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No physical problem even got surgery?

Discussion in 'General Discussion Subforum' started by Simmon, Oct 22, 2023.

  1. Simmon

    Simmon Newcomer

    I got endoscopic back surgery. Most of doctors said I don't need it but few of doctor said I need surgery. And the surgeon told me the surgery was quite simple because he used endoscope, not microscope. I have a 1cm scar on my back. As a result, surgery wasn't able to reduce my back pain. I think I didn't need this surgery as most doctors said. I have one question. Don't I really have any physical back problem even though I got unnecessary surgery? I know that TMS can be applied if there is no physical problem. So I'm a bit worried. Am I OK?
     
  2. Cactusflower

    Cactusflower Beloved Grand Eagle

    @Simmon
    Dr. Hanscom is an American spine surgeon who stopped doing surgery to work with people and tms. He thinks most people who get surgery have tms, but most doctor’s and surgeon’s don’t know what tms is.
    Dr. Hanscom, like Dr. Sarno thinks that deep and often unknown anger and rage cause tms. You don’t realize how angry you are, and are often “stuck” in this anger mindset. They key is, people don’t always feel angry. And it’s not always anger: it could be childhood events (sometimes you don’t even remember), or current stress. No matter what, it’s how we handle these emotional things and hold them in our bodies.
    Love Heals is a film about a woman who had two spine surgeries that did not help her. It took her some time, but she discovered the emotional reasons for her pain. She works, lives, travels and is ok even with some pain but it is slowly lessening.
    This is hard to hear, but we have to learn to be ok with some physical and emotional pain in our lives knowing that if we learn to work through these things, it can get better. You have to learn to trust yourself that life can be better.
     
    JanAtheCPA likes this.
  3. JanAtheCPA

    JanAtheCPA Beloved Grand Eagle

    @Simmon, having had the benefit of "talking" with you on yesterday's Chat, I believe that one of your biggest roadblocks is your regret and guilt that you agreed to have the surgery, even though there were specialists who said not to. You are now blaming yourself for making the wrong decision, and you are well on your way to convincing yourself that you made a terrible mistake which you must now live with for the rest of your life.

    This is a false story, made up by your fearful brain.

    You are very young, and your body has already healed. You have seen a lot of doctors, and as far as I can tell, you have no restrictions on what you can do physically. The big thing holding you back is that you must forgive yourself.

    Self forgiveness is the first thing you must accomplish. Without that, the next step cannot be accomplished. There are a lot of resources out there to help you learn what it takes to forgive yourself - choose ones that are based on therapeutic practices, for example
    https://www.goodtherapy.org/blog/self-forgiveness-why-is-it-so-hard/ (GoodTherapy | Self-Forgiveness – Why Is It So Hard?)
    Or
    https://www.verywellmind.com/how-to-forgive-yourself-4583819 (How to Forgive Yourself)

    The next step is to figure out why you had such extreme pain at such a young age to begin with. This is not normal! When I see such a young person with such severe issues I automatically wonder about the family and the environment growing up. You will have to look at that if you want to fully recover.

    To do the emotional work, there are several options. One is the workbook that Scotty recommended. Another is the Structured Educational Program I mentioned in one of your other posts. Individual therapy or counseling, as you mentioned yesterday, is always worth exploring.
     

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