Day 16 Enrique's success story/Triggers

I went for a short mountain bike ride with my wife today. Long bikes rides, with lots of climbing have been a trigger for me in the past, producing left shoulder pain. With the ride today, there was climbing, but I would not describe this as a challenging ride. I started to get in my head a bit, starting to WORRY about pain starting, and then I could just start to feel the slightest bit of shoulder pain. I began talking to myself- "this is psychological, not physical. This is not a real injury, there is nothing wrong with my shoulder." It went away. If felt like a success.
I need to go for another jog, maybe tomorrow morning or evening. That has been a trigger, and major source of fear, with severe left knee pain. I am going to try again, and continue the self talk. I think I will focus on positive self talk before I start feeling any symptoms, and think about what I could be doing in the future if I was able to run as much as I'd like. I have fantasized about doing a race nearby that combines trail running and fly fishing.

I was a psychology major in undergrad. I have learned about Pavlov's dogs many, many times over the past 20 years, but connecting the salivation as a symptom to the trigger of the bell with TMS symptoms from emotional triggers was a bit of a lightbulb moment!

The first week or so of the program I did share about TMS with a few of my employees and some friends. I felt a bit sheepish, and that was mostly because I was not 100% convinced. I did mention this in a previous forum post. There is a part of me that feels like it isn't worth it trying to educate others about it, but I can sense that I am more confident about it, and would be able to talk more freely about it.
I still feel like this is a very personal form of treatment- all of the journaling, and introspection, and there is a part of me that is happy to just keep it all to myself, and wife.
A friend was a good listener to me briefly describing it, and mentioned that every year right before she starts teaching again, she has some pain. She was on board with the emotional stress/physical pain explanation, and that was helpful.

 

@JanAtheCPA I went for my mile jog this morning, and my knee was pain free! WOW! I decided to distract myself from the start- I started thinking about that trail running/fly fishing race and what type of gear I would use, how I would carry it, etc. I also thought about some of the anger I was experiencing from the past 48 hrs and briefly "indulged" that. I thought about Pavlov's dog salivating, and I visualized neural pathways, with TMS messages being stopped along the pathway, and being redirected or turning around.
I was reflecting on how I have talked about myself for the past 7-11 years, and I have repeatedly identified myself as someone with chronic pain, back pain, neck pain, IT band issues, "I can't run or hike downhill." I have allowed myself to be this person, and now I am working to free myself from it all.
I saw a friend this morning, and shared with him the TMS treatment. He has suffered from anxiety for much of his life, and other issues, including his back "going out." He has seen a therapist for years, and was receptive to it. After I briefly described the improvements so far with my pain, he asked, how about everything else? You are supposed to be mentally better too right? That's the point?" I really appreciated that question. I have been thinking about overall mental health recently, not just eliminating pain, but it put it out there in bright lights for me. Thanks.