How do we get those repressed emotions out of the basement????

Hi, Everyone,
I have been trying to journal. I am using Schubiner's Unlearn Your Pain. I don't seem to go
deep enough. Today, I was writing about moving forward in my life; since I have decided
to leave a one of my jobs. I was trying to get in touch with my feelings like anger, frustration,
fear... I could identify them but I am not sure I could really feel them; although I did try to.
Is it O.K. just to identify them and not feel them in your heart?

I am going to journal again tomorrow to try to go deeper with moving forward with my life. I believe to get to repressed emotions is like an onion peeling one layer at a time. I am trying to enjoy journaling with no pressure as I peel this onion here.

I like to talk my feelings out loud to myself. I have cried when I do this which makes me feel
so good.

If anyone has any ideas or suggestions how to get those repressed emotions out and to the
surface and out of the basement, please let me know. I would very much appreciate it!!!!!
G.R.

 

i talked to my sister on the phone. The conversations bring up all types of emotion and numerous physical symptoms. I kept thinking I need to forgive her for abandoning me the last 4 years of taking care of my parents. I "know" I woukd benefit from forgiving. But I kept thinking she will abandon me again as things get worse with my parents. I journaled about this for days and continued to have numerous physical symptoms.

I journaled "but she will abandon me again....then what, then what, then what .....I really will be worthess." Tears poured out of me.

Sometimes it is so hard to figure out what exactly is going on in my head. I run through the personality traits. Is it perfectionism, fear of disappointing others, do I "see" someone unhappy with me, fear of failure, fear of rejection....is it all of them...oh yeah can't forget pushing down andand in anger

 

I am also using Schubiner's program and just started the first day of the first week. I did not try to feel too much, as I just was doing what was instructed. I just wrote freely and whatever I was thinking at that moment. I wrote until my "time" was up. I actually had some more pain today after that. I would probably have to relate it to the exercise, which can be a good thing. I think you have to stick with it and keep strong. I also tried the meditation, and found it to be a good tool.

 

Probably 8 months after taking this program I read The Great Pain Deception. Steve believes that low self-worth is core to TMS. I believe he says perfection is the other key trait. (yikes, sure wouldn't want to miss-quote him.) Changing jobs sure brings up terrible fears of rejection for me.

 

Yes, I refer to journaling as delayering the artichoke. Need to make sure you are feeling. Bringing up the feelings so they can be processed out of us is important.

Make sure you are writing I FEEL angry. It may take a couple minutes to bring up the real feelings. Once you are reallly feeling, you will know it.

As you continue to write about your feelings, things that are buried will come up. It happened for me. I remember writing and suddenly stopping and being very surprised at some memories that came up.

Talking your feelings works too. If you cried, you brought up emotion--a good thing!

 

GR: I have been writing for two weeks with the Schubiner plan. It has been a release of all sorts of emotions especially since I have identified areas of my life in the past 35 years I have had anxiety and other symptoms. I think some things you will feel and others are just to get feelings out. Do you go back and read what you wrote with the circle exercise after couple days? Or is it just about writing out your feelings then letting go.

 

Joseph and Phillyjoe, How are you liking Schubiner? I especially like the scripts in the book about talking to
your mind/body. I find these very powerful!!!

Joseph, I think Schubiner explains that after you journal sometimes the pain will increase and when we
really get the emotions out there is a relief. I think you are right you have to keep strong. I like that
he explains you have to believe the program is working. I think that is what is helping me do better
because I keep telling myself you are getting better and better.
G.R.

 

Phillyjoe, I think it is wonderful you been journal for two weeks. Do you feel like it is helping and if
so in what ways? I find journaling helps me understand that there are events, circumstances, and
feelings I did not know that still bothered me. Sometimes, things come out not while I am journaling
but afterwards when I am done journaling.

I do look at the circle exercise and try to see if there is something specific I can journal about from
the circle. I find that exercise very helpful. I think you are right that somethings you feel and
other things you just let out. When I journal and if it is about someone who may have disappointed
me or hurt me, I do try to feel the feelings and connect it to if there is any pain in my body.
I try to sit with the feelings for a little then I let them go and a big part of journaling for me
is to forgive the person even if I doubt feel any unforgiven towards the person. This frees me to
move forward.

I would like to be more consistent with the journaling, since I do not do it everyday. I am not letting
my perfectionist personality though come into play here.

Joseph and Phillyjoe, please let me know how you continue to do with Schubiner's program.
G.R.

