Feeling stuck vs reaching a plateau

One of the most valuable tibits of wisdom that @TG957 imparts in her book (and there are MANY) Defying the Verdict (which is a great TMS read for anyone!) is plateau's.

This is how she describes being at point in her healing where she felt that she was not "progressing" but not "regressing" - it was a state of neutrality. However it's not where she wanted to stay.

The sense of feeling stuck is a sense of not progressing and not regressing and probably feeling like it's not where we want to stay, but it isn't a state of neutrality. It is the feeling we have no control over being where we are at.

Looking at that subtlety through the nervous system, (which with TMS is stuck in fight/flight or freeze that's not three places: that's three different words for one place: Overdrive. When it is functioning normally fight/flight/freeze - neutral - calm are any of the 3 the levels of it's working state and we flow between any of these three moment to moment) there is a distinct difference. A plateau may not be were you want to stay, but the idea of being there isn't activating the nervous system into overdrive. It isn't creating symptoms like a hyper focused, overly anxious, harsh and judgemental monkey mind. When you are stuck you tend to be in a place of self-judgement of "not good enough". Your mind chatters incessantly about the symptoms, you may be anxious, depressed, angry or sad (the sadness usually covers up the deep anger and rage you are feeling towards this predicament).

So how do you change the idea of being stuck to just being at a plateau? Well, for some of us it just takes time. It's hard to feel like you are just at a plateau until you've seen a measurable difference in your symptoms. So you feel stuck because you still have sensations, or other symptoms? Remember: sensations are NORMAL! Your body is going to have them if you are recovered or not - you just aren't going to have chronic sensations when your nervous system is flowing between all three states.
So it's really helpful to focus LESS on your physical sensations and more on the state of flow of your nervous system, and the internal progress you are making with allowing yourself to be vulnerable, to feel heard, to accept things we realize we've been burying, pushing away or viewing as negative that are really just part of being a human. Journaling is a great way to move through this self inquiry and, as Dr. Sarno suggests, find the deep internal rage all this turmoil has created (even if we don't recognize it at first)

When we are stuck we suffer and feel helpless and hopeless. It is a form of self-victimization which is a very abusive way to speak to ourselves.
When we are at a plateau, we feel we've leveled out to a spot that it's OK to hang out in for a bit, it's neither a good or a bad place - it just is. This might not be where we want to stay, but hanging out here let's us take the time to CHOOSE where we want to go. We recognize we aren't helpless, that things aren't hopeless because we can see the progress we made and that we have choices about how to move forward.

 

Wow, thank you, @Cactusflower ! You dug much deeper into the underpinnings of the state of plateau than I ever did, and so exactly on point and so eloquently! The worst part of being stuck in the plateau is to feel helpless and hopeless! Knowing that not only it is common, but also is very human to go through these cycles helps to get "unstuck" and back into the recovery.