Day 1 Day 1

Hi everyone, I am on day one of the SEP per Bruce's suggestion. I generally repel away from anything structured, but here I am anyway, willing to learn and ready to go. I have had a sore back for 2 years. I have also had a sore throat for 7 years, and yes, it generally gets worse when I am nervous. I have a background in the healing industry, but I think I was on a hiatus for a while, a real learning curve. I was getting tired of calling my friends and sister who know healing techniques. I think I needed to figure it out myself.

I did all the things I was "supposed" to do, physio, chiro, massage therapy. Which is really unlike me. I took a lot of convincing for me to start each of those modalities. At any rate, I still view them as movement when I wasn't really moving in any way. I have stopped doing all of those modalities by mid-March.

I discovered Sarno February 28 and got my copy of the book March 3. I had a particularly sore back in the month of February so I was watching a lot of youtube videos when I found Dr. Sarno's 20/20 show. No drugs, I'm in. I yelled in the pillow a lot in the last month and a half. It's funny, I used to yell into the pillow in the early 2000's but for some reason I quite. So I started up again. I also started "journaling" recently or as I like to call it "spewing". I am still confused about "soothing", how to find it and how to be kind to myself. I am working on that.

My back is about 80% better, and sometimes maybe 90% better. I am working on my sore throat, which seems to be more subtle, perhaps older and more ingrained. I am all in regarding the tms program. Although there are times I don't really get it at all.

I am genuinely excited about knowing a technique where people can help themselves on a moment to moment basis.

 

Welcome to the SEP and the forum. I've been helped soooo much through this program. Looking forward to hearing more from you!

 

Welcome aboard, I agree -- learning for yourself and then becoming aware of your reactions will be most beneficial to your knowledge penicillin. It doesn't matter how long you have had the pain, the conditioning is there. You just need recondition with all you learn here and the SEP is a great way to get you taught. Be kind to yourself now and learn slowly. Take it easy and relax -- Hold onto your joy and let the worry flow away. Learn to be free of constant worry and fear and you will soon begin to feel a lot more better and more in control.

You won't have to exercise here less its just for breathing better and heart and muscle benefits cause mostly the exercise isn't what heals. It's taking control over your thoughts that does most the healing. You just learn awareness and acceptance and go from there.

Soothing is meditation and relaxing -- Calming your mind and just being with no thoughts on anything except your breathe. No judgments or criticisms toward any act you do. Self compassion is like to say even though I have this pain, I still calmly, completely and fully love myself, Then repeat till you start to feel self love.

Well I'm glad your doing much better. When your happy, your bodies happy and then you get better. You have to get a hold of some thoughts of happiness and then go and enjoy the sun for a day or two a week. All in all Tms healing is about getting back connected to life.

Here you would do great to check out these two threads -http://www.tmswiki.org/forum/threads/reminder-6-nothing-to-fear.2348/

Here is just some of Claire's Wisdom -- these are some of her most famous tools

Dos and Don’ts
1. Do not run away from fear. Analyze it and see it as no more then physical feelings. Feelings are not facts, do not be bluffed.
2. Accept all strange sensations connected with your illness. Do not
fight them. Float past them. Recognize that they are temporary.
3. Let there be no self-pity.
4. Settle your problems as quickly as you can, if not with action, then by glimpsing and accepting a new point of view.
5. Waste no time on “What might have been” and “If only…”
6. Face sorrow and know that time will bring relief.
7. Be occupied. Do not lie in bed brooding. Be occupied calmly , not feverishly trying to forget yourself.
8. Remember that the strength in a muscle may depend on the confidence with which it is used.
9. Accept your obsessions and be prepared to live with them
temporarily. Do not fight them by trying to push them away. Let time do
that.
10. Remember your recovery does not necessarily depend “entirely on
you” as so many people are so ready to tell you. You may need help.
Accept it willingly, without shame.
11. Do not measure your progress day by day. Don’t count the months,
years you have been ill and despair at the thought of them. Once you
are on the right road to recovery, recovery is inevitable, however
protracted your illness may have been.
12. Remember withdrawal is your jailer. Recovery lies on the other side of panic. Recovery lies in places you fear.
13. Do not be discouraged if you cannot make decisions while you are ill. When you are well, decisions will be more easily made.
14. Never accept total defeat. It is never too late to give yourself another chance.
15. Practice don’t test.
16. Face. Accept. Float. Let time pass.
If you do this, you WILL recover.

I want to say what facing is where you know your about to have anxiety or a pain episode right. So you don't fear it, or judge it or criticize it. Wait for it to come if it must, most everyone has been taught to hate anxiety and Pain. Well the more you hate it the more it will become and the bigger it will get so you have to learn how to Float. I'd highly recommend getting her book ok.

