Week 0 Starting again

Well I'm back. I think it might be helpful to do this once more. I've been researching habit cough and psychgenic cough and it turns out they are the same. I think I know everything about habit cough, it starts with an initial infection, bronchitis in my case but persists for a long while. From what I know normal stimuli such as air, drinking water or even normal drainage that never caused a cough can now trigger one. Ok so I know this now and it fits.

Is there is psychological component? Well there is certainly a coincidence of when bronchitis happened. It happened during a major move. I moved for a new job. The move cost a lot of money. It made me feel insecure about finances which have been a lifelong thing until recently. My new job is great but I'm feeling it out Since I'm new I sometimes get weird vibes from people as though I somehow took their job. Most people are great but one or two rude people who made me feel invisible. For the most part it's good and the pay is good. I still haven't recouped my move. Im also building a new course for my job, I know the material but I didn't have enough time to have it totally plotted before i got hired. I'm usually 2 weeks ahead of each class I teach. It makes me a little uneasy at times however.

The weekends feel great, I sleep in and spend time with the dogs and my wife. We watch movies in bed in the evenings. I catch up on house work and some personal things I'm interested in.

Could all of this keep a cough going? Well it's certainly gotten better since the initial bronchitis. I used to have coughing fits.

When I was dealing with bronchitis I was certainly worried it was something more severe at times. I've dealt with hypochondria before and it creeps in and out with worst case scenarios. Rationally I know my symptoms fit habit cough.

The coughing fits feel like they are happening internally if that makes sense. Like holding in all the energy or a cough in my body and I feel tension in my back, then my chest and shoulder blades, up to my neck. Then it moves to feeling the urge to cough for some time, then a panic feeling like I'm going to pass out because I'm not getting enough air and then I challenge it by doing something physical like jumping Jack's or something aerobic for a short while and nothing happens obviously.

I also started having weird pains in my upper neck kind of randomly out of the blue. So, I'm stuck in a pattern of letting go and getting stuck Again.

I'm going to do more journal work and see how this progresses.