Day 1 where I am at

Hi:
I’ve been here a lot on TMSWiki.
I’m starting the SEP again, with commitment.
My excuse in the past was that links to some of the readings (google books) don’t work on my devices.
This time I want to forge ahead without excuses.
I believe I have TMS plus a postural issue. I have a hard time committing 100% to TMS. Even if I saw a TMS Dr, I found a unique method physical therapy that explains many of my symptoms. I am going to see a practitioner for this in a few weeks. But my mindset needs to change.
He can not fix my personality or emotional issues I have avoided by overthinking and “problem solving”.
I had gotten some better a few months ago but I am an avoider, and stopped doing much of the work I was trying to do (substituted with just thinking it), and could not get my head into the emotional stuff. I started emotional digging, haphazardly with a psychologist and symptoms flared.
I am afraid of this work, afraid of symptoms. Afraid of everything.
I am probably angry too. I’m just beginning to dip into anger.
I want to commit to this work. I want out.

 

The emotions let out by the work can definitely be scary . . . but it truly does feel better after "purging" those feelings. The SEP is a great way to keep yourself on track if you can make it a habit. If there are any documents you can't access, feel free to message me or post on the forum. somebody can probably dig up a pdf copy or something. Good luck!