Resources for accepting and not resisting the pain?

Also, the longer I do this work the more I see I have a preoccupation problem. How do I focus my attention on other things when I dont have a lot going on?

 

Dr. Sarno suggests getting back to life! Get more going on! Begin engaging in your interests and activities.

 

Even if just at home, I’ve found it helps to engage myself in something I really enjoy — play a game, watch a good movie, cook, etc.

For me, the pain is less when I’m engaged. I’ve been struggling with acceptance too. And the distinction between acceptance and resignation. The closest I’ve come to understanding it is through readings and podcasts about acceptance (unrelated to TMS) … it cannot be something you “try” to do. And the result of successful acceptance is not changed emotions. Acceptance is the act of recognizing the current situation for exactly what it is and not trying to change it. “I accept that I am preoccupied by my pain right now” “I accept that I am struggling to relax right now because I am in pain” … notice how what you are accepting includes how you feel. You are recognizing and letting it be. This is how you feel today. This is where you’re at. It may not be ideal, and you may not like it, but it is ok for today.

The days I fight against my emotions and my pain the most are the worst days for me. I am extremely anxious, my pain feels heightened, and I cannot focus on anything else. I spiral.

The days that I can approach my pain and emotional state with a lens of acceptance, I almost always end up feeling better by days end. I am calmer and more at peace, even if the pain is still there. It is amazing how much our resistance feeds the pain. Partly because that resistance requires paying attention to the pain, which feeds the cycle. If it’s accepted matter of factly as the way things are in that moment, you can open your mind to focus on other things in your life.

I know I’m rambling and I’ve found everyone needs to come to their own understanding of acceptance because it really does feel like an elusive concept, especially in its application. Best of luck.