Day 1 Day 1 for the second time

Well, I'm back. After more than a year of very little neck pain following my work in the Structured Educational Program, it has come roaring back in.

I know exactly why my neck feels like it's on fire again - I'm stressed as hell, angry and anxious. I have 2 kids now that I'm struggling to parent, one of which who is probably going to turn out to be on the autism spectrum. My job is draining, and most of the co-workers I got along well with have left. My in-laws have been living with us for months, and they try not to impose but it's not a big enough place for 4 people and 2 kids. I don't have any time for myself, I don't exercise at all anymore and i haven't seen my friends in a long time.

I know that the neck pain is caused by my mind. I know it's trying to distract me from the deep rage and stress I'm feeling because of the situation I'm in. I know this, and I'm hopeful going through the program again and rereading Healing Back Pain will work like it did before. I'm hopeful, but I've been putting this off because there's a part of me that's worried it won't work this time.

I remember reading a story on this forum from a guy who had his pain come back. He tried doing all the stuff he did before but none of it worked. He journaled for hours a day but it didn't help like it had before. I'm worried that I'm going to be that guy. I wonder if he ever got his brain to stop torturing him.

Thanks for listening.

 

Hey Mitchell, I hear you. Life is tough sometimes. You seem to be so self-aware. That's the first step in healing. Try and find positive ways to express you rage, remind yourself your pain is YOU trying to mask the rage you feel inside. Take measures to TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF amidst the chaos in your life. One day at a time and be easy on yourself. You deserve a pain-free life and you seem to know what your triggers are. You're already on the path to healing.