Confused on some things

Hello, I’m a 32 year-old man with 4 bulging discs and pretty bad Stenosis. For the last six years, I’ve had extremely bad pain in my lower back.

most of my time is spent lying down, or walking. I can’t sit for more than 10 minutes, pain starts creeping from my back down my right leg.

I have tried a lot of physical therapy, losing a ton of weight, chiropractor with traction, And nothing has really helped.

I have been sitting at a desk for the majority of my life, And I always thought that the pain had to have just come from bad posture. I read healing back pain by Sarno, And I’m convinced that my pain is being caused by TMS. The only thing that is hanging me up is in the healing page says that “my back is basically normal.”

Surely, bad stenosis and four bulging discs isn’t normal? I’ve also been told by surgeons that my spine has weird abnormal shapes that could be pinching a nerve further.

Another part of the book that confuses me as he says that nerves being pushed on will quickly turn themselves off. But my pain only starts when I sit down or bend forward, Doesn’t that make sense that it’s not being pushed all the time? Standing up and down, the pain goes away.

another thing I don’t really get is he said when in pain, think of emotional issues. So think of things that upset me?

I guess my main actual question I want to ask right now is he says to get back to all normal activity. I work at a desk. Does this literally mean sitting down for hours at a time in agonizing pain and consistently telling yourself that it is just TMS? I also can’t stand still for too long. I can’t imagine doing this for weeks. I do all of the things that the book tells me, but the pain is still powerful.

i lie down to avoid the pain. The book says not to do anything that triggers in the brain that you don’t believe in the program. I can’t lie down?

I find it extremely difficult to focus on any emotional problem while the pain is so strong. Does anyone have advice for me?

 

Hi Stanley,

I don't have an advice for you but...I would suggest this: just take a piece of paper and a pen and write on it your emotional problems. Your stressors. What is bothering you. What makes you angry. Depressed. Sad. Desperate. Something, anything. Just do this exercise and see how you feel after it. Do a huge effort and for 10 minutes forget about the pain and put your mind into this exercise.

Take care.

 

Stanley,
I’d first like to mention that your user name is personally identifying you as a diagnoses. Mentally, that can really become a sticking point for healing. You are not your diagnoses.
My MRI looks a hot mess. Luckily a neurosurgeon said none of the visuals -bulging discs, vertebrae, etc are abnormal at all. Most people have them by age 25 and most people have no chronic pain from them. This comment was so in line with Dr. Sarno (who the surgeon had not heard of) I forged ahead with TMS and have never gone back to the Dr. I’m not pain free yet but I sure feel better!
You need to read Nichole Sach’s story and check out Dr. Hanscom’s Back In Control (retired spine surgeon who also has TMS) website.
I was basically bed bound for two years. Some days I rest, usually in meditation but I can sit (I could not sit for a year!), stand (work days require me to stand at least 6 hours on cement floors) and walk a few miles and do many chores. It’s still challenging but I’m doing so many wonderful things and doing it without mental suffering. Once the mental suffering subsided I could concentrate even in pain.
You need to learn to tolerate the uncomfortable to move forward, and be able to do it with the mindset of recognizing that the physical pain is simply the side effect of the inner mental and emotional aspect of your life, and nothing more. Begin focusing on the main points Dr. Sarno outlines (if you haven’t read one of his books). Allen Gordon focuses less on the mental/emotional and it’s a crucial component. Personality, mindset, emotional habits are the things that create TMS…how we view ourselves and the inner anger and rage (among other “negative” emotions we harbor and are unaware of… the stress! Not just external stress but the internal stress we generate. Part of the healing is beginning to move more.
Just more. Whatever it is, whatever that means, just start, and read Sarno and begin doing the work he outlines.
After reading Sarno you might want to try the free Structured Educational Program you can find at TMSwiki.org
Just do a bit each day. At first I had to divide the days in two because I couldn’t focus.. that’s ok. Just begin.

