AnitaV

My TMS Success Story (crippling foot pain - plantar fasciitis, wrist pain, eye pain)

Since discovering the work of Dr. John Sarno 8 months ago, my life has undergone a transformation that I had never dreamed was possible.

My journey of chronic pain began when I was 15 years old. I developed chronic, crippling pain in my left foot that was diagnosed as plantar fasciitis. After many different treatments it finally went away after a year, but returned when I was 18 years old. The pain continued, and after a year, I was completely unable to walk, and took a year off of college and had a surgery to straighten my left heel bone, which had become crooked because I walked incorrectly for so long due to the pain. After the surgery, I was able to walk without pain wearing shoes with orthotics, but I was unable to take a single step barefoot without terrible pain in my left foot that would then take days of rest to resolve. I had thought that I would never walk again prior to the surgery, so I was just grateful that I could walk without pain at all.

At the age of 22, I had my first attack of severe eye pain. After seeing many doctors, it was diagnosed as severe eye strain due to convergence insufficiency. The pain gradually went away over several months, but smaller attacks would occasionally recur.

At the age of 27, during a particularly stressful time in my life, the eye pain returned in full force. I was in constant, severe pain, and had to take disability leave from work (I am a software developer). I went to one doctor after another, but no one gave me any answers, and the pain only got worse. Several months later, terrible pain suddenly started in my right foot. I was completely unable to walk and unable to use my eyes, and I fell into a deep depression. I tried one treatment after another, but absolutely nothing helped.

Several months later, my eye pain had improved to the point where I was able to return to work, but I still could not walk, and was in a wheelchair. I continued trying one treatment after another for my foot, but nothing helped. My left foot started hurting as well. A year later, I suddenly developed severe pain in my wrists. The pain went up and down, but 6 months later, my wrists hurt so much that I was unable to eat without pain, and I started preparing to take disability leave from work. I also started having back pain, and pain in my right achilles tendon. I was unable to do anything, and I was in pain from head to toe.

I will never forget the day I discovered the work of Dr. Sarno. In November of 2013, I was searching desperately for solutions for my wrist pain on the internet, using voice recognition software, when I came across the Harvard RSI website (http://www.rsi.deas.harvard.edu/). I read all sorts of depressing advice about using plastic utensils and an electric toothbrush and voice recogition, when I came across a page describing a mind-body approach to RSI (http://www.rsi.deas.harvard.edu/mb_what_is.html). This page contains a link to a handout describing Dr. Sarno's theories in several pages. I downloaded it, and by the time I finished reading it, tears were streaming down my face. I knew that this was the first day of the rest of my life. I knew that this was the answer I had so desperately been searching for for years. I knew without a shadow of a doubt that my wrist pain was caused entirely by TMS, and I understood deep down that all of the chronic foot pain and eye pain that had plagued my for years was also caused by TMS, as well as all the new pain symptoms I had developed recently (back, achilles tendon).

I immediately ordered The Mindbody Prescription (audiobook and Kindle edition), after spending hours reading the book's reviews on Amazon. I started with the audiobook, because my eye pain prevented me from reading, but halfway through I switched to the Kindle edition and finished it without any eye problems. I read every day and followed Dr. Sarno's directions in the book to a tee. I did not take disability leave, but continued to work, and my wrist pain started improving rapidly. One week after first discovering Dr. Sarno, I trimmed green beans for Thanksgiving dinner. A week earlier, this would have been unthinkable with my level of pain and fear.

I continued reading The Mindbody Prescription every day. I also started reading The Divided Mind, and Dr. Marc Sopher's To Be or Not To Be... Pain-Free. I worked hard to understand TMS, and to discover my own repressed feelings. I also contacted Dr. Frank Padrone, a psychologist who worked with Dr. Sarno at NYU for 30 years. He has a private practice in Long Island, where I lived at the time, and I started seeing him every week for psychotherapy.

My wrist pain continued to improve rapidly, as did my eye pain, back pain, and achilles tendon pain. My foot pain, which had consumed so much of my life for the past 14 years, was much harder to tackle. It was very difficult for me to fully accept that this pain was TMS, and to let go of my paralyzing fear of walking. This was in part due to MRI and ultrasound imaging that showed significant inflammation in the plantar fascia of my right foot. Dr. Sarno never discusses TMS causing inflammation in his books, so it was difficult for me to fit this into his theories. However, I read about other people whose TMS caused inflammation as part of their pain symptoms, and this gave me more confidence.

Gradually, I became more and more confident that my foot pain was due to TMS, and finally, I had enough confidence to let go of my fear and begin to increase my walking. Once I fully accepted the TMS diagnosis and let go of my fear, my foot pain started improving rapidly.

Without about 3 months of discovering Dr. Sarno's work (and while continuing to read and reflect every day), my wrist pain, eye pain, back pain, and achilles tendon pain were gone almost entirely. I was using my hands normally, and rarely experiencing any pain. My foot pain took longer, in part because I had terrible muscle atrophy after 2 years of not walking or barely walking, and experienced all sorts of awful pains once I started using my foot again. With many ups and downs, my foot pain continued to improve, and I continued to grow stronger and increase my activity level.

I had been unable to stand or take a single step barefoot or without orthotics since I was 19 years old. I will never forget the day I took a shower barefoot, in January of 2014, just two months after first discovering Dr. Sarno. My foot was still in a great deal of pain, but I knew that I would not hurt it my standing on it barefoot. I knew that I was strong and resilient, not broken and fragile. I let go of the fear of my body that had controlled so much of my life since I was 15 years old, and I understood that my future held endless possibilites.

With ups and down, my pain continued to improve, and I continued to increase my walking more and more. In March, I started taking yoga classes. In May, I started taking adult beginner ballet classes, something I had dreamed of doing, but had never thought was possible. In June, I started walking around my house barefoot, something I had not been able to do since I was a teenager. I also started seeing a personal trainer, to get strong, and to discover what my body is capable of.

During all this time, I continued seeing Dr. Frank Padrone for psychotherapy. I discovered how and why and when I repress emotions. I discovered how important our inner emotional life is, and how often we ignore it and repress it. Dr. Padrone has changed the way I experience my life, and I continue to learn something new every time I see him.

It is now July of 2014, and I am pain-free from head to toe, and stronger than I have ever been. I still experience pangs of pain, especially in my feet, but when I do, I shift my focus to my emotions, and the pain eventually goes away. I owe an eternal debt of gratitude to Dr. Sarno and to his colleagues for giving me back my life, and giving me a new life that I had not dreamed was possible.

If anyone would like me to share more details about any part of my story, especially my recovery, please let me know. I could go into great detail about my recovery, and I would like to do anything possible to help anyone else with their own recovery. Reading success stories on the internet was an enormous part of my recovery, and I hope that my story helps other people as well. Please don't hesitate to contact me with any questions you may have.

Sincerely,
Anita