HOW TO DEAL WITH OUR MORTALITY.

Someone today expressed concern about mortality.
I replied with a chapter from my book with Eric Watson, GOD DOES NOT WANT YOU TO BE IN PAIN.
It's available at Createspace eBooks.

“The End Game”

This chapter will be on a subject that may turn you off. We’d rather not think about it, but Dr. Sarno says one of the biggest repressed emotions is our mortality.

I guess I’ve really been one of the lucky ones because I hadn’t started really thinking of my mortality until I turned 80, and I’m 85 now. I’d been to lots of funerals of family and friends, but somehow never thought I’d die. That happens to everyone else, not me.

Well, when I turned 80 that changed. Like when my brother and sister laughed at me for setting out hot chocolate for Santa Claus when I was about six. They said there was no Santa Claus. That hurt, but made me ask, “Then, isn’t there any Easter Bunny either?”

Yes, I was naïve, and probably still am. It may be part of why dogs love me. Lots of people, too.

Anyway, I began journaling about my mortality. Dr. Sarno says many people even younger than I tell him of their anxiety or fear about it, and he says it definitely can trigger TMS into giving us back and other pain.

So I began journaling, Okay, unconscious mind, I do have repressed emotions about dying. To get used to the idea and be as best prepared as I could, I’m praying to God, reading the Holy Bible, saying the Rosary daily, and watching the Catholic and Protestant television channels that take us through the Bible chapter and verse. I’ve learned a lot, more than I ever did at Sunday Mass.

Catholics and other Christians and people of other faiths believe we have a soul and go somewhere in spirit after we take our last breath and leave our earthly body. Great, I hope they’re right and that we do. I hope wherever I go that there is no pain, no mortgage or credit card or other debt, no computers, cell phones, or other handheld devices. I hope there are dogs. Lots of dogs, and if in our next life I can have a job, I’d like to care for dogs, and/or other animals. I just love animals.

I admit I’m apprehensive about dying. Everyone probably is. It’s not anyone’s favorite subject, so I won’t journal long on it. I do feel I have faith and believe Jesus died for our sins and forgives us ours, and He is the son of God and we are guided by them and the Holy Spirit.

Some theologians say that’s all it takes to go to Paradise, the place before Heaven. I hope so. I sure don’t want to go to the other place, the one down under, and I don’t mean Australia.

I haven’t had much physical pain in my long life, besides the back pain the last few months, but I still am anxious about dying. It sure would be great to be both pain and debt free, but dying seems such a drastic way to do that. So I began going online to see what others thought on the subject, and found considerable comfort. I hope it helps, you, too.

I think it would be best if I died in my sleep, like my father, mother, and brother. If not, I hope I could die with dignity and courage, like some of my favorite movie stars, Ann Sheridan, Gary Cooper, and John Wayne. They knew they had terminal cancer, but accepted it, like two of my favorite relatives, Uncle Ray and Aunt Maggie. They didn’t go to a hospice, just stayed at home and enjoyed their final days of living, dying a few years apart. Ray did warn me not to smoke. He said he coughed endlessly and felt terrible the last ten years of his life. End of commercial.


I want to digress for a moment and tell a little about Uncle Ray and Aunt Maggie. He was one of my father’s younger brothers and one of my favorites. After serving in World War II, he returned to Chicago and married a college English teacher, my Aunt Margaret who liked being called Maggie.

It was because she married into the family that I went to college. That was just for rich kids when I graduated from high school in 1948, and after graduation, only two of my classmates went to college. One of them was a big fellow who got a football scholarship.

After I graduated from high school, I worked for two years in the Chicago Tribune garage as assistant to the parts manager, then in microphotography for the U.S. Treasury Department. Aunt Maggie made it a crusade to get her new nephews and nieces to go to college.

When she urged me in that direction I said we couldn’t afford it, so she told me about Navy Pier Illinois, the two-year branch of the University of Illinois in Chicago, where she taught English. I could go there for $40 a semester plus the cost of books.

I asked my folks if I could quit my job at the Treasury Department which was going nowhere and they said sure. I told Mom on the day I enrolled at Navy Pier, I was really glad to be going to college because “I won’t be bored anymore.” And I haven’t been. All my cousins later followed her advice and went to college. Bless you, Maggie. I’m sure she’s now playing in some bridge club up in the sky.


Now back to feeling an acceptance of my mortality, I did a lot of online reading of famous people and how they achieved peace.

It makes me wonder about the greedy rich and others who, far from loving their neighbor (unless they are like themselves), care anything about them. Do they believe in God or a life after this one? This life ends in death, and as they say, “You can’t take it with you.” Maybe they think you can, like the Pharaohs of ancient Egypt.