 

Hey Stanley,

I had the same issue when I started, the “pain” (cfs -tiredness) was so bad that at some point it wasn’t an option anymore to continue. Besides that, my attitude became one of “I have to push through this!” With lots of willpower involved.
After a few weeks of pushing and pushing I couldn’t do it anymore and my symptoms were flaring.

now I have decided I will take it easier and remember something I’ve read from Alan Gordon. He said something like if you’re too tired, go lay down, it’s no problem at all. But that the stress we’re adding (thinking the program isn’t working, we never gonna get rid of this etc) is the culprit.

I try to think as little as possible about my symptoms. If I really want to rest, I will, and I try to be very kind to myself. This is a totally different mindset to the one of pushing through, and I think it’s working better

 

Thank you guys for the replies.

Just to be clear, The program says to get back to full physical activity, And it also says to not really do anything that tells your brain that your back is in pain. So am I allowed to lift heavy weights like I used to?

Should I avoid taking painkillers altogether?

I started acupuncture before finding out about this program, I didn’t really believe acupuncture would solve my problems anyway but should I stop going to it since it has something to do with back pain? I need to get out of that mindset right or is it OK to go and think about it like it’s just something that makes me feel good In general?

thanks for helping me.

 

Stanley,
Have you heard of Dan Buglio? He has daily videos on healing TMS. Look him up on YouTube. I think he would help you a lot.

 

I think when you read and listen more about brain-pain you'll get a bigger and more nuanced picture.
I'd recommend Alan Gordon, since I feel he has a more nuanced approach to the whole "resume normal activity" thing.
And maybe Steve Ozanich's Great Pain Deception if you want an example of someone who thought he and his back where completely broken and found his own way through.

I get that it can feel very scary to treat your back as normal, and maybe this isn't the best approach for you.
there are articles on "how to know your pain is TMS". The exercise where you build your list of evidence from the structured educational program could be a very good one. Just to get some more evidence and become more secure in your suspicions. Maybe you know rationally it's TMS, usually there are other parts of yourself that still need some convincing.
But keep in mind that IF your pain is TMS, you can treat your back as a normal back, and lift weight (keeping in mind your level of anxiety about it). But since no-one here knows for sure your pain is TMS, it'd be better to experiment with taking baby-steps instead of starting to lift weights. Also the anxiety that would come with that would probably be a lot, so the pain would probably be through the roof.

The approach to take can be very personalised
even for me, I take a lot of different approaches.

- For my joint pain, I can just KNOW its TMS and stomp right through that pain and BAM it's gone. I fixed my years long wrist, knees and feet problems this way. it's awesome.
-For my CFS tiredness, I tried this approach, it made me SO, SO exhausted and the discipline it took was just too much. I'm resting more now but try to give it zero thought, while finding out more about where my anxiety is coming from. So more an Alan Gordon approach.
-For my Tinnitus, I try to "Steve O" that shit, (Steve Ozanich, he did a whole lot of sitting through pain) and I won't put on background noise, because I "won't let it win".
-For my headaches, when I feel them coming on I try to see it as an opportunity to talk calmly to myself, and work with the pain. Yesterday was the first time I could go without painkillers, because I could talk myself through it! If the pain is not funny anymore however, I'll definitely take painkillers. I did my work of calming myself, and now I am doing what I need to do to keep myself calm, diminishing the pain. (and damn am I grateful for painkillers)

so even for one person, different approaches can work. The number one rule I think is how you feel while you are doing it.
if you are sitting through pain do you feel miserable, or empowered
if you are resting, do you feel calm, or defeated
if you are taking painkillers do you feel anxiety because you're ruining the TMS program, or do you view it as a nice thing you do for yourself because you're tired of the pain.

I really hope you'll find the way through because it can be very empowering!

 

I very much appreciate all the advice guys, I will look into all of this.

 

Yay, @StrappingStanley !