Ann s is

My TMS Story


About ten years ago, after I lost a job, I developed severe back pain. I became convinced that I would end up in a wheelchair. One day when I was feeling well enough, I walked around the mall and saw a copy of Dr. Sarno’s book, “Healing Back Pain.” Thumbing through it while standing in the bookstore, I had an “A-ha” moment and was healed of most of my back pain on the spot. Pain was completely gone in a week.

Eventually I bought the book and was totally sold on the concept, naturally, since I had been healed simply by reading the book and accepting what was written. I read about many, many other pains and pain equivalents that I had had over the years.

Still, I developed many pain and pain equivalents, probably dozens, although none in my back. (Sciatica, pyriformis syndrome, migraine aura, went temporarily blind in one eye twice, neck pain, huge eye floaters, tinnitus, seborrheic dermatitis, hot flashes for 13 years, excess head sweating, rectal cramps, cramps in my esophagus, plantar faciitis, painful tendon on side of foot, ball of foot pain, knee swelling, wrist pain and swelling, painful forearm muscles/tendons, etc.)

I considered these symptoms might be TMS, but consistently and foolishly decided that they were not TMS and stayed in pain until they either just disappeared or I accommodated them and remained in pain.

For example, I was a daily 2-4 mile walker for fifteen years, but I stopped walking for exercise believing that my painful feet were caused by worn out fat pads (all that walking) and that a constantly throbbing pain on the side of my foot was a shredded tendon. I even used the little motor carts at Wal-Mart and did not do anything at the gym that involved my feet.

This last summer I bought Steve Orzanich’s book, “The Great Pain Deception,” and while reading it decided there was nothing wrong with my feet and started walking again. I had to “speak forcefully” to my feet and walk through the pain but when I stopped giving into the pain, it vanished. I made up my mind that if I had to crawl all the way around the development, I was not giving into the pain! I “got mad at it” and kept walking, and it stopped.

But soon, while walking, I felt a “weird” sensation behind my right knee like a little rubber band broke. There was no pain, but the knee swelled up and got very stiff, causing limited range of motion. There was NO PAIN. This has been tentatively diagnosed as OA and maybe a meniscus tear; a surgeon wants to operate. I think it is TMS and am working on this and refusing surgery.


But right now, my main problem started about a year and a half ago when I developed “wrist tendonitis” in my right wrist while mowing the lawn. Inexplicably it also developed in my left wrist a few months later. More than half a dozen doctors and other medical professionals told me I had tendonitis, did not have tendonitis, did not have OA, did have OA, would be hard to heal, may never heal, needed surgery, did not need surgery, it is not RA, acts like RA, etc. I have decided it is TMS and am now working on getting rid of that pain as well. Some days it is fine, and my "OA/tendonitis" just disappears, but other days it is painful, hot and swollen.

In both the knee and the wrists, there was swelling and heat. These additional symptoms helped to keep me from thinking it was not TMS, but now I think that it is TMS and am working on both ignoring the pain and swelling and living my life without limiting my activities. I recently went back to the gym and am lifting, rowing and walking the treadmill, even if it hurts. I refuse to give into it!


I am not completely healed yet, but I am determined to heal totally by doing what I know to do, by continuing to read the TMS books and in the forums daily. I want to be completely over this, not getting one body part symptom free only to be hit with another painful body part. It will never end! Well, I am absolutely determined IT WILL END!

Everyone who overcomes TMS is an inspiration, but particularly Steve Orzanich. If he overcame TMS, with all the symptoms he had, anyone can overcome TMS.

Today I read this in the TMSHELP forum and plan to meditate and act on this:

From “Balto” Success Story on TMSHELP forum:

“One day I just realized that all my symptoms were started by my emotion, by the intense stress, but my symptoms stay with me because I fear it. It was being keep alive by my fear. I feared the symptoms, I feared what the symptoms mean to my body, I worry about the future of my health. And if I can somehow stop that fear I would be cured, and that's exactly what I did. I just refuse to fear anymore. I am sick of being sick and I'm not going to take it anymore. No more fear for me. Yes Sir, no more fear. Whatever is going to happen will happen, but I'm not going to fear anymore.” He got totally healed!