal. Now would be the time to stop completely, that was the plan. I am already feeling much better, and I am working on resuming certain movements I have been scared of. Any new vague symptoms or pain in new areas I would probably call TMS and ignore them. So, Surprise, something physical happens which really confuses me and puts me of track. It is particularly terrifying for me to not being able to open my mouth because I am a freelance singer!
My PT who knows about my TMS family history calls it "the body looking for a new stage". She has actually encouraged me to stop regular treatments.

It makes me wonder: what kind of a person am I without TMS? If I am not constantly weak and ill for some unknown reason, that probably means that I can live a full adult life. Being able to manage things myself, without a partner to take care of me and support me when things get bad (which is a huge issue after being in a relationship for 12 years), seems a revolutionary idea!
Convincing myself that I am a normal and healthy person really alters a huge part of my identity and that is wonderful and scary at the same time!

 

Annette, 36 is still quite young. I never got it, that my stuff was TMS until I was 55.
Now, that I understand it, I feel younger than I did in my 40's.
Celebrate that you know now and don't have to live the life your mother lives.

Different physical things still appear in my life too. We are human. Humans like the comfort of a pattern, even when it's miserable.
And, it's still so apparent that my things will appear in areas that matter most to me, just as yours has, (your mouth, you are a singer).
This is always clue #1 for me that my brain has created it from fear.

As the poet Rilke wrote: "Love the question." Don't fear not knowing the answer to who you might be without your physical ailments…just love that you now KNOW and have the chance to live fully.

I think your posts are very insightful and will help many.

 

I am sorry to hear that you had to suffer until turning 55. Great that you feel so much better now! Congratulations!

It is actually a huge chance for me to know about TMS and not having to follow my mother`s path any more. I am most grateful for that and it still seems to good to be true ;-)
But with time confidence will grow, I am sure. There is so much to look forward to, even though there is still a lot of work ahead and I have to deal with my current scary setback.

As you say, we are all human and we should give us the time we need to re-condition the mind.

Your quote of Rilke is from one of my favourite poems, actually. Thanks for reminding me.

Best wishes from Germany to the US