Still on my journey, but I’ve come a long way!

Hey, all. Just popping in to say hi. It’s been a while and a lot has happened. I’m riding a bike, living with a great girl, working two jobs, even took a few vacations—all things that seemed more than impossible less than two years ago.

Am I done? No. I’m not sure we ever are, right? In that the mind-body link doesn’t go away. But I’ve eliminated some gnarly symptoms even if the scariest, earliest ones persist (though at least those are up and down and not constant). I know I’ve been tempted to post a coveted “success story” several times, only to be reminded I still have a ways to go.

But I’m sleeping again. I’m living my life. And I’m largely beating the fear. I’ll get there. Love to you all. I’m grateful for this community and hope I can one day post in depth about a complete recovery!

 

Thank you, Jan! My journey has been a bumpy one but I do feel like I'm on the other side of the worst of it. So if my story inspires anyone else out there who believes this is the path, but still struggles with the ups and downs of it, then I'm happy to share it. I got 100% sucked back into the fear in late 2021 and the benefit of that terrible, terrible experience was being able to promise myself I wouldn't do that ever again. And it's made all the difference.

 

Yes, post your Success Story. I've had several relapses since posting mine, but relapse is part of the process. Overcoming TMS is a lifelong endeavor for many of us.

Congratulations on your success!

 

Agreed. Humans will always be impacted by the mind-body connection because emotional pain and stress are part of life. It’s completely OK to experience TMS symptoms throughout our lives - the trick is managing our emotional pain and stress, and not fearing TMS.

 

Hi tmstraveler,

I have read your relapse story and I was like oh no, not again for you aswell. I remember you from a couple of years ago. Its great to hear you are feeling so much better right now. Can you share me what has helped you the most?

Currently I am having the biggest relapse ever. But what do you expect with a miscarriage, a new job, two family members hospitalized and relationship problems due to all of this. I am in 24/7 pain this time in the rectal area with no relief, barely managing to go through the day. It is somewhat better now than a couple of weeks ago, now i've felt some big repressed emotions, but still very hard to live with. I know the fear is holding me back. It's the fear of losing everything I have now, since I was so happy with finally choosing to do what I want. I loved my life as it turned out finally. I am still living my life now as in working, eating out, playing tennis, seeing friends, but it is soooo hard. Gladly, I now love myself, feel alot of self compassion and have grown alot during the last couple of years so that helps.

I am not afraid its something structural, but am afraid of losing my freedom and being bedridden. I am practising somatic tracking for the first time since the last couple of weeks and am noticing 24/7 anxiety aswell. Will this decrease eventually? Do you have any tips how to move through this? It's just that this symptom sometimes makes me believe I cant get better because it's in a tough spot thats hard to ignore. I know thats the fear talking. Did you recognize that at your lowest point?

Misty152

 

I wanted to post something relevant, but I found this and is exactly what I was thinking... I just wanted to say I am here and still walking this path, having many victories.
I was thinking that my progress is very slow, but I am very proud of it!
Four years, four diagnosis, much pain, anxiety, fear, despair and so on, learned so many things about mbs and myself too, I have succeeded to be almost symptom free from time to time and increase my quality of life but... during my relapses I realise that there are some emotions haven't been faced yet ( I am not surprised any more).
I face currently such a relapse ( have intense back pain, lots of dizziness besides I am going to thyroid test due to some strange hormonal test). The difference is that more than other times, I don't accuse myself of being in pain or hormonal imbalance, accept my vulnerability and there is a place in me that is not afraid anymore ( the rest of me is still afraid )
I am very grateful to this forum, where I find hope and sources to help myself and I send my love and sympathy to all those who compassionately care for and give answers or guidance to those in need.