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A new thing

Discussion in 'Support Subforum' started by dlane2530, Sep 1, 2025.

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  1. dlane2530

    dlane2530 Well known member

    Ugh. Shoulder pain. Didn't do anything to it, no injury. Just intense, intense pain. That is not always present.

    We know what this is, ladies and gentlemen!

    Why is it always so hard to believe?
     
    Last edited: Sep 1, 2025
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  2. JanAtheCPA

    JanAtheCPA Beloved Grand Eagle

    Yeah, I get this. It feels like descriptions of bursitis - a combination of burning and shooting pain? The annoying thing is that it will start bugging me during the day, and then flare badly late in the evening, so that maneuvering into and in bed is quite agonizing. I'm mostly a side sleeper but I change positions frequently during the night, which is really breath-takingly unpleasant with this screaming shoulder pain - whichever random side it decides to manifest on.

    My standard response to obvious TMS BS like this is to assume it's temporary and that there's no reason it can't go away overnight just as quickly as it came on. Which is what happens, typically with some residual but very manageable soreness the next day which is gone by the time about 24 hours have passed. For me, these things tend to happen when I've experienced a recent stressor that I've failed to acknowledge, so there's always some self-examination going on in my head at the same time.

    But here's a funny thing - a couple of incidents ago, which is now several months ago, shortly after I'd gone to bed, I really, really wanted to lie on the side that was painful. Knowing rationally that there was no physiological reason for the pain, I decided to just see what would happen - which took some doing and some gritting of my teeth - and I was really surprised at how good it felt to lie on that side. Once I eased into it, with my arm and shoulder firmly under me, there was less pain than when I'd been lying neutrally on my back. In fact, there was virtually no pain. It's as if it just said "F-it" and gave up. When I naturally woke up and shifted around during the next sleep cycle, the pain on moving around was already almost gone. The next time this particular pain happened which was, I don't know, at least six weeks ago, I did this again and had the same experience.

    YMMV.

    I guess the main takeaway is that it's a two-part process: there's an unconscious trigger which might be very helpful to reveal, and there's an unconscious physical response along with equally-unconscious assumptions about that response, which almost certainly need to be challenged.
     
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  3. dlane2530

    dlane2530 Well known member

    This is super-helpful, @JanAtheCPA . Thank you for the solidarity, example, and reminders. You're right that it just screams with pain! I've been reminding myself of other screaming pain in recent weeks that was just TMS -- particularly ear pain.
    Thinking about the stress and the rage (so often for me it's a feeling of being trapped) will make it recede for a bit and then when I remember the pain it'll come back. But all the hallmarks of TMS: no injury, comes and goes, moves around, sometimes both sides, sometimes one.
    I'll try paying attention to what my body craves with it in terms of movement. That's a good tip. There's definitely an unconscious movement to cradle and freeze the arm and hunch the shoulder, which is the opposite of what ought to happen.
     
  4. Diana-M

    Diana-M Beloved Grand Eagle

    Dixie,
    Shoulders are one of the utmost common TMS locations. I can’t remember exactly where, but Sarno mentions that in all of his books multiple times. Every once in a while, I get a shoulder pain on top of everything else. For me personally, I refuse to believe it’s anything, so it usually goes away fast (unlike all my other stuff!) What in the world are our TMS brains trying to protect us from feeling? Maybe there’s even something new added to your load?

    I hope you feel better soon! ❤️
     
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  5. BloodMoon

    BloodMoon Beloved Grand Eagle

    Just a thought, but if I were a betting woman I'd wager it may be connected to what you wrote about in another thread ---- where you were saying about driving a smaller car that you don't like and having your routine majorly disrupted because of needing to drive your husband to and from work (unless of course you've actually remedied that in some way or other to your brain's satisfaction).
     
    Last edited: Sep 2, 2025
  6. dlane2530

    dlane2530 Well known member

    Thank you, Diana! I just pulled out one of Sarno's book and reread his section on neck and shoulder pain. Thanks. I think @BloodMoon is right, above -- it's related to the driving.
     
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  7. dlane2530

    dlane2530 Well known member

    I think you are right!
     
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  8. dlane2530

    dlane2530 Well known member

    Also, I was holding babies for acquaintances the past few days and it really tired my arm out. But also, I didn't really want to be there with those people, and I didn't really want to hold the babies (I mean, I love babies, but I was exhausted). So I think that probably contributed to the arm and shoulder pain...having to do something with my body that was uncomfortable when I really just wanted to rest and didn't want to be social. I can see why the TMS would settle in that spot for a while.
     
  9. BloodMoon

    BloodMoon Beloved Grand Eagle

    Sounds like a 'perfect storm'... the driving plus holding the babies. Now you've worked it all out, your 'lizard' brain should let go and "for a while" will be over soon. This kind of thing happens to me all the time due to needing to or feeling obliged to do things that I don't really want to do.
     
