Day 5 A Much Better Day

Today was much better. I woke up feeling a bit anxious this morning, but slept a lot better than I have the past week. Had a dream that I asked this random girl I know and haven't seen in forever for her number because she said she was newly single, which I thought was interesting. I also decided to do a quick 15 minute meditation on top of my bed before I got going and it felt good.

Work went much better than yesterday, barely any head pressure and no anxiety. I did notice however that my ear crackling, minor TMJ and dizziness/unbalanced walking came back at times today. I almost started falling into the trap of "googling" for answers but then caught myself and reminded myself I'm healthy and fine and it's probably just allergies. I still can't seem to get past this chronic post-nasal drip however.

I went for a run outside and was still feeling a bit off balanced still, but powered through and still had a good run. Randomly during my run, I started having flashbacks (almost felt like a montage in a TV show) of all the times I ever got really upset or hurt in my life from a kid all the way to adult. Didn't know what to make of it, but I just moved on.

Sometimes when I'm deep in thought, and this has been going on forever even before the pain, my mind randomly writes song lyrics. Today I wrote.

"So pull all my skeletons out tonight
I'm already a bag of bones that
Thought I lost the fight to my mind
Because I'm too kind
Too "i'm fine"
Too good at "goodist" crimes
Gonna be alright though
On my way to shined and refined"

That's all I got today.