the tms creates the same feelings as my chldhood trauma

Hey all, I wanna share this insight! (i'm at day 10)
I' m having quite some pain in my shoulder at the moment (bursitis) and I started to write down my emotions right now, how I feel in this pain: I feel worthless, useless, an outsider, introverted, hopeless, uncapable, left alone, shut down...

And guess what? These feelings are more or less the beliefs I created in my youth and the convictions of my stepfather about me ( which worked for me as a self fulfilling prophecy). The feeling of left alone is connected to that my first dad disappeared out of my life in my early childhood. I'm sure my beliefs of worthlessness etc. also where a way of trying to protect me.
I'm not anymore in these situations which hurted me emotionally. But now the physical pain has taken over to make me feel the same... In other words; still trying to protect me?? Trying to make the self fulfilling prophecy become true! And yes! The tms symptoms where very succesfull in preventing me of being succesfull. Because if I'd become succesfull I would fall down only deeper!
So it looks like the tms symptoms connect me with the feelings of my early childhood trauma, instead of taking me away from it (like dr. Sarno says)...
Writing this I feel deep sadness and rage.