MusicMan11

Hi Guys!

I just read The Mindbody Prescription today and after 6 months of off and on chronic tension headaches, migraines, anxiety, post-nasal drip and a white bacteria overgrowth on the back of my tongue, I think I am ready to commit to the fact that I have TMS. I am sorry this post is so long, but here is my story of this year. I am a 28 year old male, currently lives alone in a house with my dog, 10ish minutes near all of my family members.

Side Note: I fit the description of TMS perfectly - all my life I have been a perfectionist, goodist, want to be liked by everyone, straight-A, high-performer in all aspects of my life.

Let me begin where it all started.

I am a 28 year old male and at the end of this past December, I got the first migraine I have ever experienced. I used to be one of those people who used to think that a migraine was just an exaggerated headache (boy am I sorry for ever thinking that!) Prior to that I never had any health issues. I went to my physical once a year, dentist a couple times a year and everything was great. After the first migraine, this cycle continued and continued from tension headache, pressure, migraine, and mild anxiety started to set in where every day I was scared of getting a headache and doing anything to cause it, but I was still able to relax. I went to my GP who first thought it was a sinus infection. Took some antibiotic and it got a little better but the cycle continued. She then referred me to a headache specialist. I got an MRI end of January - all clear, neck CT at the ER when my neck was in intense pain - all clear. I've tried using vitamin B2, Magnesium, B12, diets, acupuncture, massages, chiropractors, Reiki, Psychic readings and nothing was working.

I saw an ENT in March and she informed me I had a bone spur pushing into my septum, I had a severe deviated septum and my turbinates were enlarged, with little oxygen coming through and recommended surgery. I thought this was it, this was my cure. I had a septoplasty and turbinate reduction (my first ever surgery) at the end of March and well, the recovery triggered every possible emotion possible out of me. Splints up my nose for a week without breathing out my nose, breathing with my mouth open, constant headaches, etc. I developed severe anxiety, restlessness, couldn't sleep and all of this was something I had never experienced before in my life and was scaring the crap out of me.

I finally got the splints out and felt amazing. The next day however I had an 8 hour nose bleed and went to the ER where they put this "rapid rhino" up my nose which was literally the most painful experience of my life and immediately had the ENT take it out as soon as her office opened and all was ok and she was pissed the ER didn't call her. I got over that but then the next week I noticed my tongue was white and had bacteria overgrowth. A family member was convinced it was just Thrush from the antibiotics I was on from recovery. I called my GP again for an anti-fungal and took two rounds of it but nothing was helping. We then took a culture sample and I tested negative for a fungal infection after weeks of stressing about what I should eat, going on a Candida diet, and a ton of other natural remedies. At this point my anxiety was off the charts and I was attached to my parents (who live close by) to calm me down.

Not having faith in my GP anymore, I saw a Naturopath doctor (only 5 weeks after my surgery) and got a thermography test (worst decision I have made in this whole process). She explained to me I have so much brain toxicity I needed to clear, an anomalous thyroid (going from hyperthyroid to hypothyroid), minor TMJ, toxicity all in my body and list of other things. DUH! IT WAS ONLY A MONTH AFTER MY SURGERY. This freaked me out even more and made me get a TSH test to test thyroid and blood test. Everything came back normal and my GP was like, look, your MRI, CT and blood tests have all come back clear. She said I just had bacteria overgrowth on my tongue and just use mouthwash and brush my tongue. My ENT said it was a form of "geographic tongue" and mild, harmless condition. I still was convinced there was an underlying autoimmune disease.

I started Googling symptoms of this tongue non-stop (I know, this is a no-no and never ends well). This is when I started having mild constipation, abdominal pain on my left side that sometimes moved to my right side. Then it would move to my lower back on both sides, then to my shoulder sometimes for a few minutes, then my right knee for a couple days, then my neck for a few minutes. All during this time, I was convinced I had SIBO, IBS, Fibro, Lyme, Celiacs, Diverticulitis, TMJ, Sinus Infection. I bought a ton of probiotics and other natural supplements and was monitoring my dairy, caffeine, alcohol and gluten. I went to a GI doctor to take a look and he was like everything seems fine, but lets get an X-Ray and a CBC. Both came back clear.

However, I started taking the natural supplements and I was "regular" again (TMI, I know), my tongue looked like it was starting to get better and the headaches/head pressure pain was starting to lessen.

This was until about a month ago where it all started again. My tongue started getting better and worse, off an on, my sleeping patterns have been up and down, I have this intense sinus pressure that turns into pain that has now turned into chronic tension/migraine headaches and random flare-ups of abdominal pain. Everyone kept saying allergies, allergies, allergies, which have been terrible this year, so I saw an allergist this past week. I tested high in all of the "normal" allergies - high in tree pollen, ragweed and dustmites. He told me he was not convinced I have a sinus infection as I am breathing fine, my nose and ears looked good and have no thick greenish discharge, but he could see my post-nasal drip and just said keep using fluonase. He also has no idea about my tongue.

I walked out of there almost in tears, because I still had no answers to this constant head pressure/pain. I then got myself together the next day, but still have been having this headache/migraine everyday for the past week and it has sparked heightened anxiety/obsessive thoughts about it.

I read about Dr. Sarno through a random internet search, read reviews about the book and Amazon and finally decided to give this a shot. The final straw was me going to a concert on Friday (my favorite thing to do) and I had to leave halfway through due to a Migraine. I was sad and PISSED.

Yesterday I wrote a 3 page journal entry of all my built up anger/reasons why I think I am subconsciously raging and read it back to myself and started crying. I cannot tell you the last time I actually cried, but it felt good.

Today I was having the tension headache/early signs of Migraine today and talked to my dad of everything I had pent up for hours. We NEVER do this, but he was great. Talks of family issues, questioning sexuality, feeling asexual, dating, pissed about randomly developing anxiety and not being able to relax anymore, fight or flight, expectations I felt they had of me vs. my brothers and everything. The headache lessened but it was still there. We then went to family dinner and the headache wouldn't subside no matter how much I was telling it I know this is my mind trying to trick me now that the anxiety I had today went away. It's a pattern, if I have anxiety I have no headache and when I have a headache, I have no anxiety.

I got home and I started getting nauseous like I was going to throw up and now as I sit here and type this, the Migraine is still here on the left side of my forehead above my left eye and the annoying post-nasal drip is acting up.

However, I refused to let it win from me journaling or posting here. I know it's my mind trying to get me to focus on something else after I basically emptied all of my demons/rage out the past two days. I'm tired of my headaches or lack of headache dictating my mood.

So here I am, desperate to accept my condition and move forward with my life. I don't even want to say I want my "old" life back, because I want to move forward. I keep saying to myself, this has to be happening for a reason and will change me forever and the way I interact with others.

Please, any advice you have for me, please let me know! I am brand spanking new to all of this, so every bit of help from those of you who have healed yourself is helpful (or those of you going through the same thing).