Day 31 Stress and letting go.

free write about any current stress or anxiety in your life.

I don't feel stressed at this moment- I feel exhausted, confused and a bit hopeless but I don't feel capable of taking on stress. I had some additional news on my apartment this morning- not necessarily bad but I just didn't know how to handle it. I felt like I shut down instead of stressing. I decided to get something to eat and just sat down on the curb of the sidewalk for a few minutes before going into the cafe.

I didn't gain any insight or calmness while I was sitting there and things didn't improve while I was eating. It was a bit weird- I chose to eat something with spinach even though I hate spinach. Maybe it means nothing- it's a place I often eat at and often order the same thing so I thought it would be good to have a change.

I think my comment about not feeling stressed has to do with my life feeling suspended. It's like none of my actions has any consequence- no matter what I do I end up in a similar place. It's not one I like but it's not hellish either. I continue to have a place to stay and be able to eat but I'm not able to make forward progress.

My personality increases my stress because my fears magnify problems. I'm not usually able to let things go- although I am getting much better at this. The phrase "let go and let god" has become useful to me even though I still haven't figured out what my God looks like. I just know that I can't handle the stress of getting my life so safe that I can avoid worry: it's better to avoid worry and let life take care of itself.

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How are your professional relationships right now?

I am applying for jobs again. That's the good news. The bad news is that I've let my career fall apart and I'm not sure how hard it will be to work my way back. I also need to do more job applications.

 

Sounds like you have a firm grip on the main lesson- letting go
the money situation will be fine as you heal and your conditioning sets in
to fade mode- you should notice the your financial security emotions
will arise to healthy levels of hope, generating a law of attraction for health
and financial security.

Folks that heal seem to just do better with money
Every one I've ever known that got better at thinking healing
always seemed to prosper in more ways than one ya know.
When were feeling better we attract all life force no matter the form.
I think your heading to a great future, Keep us up to date, thanks....