Day 3 Day 3

When was the last time you exercised or did another physical activity? What was this activity? How did it make you feel physically and emotionally? If it is has been a while since you last exercised, why?

The last time I exercised was back in early December. I regularly rode my bike and did Zumba. Those two activities were fun for me, they made me feel great physically (I'm trying to lose weight) and even better emotionally. I felt accomplished and happy after a good work out. I stopped working out because in early December is when my urgent urination began and I'm scared if I work out its going to cause it to get worse. My fear is interstitial cystitis and I read physical activity, can make symptoms worse so it sort of stuck in my head. So working out I think brings one more anxiety for me.


Most of today I felt great, wasn't having any problems at all, then all of sudden, my husband and I were about to take our kids to the park and I ran to the restroom real quick and came out with the feeling of needing to go again. I'm trying to tell myself that "its just TMS, relax." but I can feel my anxiety creeping right back. It's a terrible cycle! I start questioning, "how do I know it's TMS?" I just recently read about TMS a week ago and now I'm doing the program. I told myself if after the 42 days and I'm still having symptoms I will go get the tests done by my doctor (even though she doesn't think they are necessary). She didn't come out and say that it was "all in my head." But I think that is what she thought after speaking with me and checking my urine. How do you get past that "what if?" I can't seem to let that go.

 

Welcome to the forum ... you have come to a very warm and supportive place.

Exercise is always necessary. It causes our our breathing to enhance, increases the oxygen in our blood, flushes out toxins. Even with IC, it is recommended you follow an exercise program. So whether it is IC or TMS ... exercise as much as you can. Focus on the enjoyment of it.

The what if's will always drift through. Rather than latching on to them, just allow them to float right on through, nod at them, and continue with what you want to be doing. Fear is actually your greatest enemy. To face fear, you must imagine slinging on your Warrior gear, and taking up your sword. You ARE strong. Very strong. Every thing you need is already inside you. You won't get it from me, or anyone. You already have it. We will support you, comfort you, advise you ... but you will do the work, because only you can.

Believe in yourself, as we believe in you.

with grace and gratitude,
^_^

 

Thank you for your comforting words. I know I need to go back to exercising, even just walking. I worked up the courage about a week ago but the very next day my urinary symptoms showed back up and I blamed in on the work out. :/

I was feeling really positive and good since starting the program, the first 2 days I felt great with no symptoms, then yesterday I had some and it got me back in my panic.

 

It is our nature to find something or someone to 'blame'. We want a reason for our misery. A person who is injured in a natural disaster will recover quicker than someone injured by another person, even if it was purely an accident. There is someone to blame. A place to coalesce our frustration and outrage. It festers, transforms, infiltrates the fabric of our being.

Exercise is easy to blame. Sometimes we really don't want to do it. Or we don't feel we deserve to feel that good, so we sabotage ourselves. We have many devices for undermining our goals. We fear success, we fear revealing our shining light.

The pain will come and go. Do not set the unreasonable expectation of it vanishing overnight. That, too, is a form of sabotage. You aren't doing anything 'wrong' as you take this journey. You are exploring. Sometimes you take a path that ends up not exactly where you want to be, so you retrace your steps and try another path. This is not a race. You cannot rush the process. This I know all too well. Excitement over a change, crushed and frustrated when symptoms re-manifest.

Our growth is actually intensified by our explorations. It is so terribly hard to slow down and listen. Every truth we need is within us, waiting to be unveiled.

Perhaps if you found a mantra ... something to recite and signal to yourself that you are truly going to be okay. My personal favorite is: I am safe, I am safe, I am ......

Over and over, weaving it in with strong threads, overwhelming the fear-threads.

You can do this, and so much more. Time will reveal this Truth.

with grace and gratitude,
^_^

 

Thank you, I know I need to remain positive, I'm trying to. I really am. Whenever I feel any symptom I repeat to myself "It's just TMS, relax." It helps.

 

Thing is, I haven't been officially diagnosed with TMS, I'm just trying it since it makes so much sense. I think that is what worries me.

 

No one will 'officially' diagnose you with TMS. This, you will determine for yourself. Official lacks any real meaning. It indicates authority, but we must be our own authority. Do not give away your own power. To give this away puts you in the role of victim. You have the power to determine your own image. The path may look daunting, but you have a support base now. Read as many posts as you can, as it will help gain you inspiration and determination.

with grace and gratitude,
^_^