Day 2 Learning to get in touch with myself

Day 2’s assigned reading was helpful for me, because it reinforced and reiterated the key points that I initially took away from my first Dr. Sarno books (the Mindbody Prescription). The attached success story about a recovery from hand and wrist pain due to a supposed RSI was especially impactful for me, since that individual was dealing with a lot of what I am feeling right now. His symptoms were more severe than mine, but affected the same areas of his life - this has given me more hope for a positive outcome.

The journal prompt has given me a few things to think about today since it inquires about what angers me and also what can make me sad. Nothing immediately stood out as being a huge source of anger/sadness, so I know that I need to work on meditating with my feelings. This likely means that a lot of smaller things have built up in my life.

One source of anger and frustration that I’ve thought about a few times as my workplace, since I work for a family company. The pressure to constantly take on new tasks and show leadership Has weighed on me for a few years now, and this year took a big jump with my responsibility growing further (new office, big picture tasks, while still needing to help out in other areas). My boss and I have a fine relationship, but not a super close one. He can be a hard man, so I don’t feel like I always live up to the standard. I know part of this is self imposed pressure, so I need to unpack that.

Another source of anger that I did not recognize immediately is the amount of responsibility I have taken on in the past three years. In addition to work, I am a new homeowner and husband. Although no one thing has seemed hugely stressful, I have a feeling that some of this affects me unconsciously as time goes by. I have a great home and good relationship to be thankful for, but I might need to look out for myself better than I have been

Something that makes me sad has been my inability to be an emotionally consistent person in my family and my marriage these past 10-11 months. I haven’t always been down because of my issue, but I know that I’ve had a lot more bad days than I typically do since rhis began. I’m actively working to retrain my brain on this with outcome independence, which I find to be a powerful concept. Another thing that has caused me a lot of grief is my inability (or perceived inability) to do hobbies or activities that I typically enjoy, since most of them involve active hand use.

I’m not sure if I need to share all this on the form here, but I believe that it helps me stay accountable. I know there are many others going through this as well, so I want to be transparent for myself and others