Day 10 Day 10

Today, make a brief forum post about how you are doing with the treatment. If you still have any doubts about the TMS approach, include those in your post. If you have had an aha! moment or have found a certain technique helpful, post about that. I think I'm doing okay with the treatment so far. I wish my pain was ALL gone but I keep reminding myself that its way better than it ever has been in the last 3 years. I am getting better at noticing the feelings underneath the pain signal. Part of it is deconstructing all the limitations and fears that have built up over three years time of protecting and trying to avoid more pain. Its amazing to me how deeply embedded it is. Then I spend time realizing how deeply embedded the old thoughts/beliefs and repressed feelings are. I don't have any doubts about the TMS approach because the diminishing of pain (constant and intense) is my evidence. Last night in bed, my partner turned up the TV sound, invited the dogs up on the bed Right when I was falling asleep. I was so angry with being woken up (this is an ongoing problem) because I really needed to get to sleep for an early morning. The pain shot up in my back as I was laying there. I was able to follow the trajectory of thoughts all leading back into one of my personality traits. It was very helpful to follow it along - and being less about the inconsiderateness of my partner and more about the manifestation of low self-esteen and not communicating my needs appropriately. ps fortunately I was able to fall back asleep!

 

Yes! It is amazing how 'triggers' set off the stuff we have repressed or our personality traits. I have found how literal and instant pain can be - like horrendous back pain before seeing my mother! Luckily now I have identified the 'trigger' (mother!) it no longer happens. It is great that you have been able to see and understand this by Day 10 - you are doing great!