Huckleberry

I'm a 45 year old guy from the UK and wanted to run my 'story' past the forum to get some thoughts and opinions on my situation...all input is gratefully received.

I figured it was best to put some background information which may be relevant in bullet points initially as I'm aware nobody wants to wade through a novel.

* I have read all of Sarno's books and a plethora of other material about TMS / Mindbody illness. I buy into the concept totally but surprise surprise have huge problems relating it to my condition. I cannot move past a structural explanation for my pain.

* I have been told by a TMS (stress illness) practitioner in the UK that they are certain I am suffering from TMS. This guy is also a physiotherapist who applies that modality to acute injury and pain...he believes that chronic pain is pretty much always psychological in origin and a result of an overstimulated nervous system and 'always on' neural pathways...this is often the direct result of stress and unexpressed emotions.

* I have a history of health anxiety and somatisation and am extremely fixated on body noise and function.

* I fit the traits etc of the typical TMS sufferer to a T. If I was to look at another person in my situation I would say that it was a no brainer that they have TMS.


So, with that background I started to have a mild back pain about 3 years ago. This would come and go and never trouble me too much. I started an exercise regime 18 months ago and lost about 4 stone in weight....my back ached during this period but there was never a pattern to it.
As my back pain increased it also became more sciatic in nature and gave me pain in my left leg...the pain has never been that bad, more of an ache...yep, I would call it a distraction if pushed.
I visited various chiros and osteos at this time and was diagnosed with all the usual stuff like piriformis syndrome, SI joint dysfunction, twisted/tilted pelvis and leg length discrepancy. I believe this
has planted a huge nocebo in me.
Over time the pain and aches have increased and I have become more and more concerned that I'm doing damage to my body. My current symptoms are hip pains (mainly one side but can be both) left sided buttock pain which goes down the back of my leg but never below the knee (piriformis?) and pain located in my lower back just over my SI joints. The TMS practioner I have seen is adamant that my range of movement is normal etc and that as I'm still active with zero loss of function he is convinced that my pain is as a result of stress illness...he strongly believes I don't present with any observable signs of structural problems and that the pain cannot be a result of a structural issue.
I do have a huge amount of stress in my life and believe I'm handling it ok ish but this is obviously on a conscious level...I'm not so sure how my unconscious feels about it. I have lost both my parents in the last 3 years and am currently trying to sell a house that is proving difficult...I also detest my job and feel totally unsatisfied and unfulfilled.

So, that's the bones of it so to speak. I don't really know what the forum can offer me that the TMS chap I have seen couldn't but I suppose I'm stuck in that trap of analysing to the tiniest degree and hoping somebody can give me that nugget of wisdom that will 'cure' me. I have to admit that whilst I'm genned up on the concept of TMS and haven't really done the work so to speak and still employ the same faulty negative patterns and live my life like Groundhog Day...I don't know why I'm expecting things to change if I carry on doing and thinking the same things.

...thanks for reading.