Day 2 Anger and sadness

Wow, I knew I had this feeling where I wanted to scream but no immediate reason why since emotions are so buried.

So I started writing my 3 things I am angry at and realized as I wrote down many more than 3 I am angry at a lot! Mostly at myself for not meeting up to my own standards.

Our reading started by saying TMS summarized by us having a fear of not being good enough. I would say that is my top fear that came from early childhood.

 

Me too ,day 2. Me too, perfectionist. I don't know where to start. I could write 3 things just in my line of sight that make me fell angry or sad. Our "standards" could be part of the issue however. Who knows how much and at what point in our development our standards became enmeshed with our parents standards. I think this work will help sort this out for me. My childhood could be defined as "lost in the mix. I was small, quite, and my mom was over raising kids at that point(4 older sibs) I was babysat for a lot. They even forgot me at a movie theater and PRETENDED to forget me at a gas station once! I'm sure I was scared both times( I have almost no childhood memories). That lead to my selfishness and little Neapolitan nature, and perhaps my boundless enrgy...until I crash when my back pain catches up with me. Then I'm a weeping pile of "why me". Until 3 nights ago when I remembered the name "Dr John Sarno"! I swear, my low back pain has been cut in half already. After night one! Anyways sorry for hijacking your post. Here's to day 3!

 

Same here, I have very few memories and they are not happy ones. I was left alone and ignored as the quiet, good child and my brother who had problems got all the attention.

Always blew me away after all that happened with me and him that he ended up married to a great lady and doing well financially while I have had relationship problems..on marriage 3 now and struggled most of my life with money. It comes around though neither of his adult kids speak to him and he is a very angry guy.

At least I have a good relationship with both my adult kids.

 

Marla, then you are the lucky one. Your brother got all the attention and you were ignored,
but you have survived relationship problems in two earlier marriages. You've learned how to
love and be loved. Enjoy your adult kids and nurture your third marriage. Love and patience will help.