Day 8 Timing

Timing is everything they say. In response to my TMS experience so far, it was flat-out time to commit to this program rather than lurking as I have for years. It is also said that when the pain gets bad enough, one does something about it.

I had already read and reread the books over the years, watched the videos, practiced meditation, self-talk and so on. And after making a major change in location to move closer to my only child after the death of my husband, I discovered that my problems ran much deeper than I realized. I continued to have various pain, developed GERD, my atrial fibrillation increased and these scary incidences plus major depression and grief, drove me into counseling where I have been brutally honest.

But I needed and wanted more, even as I was beginning to improve. And then one day, after reading many times before, the moderators praise for the SEP, I said, “It’s time.”

I feel like this program, in tandem with my excellent therapist, will lead me into the light again. I have proven to myself that even though I understood what Dr. Sarno has stated, what others have supported, what evidence there is, I required a disciplined method that included journaling which I’ve briefly tried before and abandoned. To be honest, my feelings were too raw when I journaled and they left me exhausted.

So with committing to SEP, I am again journaling, crying, crying, crying. No half-assed this time. I don’t want to live the rest of my life, however long or short, without purpose or joy. So far, this program is helping me. Even my pain is diminished. Praises!