TMS grasping the diagnosis

I was diagnosed with TMS (by a MD) about 2 years ago . I was getting better, but there were some nagging symptoms that just wouldn't let up. TMS set many limits on my life and maybe I wasn't embracing the diagnosis 100 %. So like an idiot I let a surgeon do a fusion on the area that they all thought it was coming from. It's been 11 weeks post op and you guessed it I am no better off than before the surgery and in fact somewhat worse. The pain is jumping around almost like it is making fun of me. I realize now for the very 1st time that it is truly TMS. Why would my right arm feel weak while I am trying to type this message to you all.
I believe I had TMS years ago and didn't know what it was. I would get a symptom ...go to a doctor and all the tests would come up empty, or negative. From an early age I had terrible separation anxiety from my mom (she was hospitalized for 4 months) when I was 5 and that truly affected me. Moving on I would get nose bleeds, bad seasonal allergies, acne and there skin issues, anxiety about what others thought about me, terrible buttock pain, low back pain, burning sensations in extremities, terrible foot nerve pain, cardiac palpatations, tendonitis in the chest wall, urinary frequency with pain (doctors thought were kidney stones) had a cysto and they found nothing. Up to that point I knew it was some strange disorder until I was diagnosed with TMS. So here I am horrible low back, buttocks and foot pain all over again.
Finally last night I had a dream where I was in a terrible rage and it was at my mom who died 2003 and I said to her "how could you let this happen ?" In my mind i am actually angry at her for something I can't explain here. I finally feel like my subconscious is letting me feel the repressed emotions, or at least let me have a taste of my repressed anger that I am feeling. Do I feel better ..maybe a little but I am working on trying to ignore the physical pain and deal with my repressed anger. My question people is this ...am I on the right track to figuring this out ? I need some help here...I really do.

 

Wow... impressive story...

Yes, you are on the right track. The separation anxiety and the dream about your mother are very important clues in my mind. I advise you to talk to a psychologist to help you open the flood gate.

I myself am not a psychologist and can only give you my perspective on your situation. I feel that you need to accept that there is a little child inside you that is still scared to death about and angry at his mom for abandoning him. Once you accept that you are only human, you can start to comfort him and tell him that there is no need to be scared or angry any longer.


Take care and wishing you the best

 

What Gigalos says.

 

Hi Click,

I thought I had resolved all my anger issues with my dad until he passed away. In fact, I used to put my arms around him and try to give him the love he never received as a child. After he passed away, I felt all this anger welling up. I could not figure out why. It was not anger for his mental and physical abuse of me, but he did not listen to me to make changes that would have saved our family many years of pain and suffering.

So I met with a counselor who told me this was quite common and I had still some residual anger that I had not fully let go of. Talking to the counselor really helped. If you have not done so, it is worth a try.

Regarding my dad's passing, I wrote a post because just like back pain, when it comes to chest pain current medical treatment can be hazardous to our health. Everyone should be armed with this information when experiencing chest pain.

http://www.fredamir.com/single-post/2016/07/11/Heart-Attack-Avoid-Angiogram-Angioplasty-and-Bypass-Surgery (Back Pain)

Take care,