Day 31

The topic for today is: How are your professional relationships right now? Has the program had any affect on your career?

The main issue that I have with work is my problem with conflict aversion. I don't feel comfortable talking about things that bother me at work. I am trying to be better about this. I also have issues related to money. For years I was making much less than my peers, but I was afraid to ask the boss at my old job. I am blessed to be successful in my career, but I know I could do and make so much more. I was at least able to ask for the same amount that others in my field get once I started at my new job a few months ago. I feel that my self esteem and goodism personality traits are making me too passive in terms of getting what I deserve. My parents did very well in their careers, but bad investments created a horrible atmosphere in our home around the topic of money and investing. Both my parents grew up without much, but they were both able to do very well with hard work. They always provided for me and I never had to worry about money. I am a little frugal and a saver, so, the fact that I don't make as much as I would like does not affect me day to day. However, I think once I have kids I will need more income and I would also like to retire without worrying about money.

I try to do affirmations and I have written out two EFT scripts, but I don't do either of these regularly. I really have a big block when it comes to being confident and strong about making more money and dealing with anyone in authority at my work. My chest and stomach get very tight and I feel very anxious and nervous. I get a strong feeling of wanting to flee.
I don't think the program thus far has helped me relieve these feelings I get when I am around anyone I think is an authority figure or when it comes to money. I will keep working through the structured program and hope that I can get more insight regarding the issue.