Not even a year - what I (have not) learned

I could swear I was close to 1 and a half year of TMS healing, checked my YouTube history and was shocked to realize my first searches for "what is chronic pain?" date from the last week of may 24

Well, I'd like to summarize some things:

1- How fucked up my mind was, I had no idea
2- How fucked up the medical system is, I kinda had an idea
3- Shame is supposed to be felt, not ran away from
4- Pain is also supposed to be felt, and you don't need to add puppies toughts to it (sorry Gordon)
5- It's mesmerizing how stubborn the amygdala is, there must be a way to have a more practical talk with it
6- I wish I knew what happens in the head of a book healer when they're sunk in the Mindbody Prescription
7- Ok ok my body is fine, pain is just a false alarm and I don't need to worry. Now try doing something with nasty mind induced back spasms...
8- Apart from that, it's all about the second arrow of suffering. Budha was a clever guy.

 

Hahaha in The Way Out, when Gordon explains somatic tracking, he says you gain extra points if you think of nice things when doing it. I actually don't recall if it's a puppy or a baby picture that's in the book, but it's there.

 

You know, for some reason my ego hates self-compassion. Every time I go for it, it begins trying to shame me with self-deprecating reactions. I suspect it thinks I'm trying to kill it.