Day 3 Question to ponder

I actually went to the gym yesterday. It was hard but I really did show no fear. I did 20 min on the eliptical and 20 minutes on my most feared piece of equipment... The bike. Since my neck "went out on me" while biking. I had prepared myself that my neck may get irritated doing it, but that I wasn't going to care how I felt... Just that I did it and wasn't afraid to do it.

I even did my abs and lower back! No pain... Besides the pain in my abs laughing today from DOMS.. Lol.

I'm not gonna compare that I felt good, since I know that it can come back... But I am trying to think more psychologically and redirecting any thoughts that I have when they come. My mind is so tired.

Really, today my main thing is... I want to be anxious about something.. It's like my mind won't give itself a break. It's been really hard today to redirect myself from feeling anxiety since it seems to be the way that it's been for the past few months. I'm always on red alert about something and it's hard mentally to recognize this and stop those emotions. I'm finding that it doesn't matter what it's about... But me realizing what's going on and trying to turn down that volume is helping!

 

I find I feel like this sometimes, too. I used to love the feeling of being in a rush, being slightly anxious/excited. The rush of adrenaline got me high. Now that I have learned to calm myself down, I think my mind sometimes misses that rush. I just remind myself that the adrenaline was an addiction just like any other addiction, which finally became harmful and I needed to end.

 

Ugh thank you Gailnyc! I'm glad I'm not alone.. Yeah, I'm pretty sure it was the "anxiety - adrenaline" thing that got me back here... Worrying about "what if's" has become a problem for me lately.. Now that the neck pain is gone (hopefully for good!) My mind is scrambling for something else to fixate on, obsess, and feel anxious about. Today was a lot harder today than yesterday. I think I'm gonna need to do that exercise where you just watch your thoughts fly by and observe them, our brains are crazy creatures! This is really tough work to get back to where I was before.

 

The "obsession" substitution is a troublemaker for me also. I went from being obsessed with finding and "curing" the "physical problem" to being obsessed with learning as much as I possibly could about the "psychological" problem. I often find as if I'm searching for my next obsession. I'm with Gail, I think it's the adrenaline addiction. When we're stressed our adrenal glands run on high 24/7 (incidentally they also suck most of the b vitamins from our system while they're doing that which is why unless we're in the 'hyper' state we almost always feel tired) pumping adrenaline into our bodies to enable us to "flee" that perceived threat. The body gets used to it just like it does a drug and the withdrawal can be just as bad. I think each time I find myself searching for something to obsess over I'm going to give myself the options of obsessive journaling or obsessive meditating and see if that doesn't curb the cravings

 

I get it.. I think what the most important thing to do is to reprogram your subconscious. I have a certain situation in my life at present, which really isn't that big of a deal.... But I take one negative thought about it and start obsessing about it, and feeding it and fueling it.. Then it grows into this nasty thing. So what I've been trying to do with these thoughts... As well as the TMS is redirect the thoughts and stand up to them. It is the hardest thing to do ever.... But what is most important is that you not replace obsessive thinking about pain or problems with new obsessive things like obsessive journaling or meditating... Yes, do those things to ease your mind.. But then again, I think.... In a way we need to obsessively reprogram our minds... Lol. Redirect our thoughts, and not feed into the compulsiveness of it. Whenever I think of a negative/obsessive thought I just say "NO" to myself in a really crazy voice in my head and pretend i'm pulling my hair to redirect my way of thinking... I've also heard that using a rubber band around your wrist, and flicking it each time you have an obsessive thought that puts you in that state can help.

I really have been meditating a lot to the frequency 528 hz and visualizing along with feeling of my chakras being healed. I know it's silly but it's working...

http://attunedvibrations.com/528hz/

this video is cool too about it..


and here's an interesting article about obsessiveness

http://www.outofstress.com/stop-obsessive-thoughts/

oh yeah, this video was really really cool too.. our emotions really have a lot of power on everything..



so if any of you are bored.. watch these or read about these things... I think that your emotions are the most important thing ever and how you "feel" can give your thoughts a lot more power... I think that we all kind of have a gift of feeling intense thoughts.. We just need to redirect them to enrich our lives and others..

 

Also look through the TMS Structured Educational Program.. Alan does say that getting anxiety can mean that you're repressing some emotion... Because when the pain's gone, the emotions come up again since that's what the pain was doing in the first place. I'm just trying to figure out exactly what type of emotion I'm trying to repress... Redirect my thoughts, and not let the anxiety get the better of me.

 

*raises hand* I have this too. I kind of get racing thoughts too. My husband said one time that sometimes he's not thinking about anything at all (like when driving or doing mundane tasks) and this totally confuses me b/c I'm thinking all the time: what I need to do, recalling whether I did do this or that, how I want to re-arrange my closet, etc. I've noticed that in the past couple of days since I've been feeling physically better my dreams have become more vivid and I'm not sleeping as well (I used to sleep like a rock with no dream recollection). So, it will take a while to reset my brain ... but I'm not giving up!

 

I'm going to try meditation to that frequency today. I know it takes practice, and I am getting better at it so I'm helping the vibration frequency will help my mind relax more fully. I have some "sound scape" cd's that I've had some success with if I listen to them in headphones while meditating and it does seem to be the sounds with the more "tangible" vibration that produce the most calming response for me. I'm looking forward to this.

 

A friend of mine experimented with today and the results were really surprising (and a bit scary) for both of us. We both listened to a mediation that was about 6 minutes at 528 hz and both realized an almost immediate sensation of calming, along with some other pleasant physiological changes. I wanted to experiment so I found some youtube stuff done at 741 hz to see if I could notice anything in my body. The changes were very unpleasant and happened in less than 5 seconds of listening. A friend had similar results from the experiment. The 528 hz produced pleasant, calming effects physiologically while the 741 hz resulted in increased agitation, irritability, and even chest pains for my friend. I noticed similar changes to my mood and I also noticed an incredible tension spread throughout most of my body. These changes hung on a lot longer than the pleasant ones, and we both went back to the 528 hz afterwards trying to reverse the effects. It still had a calming effect but it took a lot longer and didn't return either of us to the same degree of calm we had experienced from listening to it before the 741 hz.

Meditating to the 528 hz (before screwing it all up with the 741 hz) seemed to decrease the time it took for my mindbody to relax while meditating. Again, before the 741 got involved I also noticed the feelings of calm and relaxation remained with me, which they typically don't do when I meditate. Usually the feelings are fading within minutes of opening my eyes, but this time they seemed to hang on longer. Thanks so much for sharing!

 

You are welcome! Yeah, it's all in the eye of the beholder with all of this stuff I think I had a negative experience with 528hz the other day... But it was my mind frame... It's all about letting go and not letting fear interfere (pun intended ... Cool stuff! I think meditation is a really awesome thing.. But scientifically speaking.... I think that it is really cool that 528 hz cured dirty water! I'll have to check out 741 and see how I feel after and let you know.. lol