Day 14 It goes predictably

No cough since last Friday. I spent the evening with some good people I recently became friends with. I felt heard and accepted and I didn't have to try and convince people that I deserve my new job. That felt great. I had a drink and half way through the urge to cough went away.

Fast forward to Tuesday. I have a difficult day with my course I built. Many students failing to follow through with the course work for various reasons. I came home with some lower back pain and throbbing. Classic TMS move.

I lay on my stomach while my wife massages my lower back and she says I can feel that muscles throbbing and spasm. I close my eyes and sure enough as negative thoughts or worry entered my mind I could feel my muscle spasm worsen.

So now day 2 of back pain. I know it's TMS but it still hurts like a got whacked in the back. Anyway keep on working on messages of safety.

I went for a walk regardless of how my back felt. I walked very very slow. I decided to go ahead and plan something fun for the weekend.

New plan. Implement some meditation before work or listen to one on the way. I find my disappointment or even to a degree anger with the students disregarding the course work. Note to self work on letting it go and not taking it personal.

That's all I got so far. Some familiar ground for sure.