If you would like more of Claire Weekes " Hope and Help for you Nerves " is the name of her most famous book.
Remember we face and don't fear the pain and then we accept that we can do these steps and again we don't fear the pain and then when the pain comes we let it be without judgement or criticism.

Always practice more, way more ok. And learn more tools from Lowes books and Weekes books and all you can read from that is about TMS healing ok. I got together a great list of Abraham Lowe's main quotes and tools , here is the Tools, see which ones you can use ok.

Tools List
The tools on this list are quoted or adapted from Mental Health Through Will Training (MH), Selections from Dr. Low’s Works (SEL) and Manage Your Fears, Manage Your Anger (MYF) and will help you take part in a Recovery International meeting. Many other tools can be found in these books.
Some Basic RI Tools
Treat mental health as a business and not as a game………………..…...……………MH ch.25
Humor is our best friend, temper is our worst enemy……………………………….…..MH p.108
If you can't change a situation you can change your attitude towards it...MYF p.108, Sel. p.31‐32
Be self‐led, not symptom‐led. …..………………………………………......MYF p.114‐118, 280‐283
Nervous symptoms and sensations are distressing but not dangerous…….….….. SEL p.53, MH p.115, 119
Temper is, among other things, an intellectual blindness to the other side of the story…………MH p.159
Comfort is a want, not a need. ………………………………..……………......….....MH chs.13, 22
There is no right or wrong in the trivialities of every day life………...SEL p.39, MH p.157, 195‐196
Calm begets calm, temper begets temper………………………….…...…….MYF p.245, SEL p.31
Don't take our own dear selves too seriously………………………………....………….MH p.109
Feelings should be expressed and temper suppressed…………………....……...…....MH p.178
Helplessness is not hopelessness………………………..……………….……MH ch.7, MYF p.184
Some people have a passion for self‐distrust…….…………...…..…….MH ch.29 & MYF Lecture 2
Temper maintains and intensifies symptoms………………………..…….……….……MH p. 219
Do things in part acts……………………………………………….…….……….……MH p.246‐249
Endorse yourself for the effort, not only for the performance……...…….MYF p.13, SEL p.46, 132
Have the courage to make a mistake………………..……….MH p.203, ch.30, MYF p.60, SEL p.108
Feelings are not facts……………………………...……………..………….MH ch.9, MYF Lecture 14
Do the things you fear and hate to do……………...………..…………...MH p. 329‐330, MYF p.197
Fear is a belief –– beliefs can be changed………………………………………….MYF p.266‐269
Every act of self‐control leads to a sense of self‐respect....…………….…….………..MH p.166
Decide, plan and act. ………………………….……………………………………………...MH p.42
Any decision will steady you……………………………………...……………….………...MYF p.5
Anticipation is often worse than realization….…………………..…..………….MH p.114‐115, 146
Replace an insecure thought with a secure thought……………..……….….……..MYF Lecture 1
Bear the discomfort in order to gain comfort…………………….………….…………….MH p.149
Hurt feelings are just beliefs not shared………………………………….………………..SEL p.21
Self‐appointed expectations lead to self‐induced frustrations…………….…………….SEL p.35
People do things that annoy us, not necessarily to annoy us………..…...…………….MH ch.48
Knowledge teaches you what to do, practice tells you how to do it……...……………SEL p.118
Muscles can be commanded to do what one fears to do………………………..……..SEL p.123
Tempers are frequently uncontrolled, but not uncontrollable.…………………………..MH p.392

 

Thanks Herbie for all your bits of wisdom. I will be reading Claire Weekes's books shortly. I especially liked the quote: "muscles can be commanded to do what one fears to do" as well as many other tidbits. I also enjoyed the discussion group Tuesday night.

 

Thank you so much Peggy. I enjoyed hearing your voice. You really have an open heart for all your doing.
I'm glad to have you here learning and teaching us.
I so enjoy every moment we get to share. Life is about connection and relationship.
Bless You

 

Hi Peggy,
The way I soothe myself is to speak to and treat myself like a 5 year old kid. Sometimes I visualize holding and cradling an infant me, something I ask my 5 year old what she wants or doesnt want. I tell her its ok. I tell her all is well. I croon, I rock, I soothe, I cradle. Sometimes I dance, or draw or paint, or curl up with a book. For me, soothing is all about gentle soothing self-parenting. Happy to be on this journey with you. I am on DAY 1.

 

Thanks, KTL, I do get that feeling that I want to be cradled, I have blamed my Mom for not giving me enough attention. But now I can give it to myself. I was just outside laying on my tummy on the earth imagining that Mother Earth was wrapping her arms around me. Thanks for the suggestion and good luck in your processing in the days to come.