Day 4 Disheartening Doctors

What was the most disheartening thing a doctor has told you about your symptoms? In what ways have you kept that in your mind?

This is an extremely difficult subject that has expanded and grown as I have continued on my "chronic pain" journey. In some ways it is like the most recent doctor I have seen is the most disheartening because in my mind that is again one less person that can figure out what is going on and help me. I think that is why I finally stopped searching for that one particular doctor that was going to give me an actual diagnosis and save me from my pain. The disappointment was too much to bear. It reinforces all the discouraging thoughts such as, "I am never going to find a way to get out of this pain, I am always going to feel this way etc." Every time it hurts more and more and becomes traumatic. I think one of the most frustrating things that has come up when seeing doctors for my symptoms is when they say, "oh, it is all in your head, you need to exercise more and work on your depression and anxiety." That and you have fibromyalgia and the only way to help the symptoms is to exercise. The let down when you hear those words come out of a doctors mouth again makes my heart sink into a truly dark place. I have also struggled with doctors that want to run lots of tests and imaging to see if they can figure out the "mystery illness" I am suffering from and every time the test results and imaging comes back normal and then you are referred to a different doctor. It's almost like no doctor wants the responsibility of dealing with you because they aren't sure what to do you with you so they pass you off to another doctor and the cycle gets repeated again and again. Several doctors that I have seen in the past have suggested certain procedures etc. and the majority of these procedures (occipital nerve blocks, ketamine infusion therapy, dry needling) have caused an increase in my pain which has been extremely traumatic. How are you supposed to trust anyone after these experiences? How are you supposed to walk in to a doctors office, physical therapists and massage therapists office when you have had these traumatic experiences? How can you not have fear of one more doctor telling you that they can't help you? For myself, the experience has caused deep rooted anger towards doctors and the American healthcare system in general. All of that being said, it is very hard not to worry that the TMS mind body approach will be another let down and I am not sure how I would deal with it. I am trying not to think of this as my last chance to live pain free but it is the only thing I haven't tried and it carries so much weight. Any idea on how to make this weight feel less would be extremely helpful. I know this process will be that much harder if I have those thoughts over my head.