My Progress Record in the Structure Educational Program

Day 1: Question to Ponder: What would a life without TMS mean to you? It would mean I could put my full concentration on fulfilling my God-given vision. Or, to start with, simply to keep my schedule instead of Googling all kinds of health sites.

 

Day 2: I commit myself to this program, knowing that it can take 45 minutes a day.

 

As someone who had been through what you're going through, You're heading on the right track. Good luck

 

Thanks Wheelchair.
Day 3: Since one of the main causes of stress for me is people pleasing, and I have found a site that gives Scriptures and affirmations dealing with the fear of man. I plan to start and finish my TMS sessions with these Scriptures affirmations.

 

Day 4: Today I will work on the “my personality” portion of the sources of TMS using the questions in the TMS Personality Traits list.

Perfectionist: “Do you ignore your own needs and feelings to accomplish a task?” Yes, I do. I have been developing a schedule that takes into account all my needs: physical, emotional, mental and spiritual as well as tasks. This is already starting to help.

Goodist: “Do you routinely change your plans to satisfy the schedule or needs of others?” Yes. I think increasing awareness of this will help. It is very related to what I wrote in the perfectionist part too.

Anxiety/fear personality area. I will ask my own question: "How much time do I spend googling health because I think I have to do everything perfectly or I will get a serious disease?" I think eliminating the people pleasing will help this. I cannot be confident that I am doing "enough" in the health area unless I allow myself to be, and to express, who I am.

So of all the personality traits, I see that it is people pleasing that I need to focus on. Three ways I see right now to help conquer this:

1. Awareness. Doing this journal daily should keep me aware.
2. Follow my schedule.
3. Read the Scripture verses on the Be Free of Need for Approval website (See Day 3 post.) and create affirmations for each. (I copied the Scriptures so I could read them aloud instead of listening to the video. It’s more personal that way.)

 

Affirmations are key, Affirmations like I love myself and trying to feel that love for yourself, closing your eyes. Feeling the gratitude. Once you feel gratitude for life, your healing begins.

 

Thanks Wheelchair. It is good to know someone is reading my posts.

Day 5: This morning I read “If you pay close attention to your body, you will find that you often have physical reactions (often very mild ones) to common emotions that occur.” Then I started journaling about a past event where somebody who should have been my protector wasn’t. I was crying, but then suddenly I started coughing, so hard I started retching. So I connected the dots. But what to do about this awareness? I had already been to counselors long ago. Before continuing to explore my feelings about this, I soaked in a favorite Bible verse: “The LORD is my rock and my fortress, and my deliverer, my God, my strength, in whom I will trust; my buckler, and the horn of my salvation, and my high tower"…Psalm 18:2

 

Day 6: I repress sadness or anger because

a. These emotions weren’t validated when I was young.
b. Expressing sadness and anger wasn’t modeled by my parents so I thought it wasn’t okay
c. I didn’t want to overwhelm my mother with my emotions because she cried too much.

When I hear an internal bully criticizing, pressuring, or terrifying me, I need to let myself feel anger and say inside “How dare you!” I am not sure I think that is OK. I will practice.

 

Day 8: Question to ponder: Yes, I am recognizing my emotions. This causes sadness, tears, and sometimes body reactions, but it does not cause physical pain. My symptom is swollen lymph nodes, so I don’t know if this is connected to emotions. But I do know that I need to lower my stress and recognizing emotions helps.

 

Day 9: Question to ponder: Is it true that when I don’t put so much pressure on myself, I am more productive? That is not happening now, because I am taking more time for resting and healing. My hope is the payoff will be more productivity later due to my being rested and healed. “Discipline can exist without pressure.” I’m not sure how that works. Also, I have critical thoughts, pressure thoughts and fear thoughts. I want to be free of these kinds of thoughts. Romans 8:14-15 is a good start.

 

Day 10: Dear house, you cause me stress because I have trouble finding things. This makes me mad. It makes me feel helpless. It makes me feel like a loser. It makes me want to give up. Today I will focus on a place for everything and everything in its place.

 

I am glad to bump into this thread. Im beginning to like the program. How to start it?

 

Mugwump, the Structured Educational Program is a 42 day program.

You can find it at https://www.tmswiki.org/ppd/Structured_Educational_Program (Structured Educational Program)

 

Day 11: I have a question for myself: Is my need for so many naps physical or emotional? I do not know the answer. Swollen lymph nodes without pain is not a usual TMS symptom and I am scheduled to visit an integrative doctor in a couple of weeks to see if there are physical causes. I may take a break from this program until I get the results.

 

I don't believe swollen lymph nodes without pain is a usual symptom of TMS, that would be a good thing to get checked out as you're doing, but I know fatigue can be.

 

HI!
I am having swollen glands with pain. How is this TMS related? I'm having a very stressful time and any advice would be great!