I went on the Internet and found many quotes on death and dying. Most were comforting, so I would like to share them with you. I think what they have to say on those twin subjects also can be applied to accepting just about anything, including whatever kind of pain that has been thrown at us, from physical pain to losing a loved one, a job, or a house.

I think of America’s and Allied service men and women who were injured in Iraq or Afghanistan and how bravely they are learning to live with mechanical limbs or walking with a white cane. They still choose to live, although they have seen their comrades die in war.

Here, then, are some words on our mortality from a wide range of men and women throughout the years. I think they also can be applied to any symptom from TMS.


“I thank my God for graciously granting me the opportunity of learning that death is the key which unlocks the door to our true happiness” – Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart (1756-1791) Austrian composer.


“For three days after death, hair and fingernails continue to grow, but phone calls taper off.” – Johnny Carson (1925-2005) American television host, comedian.


“The years seem to rush by now, and I think of death as a fast approaching end of a journey – double and treble the reason for loving as well as working while it is day.” – George Eliot (Mary Ann Evans) (1819-1880) British novelist.


“Death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down. The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone and no one is going to make fun of you.” -- Woody Allen (1935- ), American movie writer, actor, director.


“Courage is the art of being the only one who knows you’re scared to death.” -- Earl Wilson (1907-1987) American author, journalist.


“It is not death that a man should fear, but he should fear never beginning to live.” – Marcus Aurelius (121-169 BC) Roman emperor.


“The only difference between death and taxes is that death doesn’t get worse every time Congress meets.” -- Will Rogers (1879-1935) American humorist, actor.


“It is better to spend one day contemplating the birth and death of all things than a hundred years never contemplating beginnings and endings.” – Gautama Buddha (563-483 BC) Indian founder of Buddhism.


“According to most studies, people’s number one fear is public speaking. Number two is death. This means to the average person, if you go to a funeral, you’re better off in the casket than doing the eulogy.” – Jerry Seinfeld (1954- ) American actor.


“Death is the beginning, the birth of births, a rebirth, a second chance to fix all mistakes. Death is the beginning.” – Marc Lampe (dates unknown) author.


“Death is but the next great adventure” – J.K. Rowling (1965- ) British author (Harry Potter).


“Fear of death increases in exact proportion to increase in wealth.” – Ernest Hemingway (1899-1961) American author.


“I look upon death to be as necessary to our health as sleep. We shall rise refreshed in the morning.” – Benjamin Franklin (1706-1790) American patriot, author, printer, inventor.


“Death may be the greatest of all human blessings.” – Socrates (469-399 BC) Greek philosopher.


“I have good hope that there is something after death.” – Plato (424-348 BC) Greek philosopher.


“Animals have these advantages over man: they never hear the clock strike, they die without any idea of death, they have no theologians to instruct them, their last moments are not disturbed by unwelcome and unpleasant ceremonies or the cost of their funeral.” – Francois-Marie Voltaire (1694-1778) French philosopher, writer.


“If you brood about disaster, you will get it. Brood about death and you hasten your demise. Think positively and masterfully, with confidence and faith, and life becomes more secure, more fraught with action, richer in achievement and experience.” – Swami Vivekananda (1863-1902) Indian philosopher, yoga teacher.


“Once you accept your own death, all of a sudden you’re free to live.” – Saul Alinsky (1909-1972) American writer, community advocate organizer.


“Our death is not an end if we can live on in our children and the younger generation. For they are us, our bodies are only wilted leaves on the tree of life.” – Albert Einstein (1879-1955) German theoretical physicist.


“I am not afraid of death, I just don’t want to be there when it happens.” – Woody Allen


“She did but dream of heaven and she was there.” – John Dryden (1631-1700) British poet.


“Remember that you have only one soul; that you have only one death to die; that you have only one life… If you do this, there will be many things about which you care nothing.” – St. Teresa of Avila (1515-1582) Spanish Carmelite nun.


“Death, the last voyage, the longest, and the best.” – Thomas Wolfe (1900-1938) American author.


“Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.” -- The Holy Bible.


“For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.” -- The Holy Bible, Romans 6:23.


“Wither thou goest, I will go; and where thou lodgest, I will lodge; thy people shall be my people, and thy God my God; where thou diest, will I die, and there will I be buried; the Lord do so to me, and more also, if aught but death part thee and me.” – The Holy Bible.


“In order to go on living one must try to escape the death involved in perfectionism.” – Hannah Arendt (1906-1975) German-American philosopher.


“We sometimes congratulate ourselves at the moment of waking from a troubled dream; it may be so the moment after death.” – Nathaniel Hawthorne (1804-1864) American novelist.


