Day 1 Back again for the 3rd time

Hi all,
I am going to start positive - this forum has been incredibly helpful to me during my previous two go-rounds with TMS pain and I'm confident that it will help me again. I really enjoy reading everyones' posts and feel so honored to be able to witness and share with you all. So THANK YOU for just being here.
On to the nitty gritty - I'm so angry that I've let myself get to this place again. I pushed pushed pushed myself for the last 7 months and now I'm paying for it with back pain. Will I ever learn or am I cursed to keep being myself- goodist, perfectionist, avoidant?
I know that this is just TMS and I'm not going to let it suck me down, but it's hard to find the balance of being kind to myself and being open to my emotions. My emotions all seem to be negative.
UGH here we go again.
And again this program works and I'm beyond grateful to have it (and you all) here for me as I face it all.

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