Day 1 Thrilled to be here

Hi, I've suffered from sciatica, back pain and shoulder pain for 20 years. I first heard about John Sarno a few years ago, and it helped somewhat, because I am a classic textbook case. I really believe it is true.

But I was frustrated that I couldn't seem to find most of the emotional problems I was looking for that I was trying to distract myself from. I have spent many many years doing that kind of work, not for TMS, but for emotional development, and feel happily free of anger, resentment and guilt. So slowly I got back to the idea that my problems were all physical.

Now with a recent flareup I've started looking again, and have realized that while I may have resolved most of the issues I would associate with the beginning of my pain, there are two things I've not understood before, that reading the TMS forum helped me to discover. The first is that I have let the pain itself become a huge source of stress and freak out in my life. The second is that I am a major over doer. While I wouldn't have said it was stressful, clearly the pressure I've put on myself to get lots done has been out of hand. My body has done me a favor I think, by forcing me to slow down when I didn't have the sense to do it for my peace of mind. So I'm extremely hopeful, that with the help of this program, this time I will eventually become free of pain like so many others.

 

I think Dr Sarno makes the point, Terry, that one of the worst stressors leading to TMS symptoms is not external pressure, but the pressure we put on ourselves. Being a compulsive over-achiever is a great way of beating yourself and your inner child into submission, but is awfully enraging to the id. Excellent that the entries in this TMS forum helped you to this realization. You may want to start working with the Structured Education Program (SEP) available down the left side of the TMS Wiki page:

http://www.tmswiki.org/ppd/The_Tension_Myositis_Syndrome_Wiki

I've noticed that being able to look at a wide sampling of TMSers on this forum has helped me see certain common themes in the lives of people who develop TMS. Sounds like that is happening to your too. Welcome aboard and, of course, all the best.

 

Terry, Hello. Welcome. I would also say that you may have rid yourself consciously from anger, resentment and guilt through all your emotional/psychological work over the years, but remember TMS is all about the unconscious. So while consciously you were happy, unconsciously you must still have rage (and other emotions) that remain hidden, thereby distracting you (quite successfully it seems) with intense, stress inducing physical pain. The fact that you are also an over-doer (like I am!) just adds another layer and gives more of a reason for your inner-child (id) to be really pissed off. You have every reason to be hopeful that peeling back the layers on a much deeper level will finally relieve the pain. I had my first bout of intense TMS pain 10 years ago in my feet/hands. I healed myself within 3 months after reading Sarno's books and starting up psychotherapy again. Now 10 years later the pain is back, but I am learning (through re-reading Sarno and his colleagues works, and this website) that pain is a learned response and that my mindbody connection or pathways runs to my feet whenever there are intense emotional triggers. I see that clearly now and I realize that I have to continue to delve deep in order to break that connection, to rid myself of the pain now, but also prevent it in the future. Best of luck. I have found this structured Educational Program in conjunction with my therapy session to be extremely helpful.

 

Hi Terry, I too so relate to what you wrote about being someone who does a tremendous amount of work on myself. I see the pain as a gift that has help me go deeper into the abandonment I felt as a child. I became an over achiever to cope with that loss. Thanks for sharing. Best, Susan

quote="Terry, post: 4421, member: 519"]Hi, I've suffered from sciatica, back pain and shoulder pain for 20 years. I first heard about John Sarno a few years ago, and it helped somewhat, because I am a classic textbook case. I really believe it is true.

But I was frustrated that I couldn't seem to find most of the emotional problems I was looking for that I was trying to distract myself from. I have spent many many years doing that kind of work, not for TMS, but for emotional development, and feel happily free of anger, resentment and guilt. So slowly I got back to the idea that my problems were all physical.

Now with a recent flareup I've started looking again, and have realized that while I may have resolved most of the issues I would associate with the beginning of my pain, there are two things I've not understood before, that reading the TMS forum helped me to discover. The first is that I have let the pain itself become a huge source of stress and freak out in my life. The second is that I am a major over doer. While I wouldn't have said it was stressful, clearly the pressure I've put on myself to get lots done has been out of hand. My body has done me a favor I think, by forcing me to slow down when I didn't have the sense to do it for my peace of mind. So I'm extremely hopeful, that with the help of this program, this time I will eventually become free of pain like so many others.[/quote]

 

Thanks so much for all your replies. I am sure the support of others who have been there will be invaluable for me. I'm on Day 3 of the support program, and the structure is great for me.