“Most women do not grieve so much for the death of their lovers for love’s-sake, as to show they were worthy of being loved.” – Francois La Rochefoucauld (1613-1680) French author.


“Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever.” – Mahatma Gandhi (1869-1948) Indian philosopher, nonviolence protest advocate.


“There is no death, only transition. Knowing that we are spirit incarnated on Earth to discover our true self throughout physical form, and knowing that Spirit does not die, then we can understand that death is nothing to fear because it is then really only a transition and a ‘return to home.’” – Deepak Chopra (1946- ) Indian-American physician, holistic health advocate.


“Death – the last sleep? No, it is the final awakening.” – Sir Walter Scott (1771-1982) Scottish novelist.


“Death is nothing else but going home to God, the bond of love will be unbroken for all eternity.” – Mother Teresa (1910-1997) Albanian Roman Catholic nun, savant of the poor and destitute.


“I believe there are two sides to the phenomenon known as death, this side where we live, and the other side when we shall continue to live. Eternity does not start with death. We are in eternity now.” – Rev. Norman Vincent Peale (1898-1993) American minister and self-help author.


“Ancient Egyptians believed that upon death they would be asked two questions, and their answers would determine whether they could continue their journey in the afterlife. The first question was, ‘Did you bring joy?’ The second was, ‘Did you find joy?’” – Leo Buscaglia (1924-1998) American author, educator.


“As a well spent day brings sleep, so life well used brings happy death.” – Leonardo DaVinci (1452-1519) Italian painter, sculptor, architect, inventor.


“No man goes before his time – unless the boss leaves early.” – Groucho Marx (1890-1977) American comedian, actor.


“You live on Earth only for a few short years which you call an incarnation, and then you leave your body as an outworn dress and go for refreshment to your true home in the spirit.” – White Eagle (1840-1914) Native American Ponca Indian chief.


“So live your life that the fear of death can never enter your heart. Trouble no one about their religion; respect others in their view, and demand that they respect yours. Love your life, perfect your life, beautify all things in your life. Seek to make your life long and its purpose in the service of your people. Prepare a noble death song for the day when you go over the great divide. Sing your death song and die like a hero going home.” – Tecumseh (1768-1813) Native American Shawnee Indian chief.


“I intend to live forever – or die trying.” -- Groucho Marx.


“Be calm. God waits you at the door.” – Gabriel Garcia Marquez (1927-) Colombian novelist.


“Nothing can happen more beautiful than death.” – Walt Whitman (1819- ) Author, poet.


“Courage is being scared to death but saddling up anyway.” – John Wayne (1907-1979) American actor.


My favorite and most comforting thoughts on accepting my own mortality come from Irish writer C.S. Lewis (1898-1963) who said,


“Has this world been so kind to you that you should leave with regret? There are better things ahead than any we leave behind.”


That’s what I call wisdom, and acceptance. More of Lewis in my chapter on faith.

My own conclusion and advice to myself: If you believe in God, you should not fear death; you should welcome it.

I’m trying to take my own advice, and that of Buddha, whose philosophy on death could be the best one on life -- living our lives emotionally, spiritually, and physically without pain:

“The secret of health for both mind and body is not to mourn for the past, not to worry about the future, or not to anticipate troubles, but to live in the present moment wisely and earnestly.”

I’ve also wondered, even worried, about whether I’ll see my beloved doggies in heaven. Martin Luther (1483-1546) assured us that our canine and feline and other pet friends will join us there when he wrote: “Be thou comforted, little dog, Thou too in Resurrection shall have a little golden tail.”

To close this part of my final chapter, Billy Graham gives us some comforting thoughts on our mortality: “I’ve read the last page of The Bible. It’s going to turn out all right.”

 

“It is not death that a man should fear, but he should fear never beginning to live.” – Marcus Aurelius (121-169 BC) Roman emperor. BE PRESENT

“Remember that you have only one soul; that you have only one death to die; that you have only one life… If you do this, there will be many things about which you care nothing.” – St. Teresa of Avila (1515-1582) Spanish Carmelite nun.
SO TRUE

“There is no death, only transition. Knowing that we are spirit incarnated on Earth to discover our true self throughout physical form, and knowing that Spirit does not die, then we can understand that death is nothing to fear because it is then really only a transition and a ‘return to home.’” – Deepak Chopra (1946- ) Indian-American physician, holistic health advocate. THIS IS HOPE

“Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.” -- The Holy Bible. FAVORITE PRAYER

“Our death is not an end if we can live on in our children and the younger generation. For they are us, our bodies are only wilted leaves on the tree of life.” – Albert Einstein (1879-1955) German theoretical physicist. I WOULD GIVE MY LIFE FOR MY SON