Anxiety,feeling off balance head pressure and other neuro symptoms

I am new to the forum and have had several TMS symptoms since the birth of my second child who is now 7. Looking back maybe i have had them way before but never really thought of them as TMS. I was always taking days off school for “headaches” and “tummy aches” my teacher in fact in my school report when i was 11 said she believed i tend to worry alot which is causing me to have these symptoms and told my parents to help me unload my worries from time to time…

Symptoms i have had have included back pain,
neck pain, sciatica, gastritis, headaches/migraines/tension headaches, muscle twitching, numbness, shaky hands, palpitations, tmj, ibs, head pressure, pain in ears, tinnitus the list goes on. I have had several MRIs endoscopys colonscopy and other tests and once i got the all clear they went away. It was like a relief and i often found myself crying thinking thankgod nothing was found and promised myself next time a symptom came up i wouldnt keep running back to the doctors because this was all TMS.


I gave birth to my 3rd child 3 yrs ago. Everything was great, yes i got symptoms here and there but i didnt focus on it and assumed TMS. Fast forward to last year i started getting terrible anxiety waking up anxious nauseous and then began new symptoms shoulder blade pain, internal cystitis, constipation migraines came back as well as other old symptoms. Back in Oct as i was putting my toddler to bed i had what i would say a bout of vertigo. That scared the hell out of me.


I panicked started sweating heart rate bp shot up and was sick i ended up calling an ambulance. I had a CT scan done of my head as well as piles of bloods and was sent my way with nothing found. Ever since then i have this “off balance” feeling when walking. Like im walking on ice and going to fall. I find my legs dragging. I get pressure in my head and feel lightheaded and it really scares me. I find it worse when going into supermarkets and crowded place at home im mostly fine.


I know this has to be TMS but im finding it hard to believe as the muscle twiching is back, the shaky hands dropping things the weakness and my anxiety is through the roof. The health anxiety in me has me googling and my brain keeps telling me i have MS. This is exactly what i thought 4 years ago and nothing was fine and try telling myself that its just my brain trying to scare me and i am fine but i cant get this thought out of my head. Part of me just wants to go for a MRI to rule it out but i am sick of doing this everytime i get symptoms as dont want to reinforce the doubts. Could all this i am experiencing TMS and its just rearing its ugly head again? Just for info i have read many books Dr Sarno, Alan gordon, claire weeks, dr schubiner etc i have so much knowledge and so eager to help others with TMS symptoms but dont know why cant apply it to myself.

 

You are finding it difficult to apply because your brain is simply doing it's TMS thing, protecting you. It's protecting you from the deepest, darkest things that anger you.
You have symptoms because you need to commit to yourself and actually do the work. Reading a book isn't doing the work, applying the knowledge, even when it's hard, even when we resist, even when we don't want to is the way out.
You are stuck in victimhood, letting all of this get the best of you, and your brain is saying "can't, don't, fear, hide, safety" because at some point as a child it learned stuff that no longer applies now. It learned to hide the emotions and ideas that you can be angry and raging and still love (which creates guilt and shame) and this is just buried in your subconscious (which has no awareness of time, and that you are no longer a child). The anxiety is another TMS symptom, protecting you from feeling these other emotions and keeping your life small, and your thoughts hyper focused and hyper vigilant.
You must take care of you. You can not properly care for others in your life until you take care of yourself.
I suggest you google Nichole Sach's and read a bit about her Journalspeak and her personal experience of conflicting emotions as a young mother .... even if you have, read it again. Accept the fact that this MIGHT be similar to what you are going through. Then sit down with pen and paper and do the same work.
You may find your mind goes to other subjects: thinks of all you need to do, you can't sit still, you get sleepy or some other notion your mind sets to so that you "can't" write. Ignore all that and WRITE. Let it all out then sit there and deal with those emotions gently and kindly, accepting them. When you have done that, tear that paper up and toss it out. Don't keep your journaling. Examine the stressors in your life, in your past but also examine what you THINK is going great for you: relationships, love of children and family, finances etc. etc. It is often where we are convinced we are happy and that things are great that we actually have hidden our deepest rage. These conflicting emotions translate into our body and brain feeling a lack of safety (for various reasons often developed in childhood). It's absolutely normal to have conflicting emotions.
It is hard for a mum, but see if you can find moments to chill out. Your symptoms are very much part of a ramped up nervous system. If you feel you can steal moments to just sit and close your eyes and focus on the breath, or meditate during nap time...or try some Qui Gong if your body needs to be active (Tanner Murtaugh on Youtube has some excellent short Qui Gong - your kids might find it fun too!)
https://www.youtube.com/@painpsychotherapy
If you can, try doing the Structured Educational Program (SEP at tmswiki.org, scroll down page) a little at a time. It will guide you through the work. Do it start to finish, because your brain needs to learn this commitment to yourself. I suspect you are so used to putting others first that it's hard to put yourself first. Do it and do it with all your heart.
You've read some Claire Weekes, now put it into action. It's actually the easiest thing out of all the TMS methods to employ, since it's 99% self-talk. Here she is reading her own work, talking about the need to escape the feelings of anxiety and panic (or any other symptoms), and the way out is to simply accept they are there. Once you learn these skills they are really easy to repeat anytime in your life you need them. Just take a moment and breathe and feel that emotion, those sensations swirling in mind and body and breathe.