 

GR: I am finding the workbook very helpful. I had it in August and wished I had started the work at that time. I have since developed this new symptom so my recovery has been slow. BUT, there has been a relaese of emotions for me that has been somewhat catharsic for me. Writing the letters to others, and one to myself has been very revealing. I also like the pressure point exercise. I wrote a thread early this week, take a look about my question on ignoring vs. attention on pain/symptoms. The support has been great. I tell the patients that I work with that "Recovery is a process" all the time, now I need to start listening to myself. peace. out.

 

G.R.: I read Dr. Sarno first as I am sure most have. I like Dr, Schubiner's program so far. I am on the first week. As I had mentioned before, I noticed my pain increase after this exercise. Traditionally, when something increases pain, you would want to stop that activity. I am convincing myself that this is part of the TMS recovery process and must continue the program. Must remain strong through this process. It is not easy, but Dr. Schubiner and others said you must continue and the light will follow. How are you doing with it??

 

Joseph, I really like Schubiner's program and definitely feel like it is helping me. What works for me is gently
pushing against the pain slowly. This seems to recondition me to certain triggers that trigger the pain.
Another, book I found very helpful is Fred Amir's book, Rapid Recovery from Back and Neck Pain.
It is awesome!!!

 

Lori,
I have read your story many times when I first came onto the wiki. It was so inspirational to me.
I know from your story you did a lot of journaling. Did you find that was the key to your healing?
I do feel more in touch with my feelings now that I am journaling.
G.R.

 

I think journaling was as important in my healing as was believing 100 percent in TMS.

 

G.R.: How far along are you with Dr. Schubiner's program? How far along are you and how is going so far? I am not the greatest when it comes to journaling and find the program helps put it together. I am half way through the first week. I also have been meditating and find it very relaxing. Hope your well!

 

Joseph, I am not doing it so structured. I use the program by following the journal suggestions and
then I review the scripts you say to the brain. The biggest thing I try to do is connect the pain to
the emotions and then talk to my brain telling my brain that I can handle these emotions and
I do not need the pain to warn me about the emotions. I also meditate using deep slow breathing.
I spend each day acknowledging that there is nothing physically wrong with me like Schubiner
suggests.

 

I don't think you need to "get them out of the basement" so much as feel them and be aware that they are there. Think some of the ISTDP exercises in Schubiner are excellent at doing just that, G.R. I think what Dr Sarno says about knowledge being the key is highly apropos. The neuro-scientists might say it involves forging a link between your pre-frontal cortex (the rational part of your brain) and the paleo-mammalian mind (limbic system, hypothalamus, amygdala etc, etc) but I haven't got my at-home brain scanning equipment installed yet!

 

Yes, I do. Because I was stuck in bed, I did A LOT of writing. I think I filled a spiral notebook (100 pages?) quite quickly. I was desperate to get better and get back to life. I made the "list" and worked off of that. some of the topics took more than one writing to feel relieved. But I wrote about my feelings toward various topics/people/situations. Current and past. Anything that you find the least bit bothersome needs attention. Even if it's just a shift in perspective, it is relieving. Writing not just about a sitution, but about your feelings about it.

Note that I think reading Dr. Sarno's "program" pages every day was important too. This is page 142-? in The Divided Mind.

 

Lori, Thanks, I procrastinate journaling. I am sure maybe I don't want to feel certain emotions. I am going to
stick with it and try to enjoy feeling my emotions. I know when I do and I can really get to the deep emotions
I do feel relieved!!! I am so thankful I found this site. It is so encouraging to me. Thank you everyone and
Happy Holidays!!!!!!

 

I have a very limited set of emotions and I don't think they're being repressed. Like I legit can't feel them.

Can't remember the last time I felt envy, jealousy, rage, shock, or revulsion.
Legitimately can't feel guilt or remorse. I wouldn't hurt anyone on purpose, but let's say if I hurt or killed someone by accident, I wouldn't feel remorseful about it at all. I'd feel pity, but not remorse.
Didn't even feel sadness or grief after my boyfriend passed away. And I hate to say it, but I probably wouldn't if anyone did.

But I CAN feel hope, relief, and satisfaction
And interest
Optimism to a limited extent
Affection, trust, desire
Scorn and pity, if those count as emotions

So yeah, I have more "absent" feelings than "present" feelings. And no, they're not being repressed.

 

At least, not consciously, Redditor. Emotionally repressive coping styles evolve to prevent what you're feeling in the unconscious from breaking out into your day-to-day personality where such feelings might be socially inappropriate or embarrassing. Remember that old adage, "Still waters run deep"?