Day 1 Progress so far (lots of it!)

Hi everyone - I started reading Steve Ozanich's 'The Great Pain Deception' exactly 5 weeks ago (which was one week after a consultation with a TMS/SIRPA therapist). I feel that 80-90% of pain symptoms have gone - after 3 years and 11 months of disabling leg pain! (For brevity's sake, I won't repeat my pain story, which you can read on my profile.)

I am 2/3rds of the way through 'The Great Pain Deception', and have embarked on this Structured Educational Programme with a bit of a head start. I have made incredible progress - I went for a half hour walk at a good pace today experiencing just some tightness in one leg - compared to previously hobbling for 1-2 minutes on a 'good' day. 5 weeks ago I was 50-50 regarding my TMS diagnosis. I understood that stress and emotions can make pain worse, but not that they are the cause. Now I am 100% convinced that I have (or did have!) TMS.

But I want to eradicate this thing for good and know that I need to delve deeper to succeed.

A fortnight ago was my 'breakthrough' week. My symptoms and mobility had substantially improved. For the first time in years, I felt that I could walk and stand as much as *I* wanted to - and not my pain. This was a turning point and gave my confidence in both TMS diagnosis and my physical abilities a huge boost. I made 2 more changes that week: I stopped the daily physiotherapy exercises that I've been doing for a year, plus I stopped timing myself when walking to measure my progress. They aren't doing me any physical harm, but are reinforcing the notion that there is something physically wrong that needs to be 'fixed'. Steve Ozanich stressed these things from the start of his book, but it took me 2-3 weeks to be confident enough to do so. And it felt good!

Next steps: journaling
I have bought a lockable notepad and intend to start journaling this week. Before I started looking into TMS, I wrote down some notes about someone who had really wound me up, which helped to some extend to offload. I know that there are a number of things/people who are making me/have made me feel very angry. I find it hard to let go of things that have p*ssed me off and I waste a lot of energy ruminating over situations in my head. However, Steve O says that the anger or emotions behind TMS symptoms are things that you *don't* know that you're angry about(!) So hopefully, journaling will help to uncover these issues and support my healing. I am also seeing a counsellor who is open to the idea of TMS and had started looking into Dr Sarno's treatments; she is also going to advise me on how to get the most out of journaling. Wish me luck!

 

I do the same thing of spending too much time ruminating over situations in my head. As suggested on another Day, I say to myself "wouldn't it be nice if I had this all figured out."

Share with us any insights that you have. Good Luck S