repression of feelings in TMS

hello everyone,

So, as I'm reading through John Sarno's back pain book it's clear that repression of feelings is a clear part of TMS, but I don't personally think that applies to my case. I am fully aware of my extremely high anxiety levels and know where they come from. I am afraid of the muscle tension that comes from the muscle spasms because I'm afraid of the muscle tension causing injury which I'm afraid will result in my neck getting shorter due to damage which will result in my height shrinking and therefore my self-esteem being worse and not being as appealing to women. This is at the root of my problem as ridiculous as it sounds. I'm being completely honest. There are no repressed emotions as far as I can tell. Am I missing anything?

Thank you

 

Yes. Self awareness is not an exemption from having an unconscious. If it was, many of us would never have had TMS. As Sarno says in the BOOK, 'Many people had been in psychotherapy for years but none the less came down with TMS...even psychiatrists and psychologists."
I had been in the 12 step program and written reams of inventory but still came down with TMS.

 

There are levels of understanding and self knowledge. I think you could benefit from exploring why your self esteem is so linked to your height and your perceived assessment that women wouldn't see you as appealing if you're not tall enough. Where's that coming from? Keep peeling the onion till you get to the core issue, which is often related to formative experiences in childhood.

 

I mean I dont know about the getting shorter and women thing lol, but I don't necessarily fit in as the perfect tms patient either, yet using some of the techniques I have seen improvement. I dont think you have to fit in to the book perfectly.

 

I'll continue to read his book and do the 40 day program and see what happens. Perhaps as I write out my thoughts I'll come up with something eventually that I can't see now.

 

That's hard to say without going into a lot of personal details in my life. For reference, I'm 6'4.5'' so I'm not short by any means, and I think because I feel like height is one of my only assets, I tend to cling onto it with some sort of desperation. I don't feel like there is anything else about me that stands out in anyway because of the reception from other people that I've gotten throughout my whole life. I've always felt very average outside of my height and so I feel like a lot of my self-esteem clings to my height so that puts a lot of pressure and anxiety on me and I feel like these muscle spasms are a potential threat to my height. Unfortunately, we live in a very superficial world and it's hard not to get sucked into that.

 

Yeah, I don't think everything he says in the book is a cookie cutter fit to everyone such as myself. I'm not sure that I'm necessarily having repressed emotions cause I'm very aware of why I'm anxious and getting tense, but nonetheless I still think I have TMS to some degree.

 

Fear is the biggest issue of all. You have the fear.

 

Yeah I'm definitely aware of that. Not sure why the book by Dr. Sarno seems to imply that certain TMS sufferers aren't aware of their tension (mental and physical) when it should be extremely obvious if you're mentally and physically tight. I've known since the very beginning.

 

I think your comment is part of a very “Tms-y” stance. Clearly many of us knew we had tension -we’ve tried multiple ways to get answers for it. It’s more of how you are generating the tension, which Sarno clearly says is repressed rage (and how it makes us feel about ourselves). I would re-examine what Sarno discusses.
I found that when I first (second, third) read The Divided Mind, I would actually skip over some of his most powerful messages..without even realizing it! My brain was so protective. Part of the whole TMS personality thing is recognizing how this mechanism has closed you off to feeling open to possibilities you do not recognize.. perhaps you think you are aware, but of course it’s the subconscious stuff we are not aware of that’s truly at work.

 

I will continue to read Sarno's book and journal and see what happens. Thanks for your response!