Day 1

I came across TMS and John Sarno’s books about a week and a half ago. I read Healing back pain, and have listened to a few podcast and youtube videos. I started The Mind Body workbook but had a hard time getting into the questions and writing. I was able to do a little better with JournalSpeak as Nicole Sachs has termed it but also have fallen short on more things to journal about. My TMS journey is fairly new, it started in September with left foot pain. I am a dedicated recreational runner and ran a marathon in the beginning of Aeptember. I did not take time off, literally ran 7 miles the next day, and then 10 the day after (I am sure this says something about my personality). I began to have foot pain, I contributed it to overuse. I took a few days off, the pain did not improve, I became depressed not being able to run, one of my stress outlets. I went to a Podiatrist, has xray, bone scan, wore a boot for a few weeks. Soon after I started having right foot pain. The podiatrist thought it might be a neuroma, had a steroid injection. All in all none of the treatments were helping. Went to a chiropractor that does myofascial release which helped some but in the end even he was surprised in my lack of improvement. My anxiety was all this time continuing to increase, at one point I was convinced I had Multiple sclerosis because I began to have numbness and tingling in the foot/leg. Long story short after an MRI, EMG and nerve conduction test which were all essentially normal I started to google psychosomatic symptoms and came across John Sarnos work. I do think my pain has improved, I am back to running. I am trying to ignore the pain. However I am still caught up in the fear. I also keep trying to go back through my childhood, adult life and find what I am repressing. I am certainly anxious, and a people- pleaser, I can appreciate my unconscious anger for putting my feelings or ideas a side to please others. But I keep thinking there is some deeper thing I am missing. Some key pivotal moment that is going to be my Ah-ha. I am thankful for finding this page and hope to keep improving and work through my TMS journey.