Day 5 PTSD - do I continue?

I have suspected that I suffer from PTSD to some degree and have for several years, though I have never been diagnosed. I am in therapy to address the anxiety that I experience and we also do EMDR for traumatic memories.

Should I continue with the program, or no?

I have pursued the program because neither my doctor nor my therapist understand TMS and thus, cannot (will not?) treat me for it.

 

Hi Layne
Your previous post mentions a violent, traumatic event that you are quite aware of from your past. I can't even imagine the pain and devastation you've experience from that event, I am so sorry. I was actually given the PTSD diagnosis 11 years ago and received professional treatment for it. While I certainly am in no position to tell you one way or another whether you should continue the program or not, I can tell you what I've found to be true for myself so far and possibly that will help you.

As I mentioned previously, I've received all the "official" depression and anxiety diagnoses in addition to the PTSD (and I share your feeling about western medicine). I can't quite make a connection between the depression and TMS and I hadn't even thought about a relationship between TMS and PTSD until you mentioned it here. I can see a connection between anxiety and TMS and they look to me like the mind taking different routes to the same destination. I've read so much lately that I can't pinpoint where I saw this to give proper credit to its source, but it was making reference to anxiety and TMS - and I believe depression was also included there as well- as signposts or alarms to our conscious that there's a problem.

Dr Sarno used the analogy of the subconscious mind being a maximum security prison in his book. All the most dangerous criminals (thoughts) are locked in there, they're all full of rage, and they're all constantly trying to escape. Something about this analogy struck me and I was thinking about it in terms of my self and the depression, anxiety, and TMS. If they all share the same intended outcome - keeping the prisoners locked in - maybe my mind decides which one to employ based on the threat level, so to speak. Possibly one of these guys in the "plotting" stages of escape isn't deemed as much of a threat as the one that has made it to the top of the outermost fence & is ready to jump so the necessary force to prevent the escape is different.

I have actually noticed more improvement in my anxiety and depression levels from this education so far than a reduction in the pain in my neck and shoulder. Depression, anxiety, and PTSD are all extremely painful and frightening in their own ways. Anything I can learn to lessen pain from any one of these disorders is worth its weight in gold to me. I can also tell you that the supervised "professional" therapy I received for the PTSD diagnosis was very similar to the education program found here. Journaling, education, breathing and relaxation techniques, confronting fear, and talk therapy (which we get here in the forums without a bill!). The only things I got during treatment that I'm not getting here are office visits and a prescription for medication.

I hope this made sense & maybe helps you in some small way.

 

Hi Layne,

Can you ask your doctor if it seems safe for you to work on TMS? If your doctor has ruled out more serious conditions, it probably is.

Dr. James Alexander who posts here sometimes is a psychotherapist who just wrote a book on TMS that has a section on EMDR and EFT. I just started the book but I like it a lot so far. I wonder if it might help to check out that book and talk about it with your therapist: http://thehiddenpsychologyofpain.com/ ?

Take care.

 

Leslie - thank you for your kind words. Yes, my husband at the time and I were driving when he was shot and paralyzed. We ended up crashing... and I took care of him for 3 years - all the while suppressing everything I was feeling because he was the one who was paralyzed and he needed the support. I don't always like talking about it because I don't want people to think I am trying to get attention or to be felt sorry for. But, sometimes it just needs to come out.

This made a lot of sense! Wow! It would make sense that one day I am more tired, the next, more anxious, and the next depressed. What a neat thought, thank you!

Veronica - I can ask her, sure. But we have ruled out serious illness by way of colonoscopy/endoscopy. As far as the fatigue is concerned, my hormone levels are off a bit and that can contribute to fatigue as well as the insomnia with which I have suffered for over 2 years. But the insomnia started around the same time as the anxiety (and becoming independent for the first time in my life, taking on a great amount of student loan debt, beginning graduate school, etc...) so I'm certain they are connected. I think I'm going to keep going.

Thank you ladies! xoxo

 

Waking the Tiger by Dr. Peter Levine may be of interest to you. He discusses the impact of shock trauma to the mind and body. I only started it so I can't say much but would think that experience had a huge impact on you mentally and physically.

 

Hi Layne,

You might also be interested in The Great Pain Deception by Steve Ozanich, who is also a forum member. His long (and successful) battle with pain began with caring for a paralyzed spouse.

 

Ooo thank you both. I actually own Waking the Tiger - I just haven't read it yet... Tarala - I will have to look into that one!