Surgery being recommended

My wife and I have read extensively about TMS and we believe that TMS is causing many of my issues. Experiencing severe stress a great deal of the time.

I have severe spinal stenosis with bouts of excruciating pain when I am stressed. Back surgery has been suggested.

I also have been told that I need knee replacement in both knees, starting with the bone on bone left knee with no cartilage due to a surgical procedure done for a soccer injury at age 16.

I have no pain in my left knee. My left leg is bowing out and causing me to walk on the left side of my swollen left foot. I also have muscle weakness and some numbness in my left and also right foot.

Plus when I am walking, excruciating pain along upper glutes in my sciatica area, plus stretching pulling sensation along back of both legs.

I am at a loss about what to do. I fear that the knee replacement surgery with create more pain due to TMS.

Your thoughts would be greatly appreciated.

 

@Catskillsgrampa
I’m sorry for your pain and discomfort.
My suggestion to you, is to contact a TMS doctor and have them review your case and work with them to figure out what medical and TMS work might be appropriate for you.
We aren’t medical Dr.’s here, just a bunch of people with TMS.
At the same time, further educating yourself on TMS is a great idea. I would suggest reading a book by Dr. Sarno if you haven’t, and see how what he says resonates with you. The other book I’d recommend is Nichole Sach’s first book, The Meaning Of Truth telling her story of her “operable” back diagnoses she has never had an operation for (she is a mentee of Sarno, and was also his patient).
The PPDA association website has lists of practitioners by state, including any medical Doctors.
I think these things could help you making a decision on how you want to proceed.

 

Thank you so much. We have read lots on Sarno and TMS, plus spoken to a couple of doctors skilled in TMS. Also in a couple of FB groups.

The biggest issue is if by getting stress under control, which could take a while, will my ability to walk be impacted due to delaying surgery?

The surgeon of course wants to operate right away. We are trying to weigh the risk factors.

Thanks again~

 

@Catskillsgrampa If you haven't already read it, this book entitled 'Do You Really Need Spine Surgery?: Take Control With a Surgeon’s Advice'
might help you decide about the back surgery that's been suggested to you https://www.amazon.com/dp/0988272962?tag=psychologytod-20&linkCode=ogi&th=1&psc=1 (Amazon.com) It was written by Dr David Hanscom a back surgeon (situated in Oakland, California) who cured his own back pain by using mind/body techniques (principally through journaling, all of which is explained in his other book 'Back In Control' https://www.amazon.com/Back-Control-Surgeons-Roadmap-Chronic/dp/0988272997/ref=pd_bxgy_d_sccl_1/147-7264301-9737315?pd_rd_w=RsOZj&content-id=amzn1.sym.3858a394-39a9-4946-90e6-86a3153d2546&pf_rd_p=3858a394-39a9-4946-90e6-86a3153d2546&pf_rd_r=VBVP0FRG0EYKCP74DMZX&pd_rd_wg=8HL6h&pd_rd_r=13d81bdc-94f3-4ccc-a1f0-053dec32d0fc&pd_rd_i=0988272997&psc=1 (Amazon.com)). This webpage gives some details about Dr Hanscom and some references and links to Dr Hanscom's TMS resources https://mytmsjourney.com/experts/dr-david-hanscom/ (Dr David Hanscom)

 

Thanks so much~ We have read his books and have gotten to know him via phone. Outstanding!

We are exploring a number of sources... trying to stay out of overload!

 

Surgeon's usually push timetables. If you've spoken to Dr. Hanscom, he's probably mentioned it. It's so much pressure for them to perform and earn for their practices but also the internal drive to help heal their patients in the only way they have been educated.
I have nerve damage in my feet from my spinal issues. I've been diagnosed with a host of "scary" things, and have had at least 35 various symptoms just in the past 3 years or so (far more TMS symptoms over a lifetime). I don't worry too much about how my feet function. I mean you've got to stop the worry and fear at some point and I made a conscious effort to recognize that if there is some sort of actual physical "thing" going on with my feet, then it is what it is. The weight of responsibility to "fix" oneself will simply break you.
It's common for the mind, once realizing TMS to think that you somehow caused it, and are now responsible for "fixing" it. I have a feeling you might be at this point.
Then on top of it is the desperation and anxiety, and you are both desperate and have a physician pressuring you with a time line.
Haven't even mentioned how you got to this point with stressors through your life. It's a lot.
I am hoping you can see all this, and how much compassion you need for yourself. That you recognize it's NOT your fault and that you are not responsible for "fixing" it (or at least all of it). That there are probably many things that seem "broken" right now but are not at all.

Have you run across Claire Weekes? Her books helped me not only to deal with anxiety, desperation, fear, but also mindset. They helped me clear my mind so I could deal with things much more easily. No matter what path you choose, or if you choose a blend of things for your healing, Claire will help guide you through. Her books are a blessing but her audio books are pure gold because she reads them, in her quaint way that is both soothing and encouraging.

I honestly don't think you can get any better than talking do Dr. Hanscom. Dr. Hanscom's books also discuss the need for journaling (as does Nichole Sach's).

What kind of things do you enjoy participating in that you feel help soothe your nervous system?

 

How is your diet? Do you drink a lot of soda pops or mineral water? They are terrible for depleting the absorption of vitamins and minerals in the body and affect the bones' health too.

 

@Cactusflower and @BloodMoon have offered excellent suggestions. Most of us are not doctors and can't offer medical advice. I'm personally skeptical that delaying surgery would affect your ability to walk in the future. But again... I'm not doctor, and it sounds like you have access to a good TMS doctor. So, I'd direct your questions about surgery there.

All the fear and stress compound TMS. Even if you did have surgery, it does not preclude you from recovering from TMS in the future. So don't look at it as an either / or situation. Either way, you're going to be okay.

 

@Catskillsgrampa
I watched this today, and thought of you because Miriam discusses TMS fear in people with structural issues or purely neuroplastic pain.

I hope this helps!

 

What are you doing about suppressed rage?

Most of us could have BEEN physio's by the time we got here...it wasn't the information, but the information processed and integrated into our lives. This is an Individual activity, not a group endeavor.

I say that because you say "We" along with your wife. When I recovered a large part of my repressed rage was around my 'wonderful' marriage...that upon closer examination, wasn't.

If reading that bothers you, it is probably one of the main issues. I am not saying it to be mean, but we are honest with each other here....dependency issues and resentment are at the heart of the TMS of virtually every man I have ever worked with.