Day 4 Most disheartening thing a Dr. has told me

Three doctors (none of them back surgeons....haven't gotten to that stage yet) have told me that based on the herniated disc shown in my MRI, surgery would likely be necessary at some point in the future to relieve my sciatica/lower back pain. I’ve seen the MRI and the herniated disc is quite evident, so it's difficult to give up the notion that this is a structural problem.

I come back to TMS because I do have a number of the personality traits which fit the TMS diagnosis as well as a possible triggering event. But it is so hard to just give up the notion that perhaps I am one of the few who really does have a structural problem causing my pain. I so want to be able to fully accept the TMS diagnosis, because I know it's necessary to get better, but I don't see how I can set aside my lingering doubts when I can't stand up straight or walk without pain and a noticeable limp.

- Mark

 

I went that route, too ..... I knew I was the one in a million that had the structural issue and not TMS. Well, it's not like that at all. My symptoms moved around - and of course, I have every personality trait possible that lies in the TMS zone. For me, it was doing alot of reading, journaling - about 10 years ago before I knew about TMS, I attributed my symptoms to anxiety (which oddly enough is probably a TMS derivative!). I kept track of my symptoms over the course of many years on a small calendar. I didn't notice for some time, but the symptoms would hang in there for awhile, then go away - they would move and change. If I didn't have that calendar, I probably wouldn't have really noticed the changing or what was going on, but seeing it in writing was the proof for me!

 

I had spinal surgery when I was 16 years old. Most of my spine is fused. I have a few vertebrae in my neck and lower back that are not fused. I have herniated disc, buldging disc and bone spirs in the disc not fused. 14 years ago I had spinal surgeonn tell me I had to eliminate all bending because my options were so limited. I gave up gardening. I gave up so many things to accomodate his orders. My life has been so diminished until I found Dr. Sarno and the wiki.

The list of symptoms are numerous; tailbone pains, abdominal cramping, gluts cramping, TMJ, shin splints, heel pain, RSI, tingling in my hands and feet, allergies, asthma, bladder disease, UTIs and on and on. And depression.
I have shoveled several feet of snow... no pain. Now gardening again... no pain. Playing tennis... no pain. Walking 4-6 mikes each day... no pain.

 

Life is good, very good for the first time in years. Yes, I have to manage all my personality traits all the time. You can do this too. Yes, you can!

 

markt54, you have to give your mind at least a month to 6 weeks to re-condition to your new way of thinking and you have to think its all emotional now even if you doubt so when the six weeks is up you will start to do better. You have to try and believe with everything you got in order to have this reconditioning phase ok. The reason I say this is because if you doubt for 6 weeks then think where you are going to be in 6 weeks.

The proof is there for you to see. There is proof all through the wiki here about tms and what it does. You have to let this truth soak in your mind and grow. The physical thoughts is saturated in your mind now.

The more you think emotional and read all the psychological reasons for you having this pain then the more you will grow to accept that this is emotionally caused and not structural at all. You might feel it structurally but the root cause is in the reactions you have toward stressors in your life and so much more.

You can do like many other people and get the surgery if you wish -- but I have a question for you. Have you ever heard of anyone that has ever had successful back surgery?

Bless You

Oh an I have that problem in my spine that DR. Sarno says might be the only case if there was any case that needed attention structurally cause my vertabra is slipped forth about an inch or two. He said in his book that under X- ray it looks scary. Now You know when I read that I really wanted to speak to someone that had been diagnosed with spondelothesis.

I was just looking in the anxiety direction which just caused me more pain. The more you believe its structural then the more you will focus on the body and hurt. You have to get to work on the emotional and psychological so you can heal.

 

Eric,

What you have said here has really resonated with me. I read and finished 'Healing Back Pain' around 11 days ago - the first time I have read it and really let the concepts sink in. This has led me here and I am now around 7 days into the program. I have been getting better i think - I used to take at least 4 strong painkillers a day (2 twice a day) but am now managing on only 2, usually needing them mid afternoonish to get me through work. I have been feeling like it may not be working with me though due to not getting better faster. I guess I wanted that 'book healing' phenomenon you seem to read so much about.

Hearing you talk about the re-conditioning of your mind taking at least 6 weeks has really given me the determination to keep believing in this as much as I possibly can.

Are you completely pain free now then may I ask?

Thanks,

Adam

By the way - Markt54 - it sounds like we are suspiciously similar. I have a bulging L5-S1 disc that is degernerated to view on an MRI. Surgeon has offered me fusion. I am rooting for you, and myself, that we can get through this and heal! Good luck mate. No dount we will see each other round here - similar progress into the program

 

ok UkadR I'm glad your feeling better. Your down on the meds and doing better. That's great for your 7th day in. You have about 42 more to go while you recondition now. So just take your time and learn all you can ok. Do the SEP all the way through. And ask all the questions you can. You need to recondition your whole thinking to the Sarno way. That means no focus on any bodily symptoms at all ok. No fear of any bodily symptoms and No reacting to lifes pressures -- you have to give up your anxieties.

Yes I am doing great. I feel as good as I did before I got hurt the last time. I have had my battles but I stay in control of my re-actions thus my emotions. If I ever lose control over those reactions Im toast but I also do meditations and deep breathing and imaging so I keep safe in a lot of ways but I do believe our reactions are where its at with lifes laws of attraction and pain ya know. Like reacting to lifes pressures. Clean thinking is a must so if you worry think then that will have to be renewed too. You can't think stressful and think you will beat a stressful case.

This would sound impossible but you believe so you can do it. The more you give up lifes pressures the more you will heal ok.

Thanks