Need some Clarity / Guidance

Hey guys,
I had recovered around 80% from TMS in June 2021, Im not going to go into symptoms as they are useless but I had a very major improvement.

i’ve had relapses here and there after this but they all passed within a few days.

this particular relapse however has been going on since March 2023 in totality, although its had its ups and downs, the relapse within tbe relapse happened on the start of the new year i.e. 2024.

Out of nowhere my depression and anxiety have spiked GREATLY, I dont even enjoy doing anything anymore and my mind is rushing and my body feels extremely sensitized. I cant even watch a movie and enjoy it.

Im also so confused, I DONT KNOW where to start with the TMS work again, Ive researched so much, tried so many mindsets but one which I find particularly confusing is Steve Ozanichs, he suggests the way out is exclusively by living in the present, easy eh?

He had also put me onto David R Hawkins work which honestly I find so confusing as it sounds so pseudo scientific but its all causing a tear within me, I dont know what to choose and what to follow I have no IDEA and its so frustrating its leading me down a dark dark road.

I genuinely do not know what to follow or do, the depression and anxiety are honestly kicking my ass, it feels like my lifes over and I simply CANNOT snap out the mindset.

Any help / words of comfort would be greatly appreciate. Thankyou

 

Ive thought about this and I think it must come from a mindset of lack of selfworth and self destruction, deep down something WANTS Me to stay stuck

furthermore this constant search for an answer is insatiable, I cant get myself to stop

should I maybe consider some meds to calm down for now? As this fight in my mind really isnt ending well, Im eating one time a day at this point and shaking 24/7 from the anxiety

 

Hi @Robinetc
Keep reminding yourself that the anxiety and depression are just a form of TMS, that your brain is in protective mode and that you are ok.
Claire Weekes books address your symptoms well, and are easily understood and helpful.
I’ve found Steve O confusing, but the basics (after gleening from old posts) that your brain feels there is something wrong -that you feel fragmented but this is a TMS illusion. It can go offline processing emotions etc (or get blocked) we use our defenses (anxiety and depression can be defenses to keep us from big feelings) - like you said, you are simply stuck, and can eventually feel better and move forward.
Medication is OK if you need it. Seeing a therapist is OK if you need it. When I was stuck I saw an EMDR therapist for a few months (because there is a mind/body component to it).
Go slow if you feel really sensitized, and try to do what you can for your nervous system - meditation or simple breathing sessions.
You can learn to value your self worth, and you can learn to forgive yourself for the impulses to self-destruction when you are ready.

 

Go out in nature, somewhere in silence, take a walk there.

Help someone in need. Give money or help them with something else, talk with them, cook for them etc. It will get you out of the "I, me mine" and at the same time it will help you feel good about yourself because you are helping someone else.

Listen to gentle but happy music. I know that you don't feel like it now but do it anyway.

Spend some time with a pet, a cat is recommended, I'm not kidding, cats are great for depression and anxiety, they absorb the vibrations and calm you down. Just pet the cat for a few minutes and listen to her purring.

Take care.

 

Have you tried the DARE app for anxiety? (it's free to try out for 14 days) https://www.dareresponse.com/dareapp/ (Dare App - Dare Response) This website tells you about it https://thewellnesssociety.org/dare-technique/ (Dare Book and App - The Wellness Society | Self-Help, Therapy and Coaching Tools)