Day 19 Proud and a little ashamed

I'm preally proud of having stuck with this program, and being able to notice a real reduction in not only my physical symptoms, but also being able to truly access my emotions. It feels like I've been in hiding for my entire life, and have just emerged from the bunker and am finally seeing all the wonders and feeling all the intensity. It's beautiful, but also painful. The sounds are so loud and the sun is so bright. It feels very wonderous, but also very dangerous.

Sometimes, I really want to crawl back underground.

This past week, I had a big day planned at the studio, but I knew that a certain potter would be there who is self-absorbed, needy, entitled, ungrateful, rude, and negative. He has a lot of good traits too, like he's really good at teaching and studio management, but the day I was supposed to go, I got a migraine with split vision, nausea, and flashing lights, and the following headache was so bad, I had to stay in bed for most of the day.

I had been having such amazing progress up until this point, so I feel a little discouraged and ashamed, but I'm having a pain free day today and my anxiety is almost non-existent, so I am proud of that progress. I'll get back on my bike this afternoon.

Happy Lundi Gras to everyone, everywhere! Thank you for reading again.