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Alan has completed the new Pain Recovery Program. To read or share it, use this updated link: https://www.tmswiki.org/forum/painrecovery/Dismiss Notice
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My Story
Hello everyone,I'm employed full-time, married with three children, eldest is six years old. And two days ago (26 March 2012) I started a new period of absence from work on medical grounds. I can't speak properly. I used to be able to. I use my voice a lot for work. I contact people across our networks looking at where we can better operate, who we can support and who can support us. Now my voice sounds like someone is standing on my throat. I've been diagnosed with dysphonia and been 'scoped' three times - they put a camera up the nose and down the throat. Most unpleasant. The result of all this is that not only is there nothing visibly wrong with my throat inside or out I have, apparently, particularly healthy tissue in my larynx. But the muscle groups are "not functioning correctly". The condition first raised its ugly head maybe three years ago. Over the last twelve months it has become severe. I was at my wits end when my wife bumped into an old friend. On hearing about my condition she recommended Dr Sarno's work which she found helped her then chronic back problem. Thank the grace of nature for that serendipitous occasion. Now I've almost finished Dr Sarno's book 'The Mindbody Prescription'. And I see me on almost every page. I'd tried osteopathy and homeopathy both of which have helped in the past with my back pain now avail to nought. I've had speech/voice therapy and am now seeing my third voice therapist who is excellent and we are starting to make some progress not least because she is aware of mindbody and encouraged me to read Peter Levine's 'Waking the Tiger' which I then noticed a link to on the TMSwiki so I downloaded a copy and am reading it finding it an excellent companion to Dr Sarno's work. My Dad was an alcoholic. He was very critical, very shouty and very ill for many years. I'm not going in to the details here and now but it was a frightening time for me from about 4 or 5 yrs of age and the fear only lessened after I was maybe 12 or 13 yrs of age.Very recently my voice has been improving though only in very short bursts but a significant if shaky step that I hope shows I'm on the road to recovery. And I put the movement in my situation down to my realisation that I have TMS. I think I'm a typical TMS person. A goodist. A perfectionist who sets the bar very high and won't easily give up. Even when and, thinking about it, especially not when it hurts. Any pain, pressure or sacrifice simply urges me on. I've had problems in the past with my back. I have a disc prolapse with additional complications and I healed over some years with the help of homeopathy, shiatsu and osteopathy. I have been virtually pain free for many years. Now though, when I try to talk my throat constricts and I struggle to make a sound.Clearly I hadn't heard my unconscious mind asking, screaming for help. I'm very slowly working my way through the structured program. It's taken most of March to get to day 9.I can see that my trauma dates back to childhood when I lived with an alcoholic parent who was extremely overbearing and prone to extreme temper tantrums. Now I'm on a few weeks leave from work I'm focussing on reading, journaling and meditating and listening to music as I pass through this journey of pain, resentment, fear and rage. It's the fear that I find is now quite a prominent feature in my thoughts. My confidence is all shot and I seem to be permanently frightened to a greater or lesser extent about almost everything possible and some impossible stuff too. I've started gardening, getting back to earth, quite literally and making music of a sort on my computer. I'm going to leave it at that for now. I'm feeling drained today. I do want to add that the TMSwiki and forum have been a tremendous discovery for me. I am so very grateful to you all for your sharing and support. It's helping me so much. Cheers, Jake - Loading...
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My Story
Hello everyone,I'm employed full-time, married with three children, eldest is six years old. And two days ago (26 March 2012) I started a new period of absence from work on medical grounds. I can't speak properly. I used to be able to. I use my voice a lot for work. I contact people across our networks looking at where we can better operate, who we can support and who can support us. Now my voice sounds like someone is standing on my throat. I've been diagnosed with dysphonia and been 'scoped' three times - they put a camera up the nose and down the throat. Most unpleasant. The result of all this is that not only is there nothing visibly wrong with my throat inside or out I have, apparently, particularly healthy tissue in my larynx. But the muscle groups are "not functioning correctly". The condition first raised its ugly head maybe three years ago. Over the last twelve months it has become severe. I was at my wits end when my wife bumped into an old friend. On hearing about my condition she recommended Dr Sarno's work which she found helped her then chronic back problem. Thank the grace of nature for that serendipitous occasion. Now I've almost finished Dr Sarno's book 'The Mindbody Prescription'. And I see me on almost every page. I'd tried osteopathy and homeopathy both of which have helped in the past with my back pain now avail to nought. I've had speech/voice therapy and am now seeing my third voice therapist who is excellent and we are starting to make some progress not least because she is aware of mindbody and encouraged me to read Peter Levine's 'Waking the Tiger' which I then noticed a link to on the TMSwiki so I downloaded a copy and am reading it finding it an excellent companion to Dr Sarno's work. My Dad was an alcoholic. He was very critical, very shouty and very ill for many years. I'm not going in to the details here and now but it was a frightening time for me from about 4 or 5 yrs of age and the fear only lessened after I was maybe 12 or 13 yrs of age.Very recently my voice has been improving though only in very short bursts but a significant if shaky step that I hope shows I'm on the road to recovery. And I put the movement in my situation down to my realisation that I have TMS. I think I'm a typical TMS person. A goodist. A perfectionist who sets the bar very high and won't easily give up. Even when and, thinking about it, especially not when it hurts. Any pain, pressure or sacrifice simply urges me on. I've had problems in the past with my back. I have a disc prolapse with additional complications and I healed over some years with the help of homeopathy, shiatsu and osteopathy. I have been virtually pain free for many years. Now though, when I try to talk my throat constricts and I struggle to make a sound.Clearly I hadn't heard my unconscious mind asking, screaming for help. I'm very slowly working my way through the structured program. It's taken most of March to get to day 9.I can see that my trauma dates back to childhood when I lived with an alcoholic parent who was extremely overbearing and prone to extreme temper tantrums. Now I'm on a few weeks leave from work I'm focussing on reading, journaling and meditating and listening to music as I pass through this journey of pain, resentment, fear and rage. It's the fear that I find is now quite a prominent feature in my thoughts. My confidence is all shot and I seem to be permanently frightened to a greater or lesser extent about almost everything possible and some impossible stuff too. I've started gardening, getting back to earth, quite literally and making music of a sort on my computer. I'm going to leave it at that for now. I'm feeling drained today. I do want to add that the TMSwiki and forum have been a tremendous discovery for me. I am so very grateful to you all for your sharing and support. It's helping me so much. Cheers, JakeInteract
