Deconditioning

How do you decondition the brain from not having fear around movements. I find myself unconsciously tensing my muscles in my lower spine when ever I move or go to do something even a simple task like opening my car door I instantly lock my muscles up which gives me pain. I think if I can figure out how to decondition myself I wont be so tense and in return wont be in pain.

 

You can try to do the scan body exercise, everyday you can check for example every hour, or whenever you are going to do those movements you mentioned, and from feet to head identify if there is tension in your muscles and then relax them. It is incredible how much tension you can find. If you do this frequently everytime it will be easier and faster for you to identify and relax the tension in your muscles.

 

Just bringing attention to tense areas and saying to yourself: "You're feeling tense now and this is hard for you." may help. In other words, just attend without pressure to relax. Have a little compassion for the tension. Accept it, become friends with it, without demanding it change.

I think Allund has a good plan, and I would do what I can to not "pressure it to relax."

 

Recognition is the first step. Be aware of what muscles you're tensing, then look into the "why."
I know that when the muscles contract in my lower right side of my spine that I'm due for a few minutes of meditation, which helps relax the pain away.

 

Positive affirmations do help, like "I know my back is strong&healthy".
You need to do it with strong energy and repetitions matters.

 

I've found it really helpful to apply Clare Weeke's strategy to accept the symptoms 100%, *no matter how bad they are*. If you accept them 99% it's still going to plague you, the preoccupation with it will drive you crazy, it's that extra 1% of acceptance that makes all the difference. When I am feeling pain, I remind myself to accept it 100%, and to "lean in" to the pain, and I've found it quite helpful and effective. The trick is to not expect a change in symptoms; that will come in time.

 

Thanks for this clear guidance. This is my experience also. I guess it is not everyone's?

 

I want to thank everybody for taking their time to respond and give me some pointers. I am currently reading Steven Ozanich's The great pain deception, and have already read HBP by Dr John Sarno. I notice when I am out of work my pain is a 4-5 but from 8 am-5pm everyday my pain is 8-10 I'm sure its because I don't like my job very much. Does anyone have a similar experience?

 

Absolutely, Andy. It's not everyone's, and also, I employ a number of different strategies as well, depending on the day, depending on where I'm at--I do think have a great variety of tools in one's TMS tool-box is very helpful.

The more I learn about how to heal TMS from a knowledge-standpoint, the better I am able to apply the concepts to a variety of TMS symptoms in different circumstances. It's getting to the point now that any time a symptom arises or a negative-thinking spiral starts, I have so many tools that I am able to arrest the negativity, redirect, sometimes stop symptoms, and more and more often stop my fear of symptoms.

When I'm feeing defeated, I remind myself how far I have come, how challenging it can be to change behaviour and conditioning, and how the most important aspect of change is to just keep going; again, I really like Claire Weeke's approach of "floating" and "waiting for time to pass" because often, us TMS'ers seem to want to solve the issue, to think, analyze, figure it out, and I have found that I can just acknowledge I'm having symptoms, feeling a little (or a lot) negative, and wait for time to pass, without trying to "figure it all out". At the beginning of my TMS journey, I definitely tried to figure it all out and would get frustrated if I wasn't doing it perfectly. This applies to life as well (as do all of the TMS learnings, of course); I'm learning to be less of a perfectionist, and to just allow things to be as they are--this is an on-going process, of course.

I also use SteveO's approach of just giving my symptoms a WHAT-FOR...getting pissed off at my symptoms and telling them to give me their best but it's not going to matter, I am going to live my life. It's been important for me to distinguish between obsessively getting angry at my symptoms, and getting angry at my inner bully for trying to lure me into obsessing about my symptoms. Subtle, yet critical difference for me.

And then again, at other times, I use the self-soothing approach of loving my inner child and telling her she is safe and loved and okay and doing so well.

Another fave is to imagine Dr. Sarno has God-like vision on my entire body and systems and is telling me unequivocally that there is absolutely nothing wrong with my body from a physical standpoint.

I've recently been having successing coming back to my breath--feeling the inhale and exhale and doing a yogic breath of fire where I make the inhale and exhale audible. It gives me something to focus on and again, brings me into the precious present moment.

And, I use cannabis on a decently regular basis. I know this is controversial, but there it is. I've had a lot of success with it.

Oh, and I've recently taken to Adult Colouring books! So soothing and relaxing as you really have to focus. Once the kids have been put to bed, I have a toke, listen to the CBC (I'm Canadian, and get colouring. Some may find this weird, but I absolutely love this time!

So, as you can see, I also use several different approaches.

 

Hi, Brendan. I agree with the others who have replied to you about fearing movements when it may be painful.

I think being positive about healing from TMS by discovering harmful emotions is the key to getting over the fear.

Here are a couple of quotes I like about fear...


Oprah Winfrey: “The thing you fear most has no power. Your fear of it is what has the power.”

Jake Gyllenhaal: “Do you know what fear stands for? False Evidence Appearing Real.”

They must have known fear in order to have such thoughts about it.

 

Brendan, I had pain and a lot of anxiety when I was in a job I didn't like. Changing jobs isn't easy any time, and especially, but I suggest you look into it. Meanwhile try to do a hobby or other things you enjoy nights and weekends. It can help get you through these tough times.

Today is a Monday and that alone can bring on anxiety and pain. Take heart and remember, Tuesday is just a few hours away. I try to live in the present, but it's hard to do on a Monday, especially a cloudy and rainy one like today.

 

You must be on the East Coast, @Walt Oleksy, hehe.
One strange but effective idea that has worked for me is to refer to your pain metaphorically. I feel my back pain most when I bend down to pick something up or mop or flow or whatever, so I ask myself, "What in my life do I not want to bend down for? Do I feel like I'm always bending over backwards?" The sensations in the body are a fountain of emotional metaphors. It springboards 'discussion' in my mind.

 

Hey, I'm going through the same issues. Everytime I go to work, my pain skyrockets. I know I hate my job. I working in a store and it's way below my qualifications (M.A. in English). I could be a teacher but I hate public speeches. I feel stuck in the job, but can't find anything better due to high unemployment rate in my city.

Recently, I have been talking to my brain, on my way to work:
"Come on, you know we have to put food on our table, so stop groaning and help me earn some money. We won't be here forever. We'll eventually get a better job."