Day 1 My little summary

I've been introduced to Sarno's theory three months ago. I still completely agree with the idea he presents and still view it as the primary player in my pain condition. I feel serious sympathy towards my fellow sufferers and their many failures of finding something that has any effect whatsoever on their pain. However, I'm convinced our pain is indeed a protective mechanism generated by our mind. I'm putting the time to log my thoughts and feelings even though I have many other things I'd rather do with my time but I think it will accelerate my progress and it's worth the effort.

A.

 

Welcome, Avi.

There is a lot of hope and support here.

 

A question to ponder:

Have you been overly critical of yourself lately? How and why have you done this? If you feel comfortable sharing, then post your response in a thread in our Structured Program forum. We would love to hear from you.

I can be very critical of myself. I do this with all aspects of my career and with people I know, quite often with people I know only superficially . Regarding my career, I feel the only option for me is to be the best or else I do not have a shot. I don’t mind that because it means I’m ready to fight for what I want. I don’t feel like I’m grinding too much, I know how to have fun and try to balance it well. Even though I’m much impressed with the progress I’ve made regarding self-criticism, I feel that I still have remnants of that overly self-critical personality regarding little things I do or say that I regret. It’s still not easy for me to remember that sometimes I just say things without thinking too much. I forget that it’s highly impractical to think about every sentence before you say it and that it’s not the end of the world if I say something or behave in a certain way that I regret or that is seemingly perceived negatively by the person(s) I’m talking to.

 

I watch every facial expression, every tone in voice, every body movement and words to see if someone is unhappy with what I have said or done. Then I became depressed. I didn't even know why. Now I know and can work on it.

Welcome Avi.

 

Day 13: Question To Ponder: What TMS-related book, article, or news story have you found the most helpful in solidifying your belief in the diagnosis? If you feel comfortable sharing, then post your response in a thread in our Structured Program forum. We would love to hear from you.


Sarno's second book, "Healing Back Pain: The Mind-Body Connection" is still the most concrete presentation of the TMS phenomenon for me. It was the first book I read about this, so I may be biased. But I do think that a lot of the other books by other authors are not as clear and blatant in conveying this idea to the reader. This sometimes nullifies the description of this condition and may actually prevent people from accepting the obvious validity of this diagnosis. A few TMS-related books seem to have been written for the sake of writing yet another book, with a different name for the condition, and a slightly different twist, but they obscure the crystal clear writing of Sarno.

A.

 

Day 16 Question To Ponder: Since starting this program have you told anyone about your condition and TMS? Why or Why not? If you have how did they react? If you feel comfortable sharing, then post your response in a thread in our Structured Program forum. We would love to hear from you.

I have told my brothers, my mother, and implied it to a few people I know with pain problems. I wanted to let them know about this because I think it’s the answer and the explanation to my chronic pain. I guess I was also egotistical in the sense that I wanted to show them the answer and have them thank me. My brothers reacted well, one of them took a little while to acknowledge the strength of this theory. My mother reacted well too, I don’t expect her to delve into the details but perhaps I’ll send her the book or translate it to her someday. The two or three friends of mine all received it very badly I have to say. They almost evaded talking about it or blatantly said it’s not it, or that it’s dangerous to think that our minds creates the pain. I was surprised as I felt my friends who are very intelligent scientists and supposedly free thinkers, would be open to this but alas, they almost rejected this out of fear without even considering it. However, if there’s something I’ve learned is, time can do wonders to such things. If one plants a little seed, one may find a tree there later on.

A.

 

I have told people that I "see" these personality traits in them and they have pain. I have found that most are very interested and fascinated. But it seems like a lot of people are not willing to do the work. And it is work but the rewards are great.

I agree with planting the seed. It continues to roll around in their minds. They listen and talk to others and think "I wonder".

 

Thanks for your replies people.

Day 17: Question To Ponder: What part of this program do you find the most helpful? If you feel comfortable sharing, then post your response in a thread in our Structured Program forum. We would love to hear from you.

The program is a good framework. It feels like I don’t need to worry about constructing some “plan”, I just need to follow something simple and straightforward that was already tried and built by people who probably suffer very similar chronic pain to mine. I think the program's "vibe" is of flexibility and I that's very important to me. I think it definitely promotes the notion of not necessarily following the plan to the letter. If I feel like doing something different than the program, I just do it. If the program says that day 16 is about writing a letter to someone or something and I don’t really feel like doing that, then I just change it. It’s also very easy to understand and yet insightful. In other words, the text doesn’t generate a feeling of superiority, e.g. as if it was written by someone who thinks they need to teach everybody how to do it right.

A.

 

I do something everyday. I am currently reading Dr. David Clarke's book "They can't find anything wrong." It has offered tremendous in sight. One evening I am read it and journal. The next evening read the wiki and journal. Always something every day. I find if I don't the pain gets worse. I have to keep my mind working on understanding all the stuff in my head.

 

Day 18, Question To Ponder: Take a look at your journal entries. What emotions are most prevalent? If you feel comfortable sharing, then post your response in a thread in our Structured Program forum. We would love to hear from you.

In my earlier journal entries, I describe feelings of anger, anxiety or very generic descriptions of “feeling bad” or “feeling good”. I also describe “feeling hurt” and offended. I feel shame and embarrassment. Recently I started describing sorrow, compassion and guilt. These feelings towards others, I have been ignoring. I have been concentrating on myself for a long time, supposedly to better myself and work in my own self interests and belittle others beyond common courtesy and the golden rule of "do unto others...". But it seems these feelings towards others exist in me, subconsciously, and in large quantities. Paradoxically, repressing feelings towards others had worked against my own self interests, as it made me very anxious, perhaps making my mind think that I can’t consciously handle these emotions. It’s not easy to admit I have feelings towards others, and it was perceived as weakness to me. But, I feel that being able to admit the existence of these emotions actually shows strength and fearlessness, being able to stare my emotional reality in the face.

 

It sounds like you are saying you have been very hard on others then find out you have been even harder on yourself but unaware of this. You have unresonable high standards for others and unreasonable high standards for yourself.

Well, we have to be perfect don't we? what a burden. I Sounds like you are pealing the layers off bit by bit. It does take courage and strength, and you have it.