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  10. dlane2530

    dlane2530 Well known member

    Thank you for the encouragement!!! It means a lot.
    I ended up writing an essay about it, too -- holding a baby for someone because no one else would offer. This mom was alone with 3 small kids, a baby, and grandma in a wheelchair. No one offering to push the wheelchair, no one helping with the baby.
    One thing that happened too was that a mom showed up alone at church this Sunday with a baby and a toddler and no one offered her a seat. I gave her mine but I was pissed that none of the young single people or more mature men offered. So, then I was seething about how tired and hurting I was and why did I have to stand. Which isn't an admirable way to feel but there you have it.
    When people don't notice each other's needs, the hurting end up helping the hurting...and I was also making the mistake of thinking of myself as weak/fragile/hurting!
     
    Last edited: Sep 2, 2025
  11. dlane2530

    dlane2530 Well known member

    I will allow myself to say here just that THIS STUFF MAKES ME MAD!!!
     
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  12. Diana-M

    Diana-M Beloved Grand Eagle

    It would make me mad too! :arghh: What is wrong with people?!
     
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  13. BloodMoon

    BloodMoon Beloved Grand Eagle

    ... yes, but I wouldn't beat yourself up about that; you don't need to be perfect in your responses to 'lifey' stuff. Because TMS symptoms are very real, it's very hard to respond in a text book Sarno way to every situation. Every thing you do during your day to get on with everyday life, despite whatever TMS symptoms you are experiencing, is a small but significant victory towards recovery/losing those symptoms.
     
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  14. dlane2530

    dlane2530 Well known member

    This is such a helpful reminder. Thank you.
     
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  15. dlane2530

    dlane2530 Well known member

    You guys were right about all of this.
     
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  16. Baseball65

    Baseball65 Beloved Grand Eagle

    I do a very similar thing with any 'side' specific TMS. I used to sleep face down a lot. Then TMS came and I stopped. Then I read Sarno and I MADE myself sleep face down. Just for the sake of knowing it's BS.
    I did what Jan said here, But I also make sure I am meditating on my personal problems and ANGERs while doing it. I will conjure up the deepest awareness I have achieved in writing and visualize it. This is NOT fun. I would much rather read a book. But as Jan implies, it also is the quickest way to decondition a new TMS symptom.

    I actually sleep in an impossible position to read at night. It hurts my otherwise pain free shoulder, but I like it. I realized last night as my arm fell asleep for the thousandth time , it is only because of which way the nightstand light faces and I am lazy.


    Some of my Bro's who read Sarno and got pain free came down with this as their second symptom. They told me "Hey man...this time it is 'REAL'..."

    I assume they meant that their back pain wasn't?

    When mine came I blamed it on Baseball. Then when I discovered it was TMS, I actually THREW my way to freedom, just like the sleeping thing. It felt like there was an ice pick in there every time I lifted my Arm past 90*....so I threw the longest batting practice I'd ever thrown focusing on things that were Making me angry (Like being a coach rather than a player!)
    It went away in that ONE LO-OOONG batting practice after bugging me for 10 days.

    Completely counter intuitive to the 'Be careful, take it easy' crap my Doctor was telling me

    It was the first thing after my back pain that made me seek a Dr. . And my quick recovery was just another lesson of how sneaky TMS can be
     
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  17. BloodMoon

    BloodMoon Beloved Grand Eagle

    Funnily (not ha ha) enough, I recently got some 'new' pains... shoulder, ankle, toes and wrist... and with each one I've taken to saying to my brain in response, "don't be so bloody ridiculous!" and then carrying on best I can regardless, repeating to myself "it's ridiculous" a number of times, and within a few hours they've either gone or faded, and certainly by the next day disappeared. I'm now experimenting with saying the same thing to my brain in response to my 'old' chronic pains and discomfort as I encounter them, what with my lizard brain responding remarkably well to me pointing out the absurdity of it all with 'new' symptoms. Seems, from my experience anyway, that if you follow Dr Sarno's advice to talk to your brain, you might need to find the word or words that 'hit home' with your particular brain... so it's likely to be worth experimenting.
     
    Last edited: Sep 4, 2025
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  18. Diana-M

    Diana-M Beloved Grand Eagle

    This is great news!
     
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  19. dlane2530

    dlane2530 Well known member

    Yes, it's up and down with this now, but I can tell it's just BS. Keep saying it over and over and also trying to allow the emotions.
    @Baseball65 I have been working on sleeping positions, and every once in a while now I succeed in sleeping without all my pillows and on my stomach. Other nights I just can't and I let myself use whatever props I need to get some sleep. But little by little, there's more success. I tell myself, "All positions are safe."
     
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