I started by telling myself that I am perfectly safe: If you have a roof over your head, clothing and food, in this moment you are safe.

None of the symptoms are your fault in anyway, but it is your responsibility to yourself to change the way you respond to the thoughts and sensations so that you can stop this cycle. In the process you have the opportunity to teach your children all of these marvelous skills.

 

Hi, Light,
I have the off balance symptom, wake up at night with anxiety and drag my left numb foot. I have read a bunch of stories in here of people having these same exact symptoms. I know it’s TMS. In fact, two stories I read were of young mothers getting these symptoms right after a child was born. That might be a good topic for your journaling. Remember, you aren’t writing out what you think you should feel. You write out all the stuff your inner child wishes it could say. And it’s a really young inner child. Nicole Sachs is awesome! Check her out. Here’s her podcast that explains things. https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-cure-for-chronic-pain-with-nicole-sachs-lcsw/id1439580309?i=1000423049329 (‎The Cure for Chronic Pain with Nicole Sachs, LCSW: Meet JournalSpeak, Your New Best Friend on Apple Podcasts)

 

Health Anxiety.
The good news, your complex thinking, modern part of your brain knows that you are fine. It's the part saying you've been down this route before and you intellectually know you are likely fine and there's no need to keep getting test after test just to be told you are fine. But your amygdala part of your brain is like a scared little bunny.
It's the part that is saying, "HELP! What if? I'M SCARED. I need to be on top of this just in case.....Arghhh!" It wants to be comforted, but unfortunately it never is. Once this crisis is averted, a new one is just around the corner. Or you will begin to doubt the doctors/test results that said you are OK.

You are probably thinking about it night and day. Even when you are doing something else and distracted, that little part of your brain is still thinking about the disease du jour, right?

It might be worth starting first with calming that down a bit via Claire Weekes type help/guidance. A lot of what you are describing sounds like very standard physical manifestations of health anxiety.
It's hard to know where TMS fits in.
I'd say that when you are feeling a bit more settled, start digging in Sarno style find the hidden anger/rage that has contributed to your health anxiety.
Even if not TMS hidden anger/rage, I'm sure there is a lot of deep down scary emotions from childhood that would be good to release.
Note that some of us are born with very sensitive bodies with nervous systems that react and cause physical symptoms and we get on these cycles.

Note: I'm not a doctor or therapist.

 

Exactly! I wake up and feel a knot in my stomach and instantly i am body scanning to see how i feel and what symptoms i have. Taking the kids to school is a battle within myself i am anticipating that when walking and seeing the crowds of parents i will start feeling off balance and thats what happens. I get this sudden head pressure and tightness and being to feel off balance and find myself trying to lean against a wall or something to not make it obvious. Being a housewife for the last 4 years i spend most of my day with a 3 year old whilst my husband is at work. Despite being “busy” cleaning cooking etc all i think about is my symptoms

 

I agree deep down i know its TMS but then my thoughts go to worst case scenarios how will i look after my kids, what effect will this have on them i hope they dont end up like me. Its horrible. I find myself snapping at them and then feel so guilty after and upset after. I have always to wanted to make sure everything is right and have control and seen as a do gooder people pleaser perfectionist and cant say no. Anytime anyone has any symptoms in my family i am quick to try and help and make sure they are ok. My dad says you make a person feel better with just your words. But i struggle applying it to myself. My husband has been struggling with back pain for the last 6 weeks he has been told he has a buldging disc. He is adamant the gym has caused this but i have been trying to get him to look into TMS as i know thats whats causing it but he refused to believe it. But convincing myself is another story but brain will think no this time it has to be something serious and everytime i have been proved wrong!

 

i have started the SEP on this site im going in with an open mind and see where it leads me… i feel frightened and full of fear when symptom cone on so intensely. My mumo had a hospital appt which i usually take her to every 4 weeks and have done for the last 5 years. This morning i took the kids to school came home and did the usual cooking cleaning etc and bathed my 3 year old. I was feeling a bit anxious but carried on. I picked my mum up and as i was helping her into the car (shes had 2 strokes and uses a zimmer frame) i began feeling really lightheaded panicky my legs felt weak/shaky and i could barely walk i felt like i was going to pass out and walking felt like i was floating. Once i started driving i felt a little better. The hospital is around the corner and i got out to go get her a wheelchair again i began to feel the same but didnt want to tell mum as she would have panicked and is a worrier. I dont know how i got her to her appt the whole time i felt whoozy and panicky. I tried deep breathing and telling myself i am safe and i will be ok but i was also thinking if i pass out mums going be on her own. I was just glad to get out of there and back hone and have felt “off” for the rest of the day. And then begins the twitching in the legs, flu like symptoms migraine trying to come on. I wonder if this is an extinction burst after my post yday and reading the responses made me think this is all TMS?

 

Health anxiety is a bitch.
And being at home makes it worse, even though it feels better and safer.

I'm very familiar with that feeling that if you go out and have to interact with people you'll feel dizzy. Sometimes it can help to have different strategies. Have a bottle of water handy, a cool towel you can wipe your forehead or neck with if it's hot, a little candy that might up your blood sugar, or make sure you eat a little bite of something before hand. Even if you don't need them, knowing that you have them can make all the difference.